Last night my thoughts turned back to you.
Back to everything I thought we had.
Back to everything I thought we'd be
Back to everything that we were.
But what were we? Nothing really.
I held onto a ribbon, a ribbon from a dress I wore the night we flirted and I saw you as something more. A dress I wore when you dropped a glass and wine splashed onto my dress. A dress I had never cleaned. I
I held the dress I wore the first time we went on a date. Our first date. Our only date. I held it close to me in the hopes that I would feel close to you.
I checked my phone and I still carried your number.
Why? Because a small part of me still holds onto you. I deleted the number and yet a part of me wanted to hesitate.
Why? We're over. We have been over for two years now. I think I will hold onto you for longer still because you were my first. You weren't my first crush, but you were my first boyfriend, we never kissed and I still carry that regret of opportunity.
Still thinking of you, I went to Facebook and I deleted all the messages, our conversations that I had saved.
It's time to let go now or at least try to.
It's time to let go even though I never cried.
It's time to let go.