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camomatt's Journal
Forming without a mold
To form your own, true opinions without the influence of society is quite a feat. But possible? Not so sure.

The music I listen to, the people I talk with, the games that I play, the shows that I watch; no matter where one turns, society is playing an influence in who you are and what you do and who you see and what is heard and so on.

So how does one make themselves their own person, or form without a mold? One can't. No matter how small the influence, society will always find a way to chip away at your structure to make you as it wants (consciously or not). Let's see about an example.

Music. I listen to quite a few genres, but it seems no matter where I turn, they will find themselves linking to alcohol or sex or whatever. "Your Lower Back", "The Nosebleed Section", "Broadripple's Burning", "On a Freezing Chicago Street", "Fluorescent Adolescent". Granted, 3 of those songs are from a single artist and 1 is a hiphop/rap group. But I stand by my point; they seem to link to sex or drugs. And undoubtedly, this has placed an impact on me, especially when amplified by...

Discussion. I hear people talk about sex and drugs and etc.. I don't know what to make of it. In some ways, I see myself looking at my alarm clock of opportunity and think 'looks like I'm late for the party'. Of course, in according with my religion, I had held off. I'm happy I did, yet at the same time, pretty bummed out.


I've lost my momentum (or what little of it there was) for several reasons. Just going to end by saying I'm so happy yet so angry and sad and frustrated at the same time. Happy I followed my rules, angry I didn't break them, sad that I likely won't be able to, and frustrated that I will need to find (unlikely) an opportunity.

Just popping this in here: I have yet to determine concrete thoughts on sex, drugs, and the such. So I guess it is, in fact, fortunate I haven't gotten involved.

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