the superbowl just started and i am still not excited. this is one of those games where we dont care who wins. i have been feeling empty lately and i dont know what can fill that hole. i was in love with my best friend four years ago and i thought i was over it...well im not. i love him so much but he is in love with my best girl friend. which makes it all the more hard to deal with everyday life. i jusr wish he looked at me the way he did her. loved me the way he did her. his eyes are beautiful and his smile is perfect. his hands are warm when they rest on my shoulders or hips when we hug. his breath at my ear. the way his cheek rubs mine. and he doesnt even know the effect he has on me. he has no clue that his warmth drives me nuts. i am jumping out of my shoes trying to send him signs but if he thinks i am coming off too strong, i will lose my best friend. and i wont lose him. never.
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