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September 21, 2012
*Some nights it gets so bad, I almost pick up the phone...*
I spent the mourning & afternoon wishing I could say the words or do the things or even just to be at the place to get the chance to try...
I could use some insight, Ive never ******** up as succsessfully as when I let this happen & if it takes me forever to fix it I will.
I wont give up on you... I never have & I never will. everything could change, hell everything has but that doesnt mean I will lose sight of the truth or that I will fall to my knees conform & throw in the towel. This waiting, this limbo, its not life its chess and I REFUSE to lose!
There is simply too much too much at stake...
I know the rules cannot be broken, & I know the odds were stacked purposely against my favour & that after so long most would simply say all hope is lost...
but they are wrong, as long as we breathe there is ALWAYS hope & failing that as has occurred to me many a time in the past, who needs hope when u believe?
And I believe... I always have & NO amount of lies could change that. You've always said you lack faith but you always fail to mention that its never hindered your conviction! A determination for survival that could astound the bravest. You made the call you thought you had to and I did the same, but belief refused to let us forget and conviction will set the balance back again & determination will keep us alive until then.
I will never forget the truth, I will always believe, I will never give up the fight,
I promise...
I promise you I will...
*Trade baby blues for wide eyed browns, I sleep in your old shirts & walk though this house in your shoes I know its strange, it's a strange way of saying I know Im supposed to love you, I am supposed to love you!*
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