Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
I didn't mean to hurt your feelings...I was aiming for your face
I hear your silence loud and clear
Why do today what you could put off till tomorrow?
Education is important, school however, is another matter.
Don’t mess with me I've got a stick.
If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving.
I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
Help I've fallen and i cant...hey nice carpet!
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
Lifes Tough, get a helmet
Only in America, do banks have braile on the drive-thru ATMs.
Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections?
Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
It is not MY fault that I never learned to accept responsibility
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths
The cops never find it as funny as you do
Banedemon · Fri Oct 12, 2012 @ 11:48am · 0 Comments |