Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

 
 

View User's Journal

S I S K A T A Y A
I often fail, and it's a great thing!
Let's talk about failure today.

Over the past few weeks, many people have reached out to me to talk about failure - failure to eat well, failure to be active, failure to stick to a plan to get to their goals, or failure to keep the fat off. I noticed that in each of their stories, there is attached to this failure a sense of personal lack; a sense of overwhelming moral judgment the speaker places on him/herself. The stories are saturated with phrases like "I'm a failure - I can't do this" or "I'm a failure and I'll never succeed so why bother?".

When I hear such words, it disheartens me because one thing I know for sure is that it is only through failure that any one of us can ever truly succeed in becoming healthy and whole and breaking the cycle of obesity and personal shame.

Sometimes blessings come to us in forms we don't want or expect, and failure is one of those blessings. We all fail regularly at something in our lives, but what we need to understand, what we must get, is that failure is the way to success. Failure points out our weak places; shows us where we need to improve. Without failing, we would never be able to grow and become as strong, capable, and amazing as we have the potential to be. It is through overcoming struggles and challenges, through failing, that we temper our resolve and find authentic solutions to our problems.

With regards to losing weight and gaining health, failure is not a moral issue - it does not indicate how good of a person you are, how capable you are, or what your outcome will be. Thinking of it in such terms is self-limiting dialogue that reinforces bad habits and negativity. What you need to do is emotionally step back from the situation and view things critically. Failure is not a personal attack - it is simply an outcome of things you have tried. Failure provides us with a golden opportunity to learn and improve our lives if we view it in a healthy way. If you are not taking the lessons from failing, if you internalize and personalize the failure, you will continue making the same mistakes.

If you have failed to stick to eating healthily, rather than say "I can't do this - I'm a failure" you should ask yourself "Why have I failed to make healthy eating decisions?". Rather than say "I gained all my fat back - I'm a failure" ask yourself "Why did I fail to keep the fat off?". Always remember that "failing" and "being a failure" are two different things. Failure should allow you to ask the right questions you need answered in order to succeed.

The best lessons I have learned on my journey to good health have come from failure, not instant success. I fail all the time - every week there is something new that shows me my weak points. And I am grateful for the blessing of this failure because I know when I finally understand and embrace the lesson, I'll be so much stronger, happier, and healthier than I ever could be had I not failed.

Think about it smilies/icon_smile.gif






User Comments: [10] [add]
Sakura Rosina
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Tue Dec 04, 2012 @ 11:30pm
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for writing about this specific topic. My dad is trying so hard to lose weight and become healthier but has a hard time dealing with failure. Would it be okay to share this with him? ^^;


commentCommented on: Wed Dec 05, 2012 @ 12:39am
Sakura Rosina, thank for the comment! I hope your dad is doing well, and continues his path toward great health. Feel free to share anything in my journal with him if you think it would help! Remind him that this is a process, and that sometimes we have to fall in order to rise higher smilies/icon_biggrin.gif



siskataya
Gaia Staff
nanieru
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Wed Dec 05, 2012 @ 06:25pm
You couldn't write it with much more eloquence.
Love it. <3


commentCommented on: Wed Dec 05, 2012 @ 09:44pm
One thing one should always do is to accept who you are more than what you look like. That is a bigger issue and if one is unable to get past that, one cannot accomplish anything else either.
For women it is harder to lose weight (because Nature made it that hard for a reason). One needs to focus more on being healthy. Everything else comes a bit easier. Don't fuss with the scale on a daily basis because that only causes stress. We women gain and lose 1 - 5 pounds of weight in water every month. So not getting stressed about that makes it easier too.

Thanks for sharing Sisky! Keep it up! You doing good! smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif



Nyadriel
Community Member
Woekkie
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Sat Jan 12, 2013 @ 10:44pm
As Edison said I didn't fail a 100 times , i've found 100 ways ways that don't work.
Life is trial and error.
But failure doesn't really exist we're merely discovering how not to do stuff and get back in the saddle.
It's one of the things that helped me beat obesity 26 years ago.
Keep up the good fight and don't give up.
It's not a diet it's a lifechange you're making.
edit: Also try avoiding GMO's and high fructose corn syrup that also helps.


commentCommented on: Wed Jan 16, 2013 @ 01:57am
I have felt that way before that "I'm a failure cause I didn't continue to eat my diet" but I have to loose some weight so that I can be at my healthy weight and it doesn't effect my health or anything. I'm glad that there is somebody who is doing this type of thing and is sharing their Advice like this. :3



Aya_Natsume2012
Community Member
Hashtable
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Thu Jan 17, 2013 @ 06:02am
"Determination is your ally! Errors are entirely normal. Appreciate and enjoy your privilege to make mistakes - the more you make the sooner you excel." -- from a beginner's go book

Oh so true. ;u;

Thanks for posting this. smilies/icon_heart.gif


commentCommented on: Wed Jan 23, 2013 @ 09:20pm
SO THIS!!!! I was feeling pretty low for the past two days - I'm also on a journey to wellness - and I just overcame the urge to sit around and wallow in my misery by slamming out a killer workout and then I come to read this. Reading this really re-enforced that overcoming a failure is when your biggest success comes from! Thank you!



Bombodess
Community Member
la_ptitevache
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Sun Feb 17, 2013 @ 09:28pm
Quote:
If you have failed to stick to eating healthily, rather than say "I can't do this - I'm a failure" you should ask yourself "Why have I failed to make healthy eating decisions?". Rather than say "I gained all my fat back - I'm a failure" ask yourself "Why did I fail to keep the fat off?". Always remember that "failing" and "being a failure" are two different things. Failure should allow you to ask the right questions you need answered in order to succeed.
The best lessons I have learned on my journey to good health have come from failure, not instant success. I fail all the time - every week there is something new that shows me my weak points. And I am grateful for the blessing of this failure because I know when I finally understand and embrace the lesson, I'll be so much stronger, happier, and healthier than I ever could be had I not failed.


Thanks for this. I just kind of stumbled onto your journal, and I'm very grateful for the stumble that led me here.

I started eating healthier last summer and things were going great.. and then around September, it's like I hit a road block and instead of asking myself "why" things were happening, I accepted it as failure in myself. Which definitely didn't help my perception of myself and sent me whirling down into a depressive state. I hit rock bottom, and am just barely starting to swim towards the top again. But what you've written here has made me realize that I should be asking myself questions. So that I can not only realize where I failed, but why. Also that my failure, is just an obstacle I must overcome so that I can continue on my path.
This has really opened my eyes, and I say thank you, from the bottom of my heart. ^-^ cat_smilies/icon_nodding.gif


commentCommented on: Tue Jul 30, 2013 @ 10:59pm
Thank you for your journal entry. I feel that after reading it, I can actually feel good about myself. smilies/icon_3nodding.gif
Your awesome! emotion_smilies/icon_awesomeface.gif



LetterAi
Community Member
User Comments: [10] [add]
 
 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get Items
Get Gaia Cash
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games