restless night!
last night i kept tossing and turning, holding my vincent plushie close for the ache in my mind from a state of panic due to memories. I use to go to a culinary school and liked it alot! other than the pressure and bad grades, the baking classes were fun. memories of being abandoneed by who i thought were my friends flooded my mind. shelby my best friend i met there never knew that i was treated bad by "our" friends. i always told her i was ok and i had other things to do anyway. i lied to her so she wouldn't feel guilt. i remember finally telling her the truth when i stayed a wknd at her place and cried. those time when i was alone there i would cry in my room praing that i would find a true friend. i also rememberred when we got a knew rm mate that i had to stay in my room for it wasnt my right to hang out in the kitchen or living when really all my stuff was out there. tears welled in my eyes from these flooding memories. how sometimes i wish i was back in that apartment and could fix things to where i could fit in. *sigh* its all in the past now. can i ever let that go? if i truely can, why haven't i?
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sephiroth7
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Blood Fairy Goddess
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