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Chosan
Community Member
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22 comments
Have I outgrown Gaia?
I remember when I started on this site. I was an awkward teen. I had few friends, and I didn't like to talk with other people. I only liked Gaia because of the pretty dress up options. Eventually I learned to talk to people, and I had a lot of fun meeting new people from all over the world. I still have many of the friends I meet on Gaia, and I am ever so appreciative to have had this site around for me when I needed it.

I'm in my mid 20s now. I have much less trouble talking with new people. I am friendly and I can chat with just about anymore. But then I've tried coming back to Gaia, in hopes of either meeting more people or sharing that kind of experience, but I find myself faced with people who are much less friendly than they used to be.

I feel so surprised at the change in people that are found on Gaia. No longer do I see the friendly groups that once taught me how to get out of my shell and become a more outgoing friendly person. Instead, I see people who would have most likely shoved me right back in my shell if I hadn't already gotten out of it.

I know the kids of today are much different from back in my day sweatdrop (am I 60 already?) or maybe they're not so different. I mean the reason why it was so difficult for me to communicate in reality was because of those scary people that existed in real life. Only now they exist in virtual life as well.

I did a paper about cyber bullying, and I've read how people are extending their ability to be mean to others wherever they might be. I find it so sad that the world has become a much darker place where people won't talk to somebody else in hopes of helping them, but to tell them something very awful and nasty. It breaks my heart seeing the next generation being so unforgiving and cruel towards other people for no particular reason but to be mean.

Some people may think that I'm being a wuss, that if someone told me to go away or to keep my opinions to myself is not "mean". You know what though, I think if you say anything that only has the intention of hurting someone and being rude, then that is mean. You are entitled to an opinion, but it doesn't have to be delivered in a manner that is either overly defensive and lashing out basically.

Anyways, I feel disheartened by what I've seen in the Forums on Gaia tonight. Although there are still some people who are willing to talk in a kind way, the number of those who are seemingly immature and closed off to the possibility of civil conversation and can only live in drama and confrontational discussions seem to outnumber the kind ones.

To any of my friends who read this entry, I will still come on from time to time, but maybe a better way to find me is through facebook, just look up Chosan, there's only one of me. I just don't feel like this is the Gaia I knew and loved anymore.





User Comments: [22]
Dereshi
Community Member





Thu May 03, 2012 @ 09:42pm


I know exactly what you mean. There was a time when I would actively participate in discussions about just about every matter of life. But there always were people who couldn't state they're opininions without a demeaning tone against yours. Or even better, you could explain the same fact over and over again and instead of answering to it, they insist to flip over what you said, taking some things completely out of it's context and claim things you never said.

Now I just keep the conversation casual most of the time. Oh and it's even worse if you play competitive online games (like shooters). No one seems to be able to take a defeat politely.


Chosan
Community Member





Mon May 07, 2012 @ 12:34am


Yea it seems as though people don't even want to pretend to be polite anymore. The anonymity of the internet used to be beneficial in that in brought out opinions that people were too afraid to bring out in person. But it seems to have brought out the nastiness in people as well. I was out in the street the other day and these kids were so inconsiderate to the other people on the street. They were loud, obnoxious, taking up the entire street just laughing and playing. Not that laughing and playing is bad, but when you're blocking off the street and knocking into other people without so much of a sorry, plus you're so loud that people can hear you from three streets down, I find that a problem.

I just wonder where civilization is going with this kind of "individualism" where people are free to to do and say whatever they want without considering they may be hurting other people.

I'm sad to see this kind of thing, and personally I wouldn't feel safe bringing life to this world if I wasn't sure that I could bring up my child to become a considerate and at least somewhat generally polite person. Because kids will always learn from their classmates and friends. I don't want my kid, if I ever have one, to be like that.


Dereshi
Community Member





Mon May 07, 2012 @ 11:45am


When I was a child I'd have respect or even fear the older ones (teens). But now the kids would have like no holds barred with their cursing and if you told them back they'd just say: "it doesn't matter that you're bigger than me, if you lay a hand on me I'll just call my big brother." That kind of attitude.

And I once read some article about internet+personality. Some people claim that they're only acting so cocky due to the anonymity. But that article said that however people act on the internet, it's part of what his character in real life is. The internet only enhances it. I couldn't agree more.


Chosan
Community Member





Tue May 08, 2012 @ 03:03am


That makes sense, that people feel able to act however they want on the internet due to the anonymity of it all. So does that means with each generation, there are more and more jerks out there? I wonder why people let their kids be like that. What happened to respecting other people? What is this "no fear" attitude that kids seem to have? It's like, "I don't care if you're a truck coming at me." people die like that. Is it because we're living in a progressively aggressive world that if we don't act like giant asses we can't survive?

Or is it true that people are born evil and that society (the old style at least) would teach us the right way to be. But now that society seems to consist of people letting people be people, we don't teach manners, or rules, or respect. Instead we teach them to take anything they can get, and attack anything that we don't like?

If that's the case, I fear these expectations that people need to be selfish, conceited, disrespectful, inconsiderate and rude to survive. I fear what society will become. A dog eat dog world? I fear for the future. I fear for all of us what we will become.


Dereshi
Community Member





Tue May 08, 2012 @ 11:49am


I feel a general lack of responsibility too. It feels like there are less and less people you can't truly count on. Promises - especially those of love and marriage - are given away too casually. The mindset comletely changed. There's nothing to hold on for the rest of your life anymore. If you don't like it, toss it. That might be the case with children too.

I believe it's like the chinese saying "Half from heaven, half from earth". Whereas the emphasis should be on the earth's half. People might be born with more evil tendencies than others, but it's the people around them that ultimately shapes them.

With the shortage of water and food we're facing (and will be even more in near future) I fear that what comes will only be worse. Or maybe, maybe exactly these problems will set things straight. "When the ship gets to the bridge it will straighten itself out" (or however u can translate that).


Chosan
Community Member





Wed May 09, 2012 @ 03:14am


You mean there are less people you CAN truly count on right? That's true, with divorce there really aren't that many "till death do we part" marriages. If you don't like your children toss em?

And unfortunately it seems people are validating those evil tendencies. Dishonesty will get you places, stuff like that.

Sigh, I don't know. I don't have much faith in humankind no more. It's like we're so obsessed with our individual benefits, MY water, MY food etc. Somehow this ship seems hard to straighten.


Dereshi
Community Member





Wed May 09, 2012 @ 11:53pm


Yeah, of course. Typo in the heat of battle :p And well didn't mean it literally (although there are lots of newborns being left to die somewhere out in the cold) but some parents simply doesn't seem to care to what happens with their children or what they will become for that matter. So there's no big difference to actually tossing them away.

Yeah talk about careers, especially politics rolleyes

Sadly. Future doesn't look that bright indeed.


Chosan
Community Member





Thu May 10, 2012 @ 04:47am


I figured XD but just making sure. I think it might be better if they actually literally toss them. Call me an elitist, but if you're not going to grow up right, considering the lacking of resources and stuff, it might not hurt to get rid of a couple >.>

Which is really really annoying. I hate how some people are so arrogant and hostile towards people they're supposed to work with. They're not a team but rivals. It's no wonder so many people have depression.

Titanic ending up ahead!


Dereshi
Community Member





Thu May 10, 2012 @ 01:50pm


Or even better. Use birth control if you're not interested in children at all. We are overpopulated enough as it is. Some people say it's also partly due to our advances in medicine that people who would naturally die (and sometimes they might be even better off dead than in living hell), are still living on. They do have a point.


Chosan
Community Member





Fri May 11, 2012 @ 07:01am


I wonder if that's why we're seeing so many natural disaster. It's a higher power trying to balance out the population XD

Not to say that the recent disasters aren't horrible, but just saying..


Dereshi
Community Member





Fri May 11, 2012 @ 11:58am


That's a possibility I wouldn't discard xD Not to mention all those new diseases that are popping up. Evolution is always a step ahead of us.


Chosan
Community Member





Sun May 13, 2012 @ 12:47am


That's true! Haha I remember the studies saying that we weren't meant to live this long which is why we're seeing all these diseases that we didn't used to. It's evolution's population cap XD when population hits this level it triggers the disease code!


Dereshi
Community Member





Sun May 13, 2012 @ 12:20pm


I can't decide wether I should be afraid or not xD


Chosan
Community Member





Tue May 15, 2012 @ 03:50am


Well as the Chinese saying goes: Eat the rice as it is cooked! (take things as they come)

Have wine today, get drunk today xDDDDDDDD


Dereshi
Community Member





Tue May 15, 2012 @ 11:35am


Wine? Did I hear wine?

"All men are brothers inside the four seas"

CHEERS! blaugh


Chosan
Community Member





Tue May 15, 2012 @ 10:45pm


Yea some of these sayings were so man directed XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

But then again, I really liked the kind of connection guys had back in the day that you don't quite see in today's society. What happened to sticking swords at the hip?


Dereshi
Community Member





Wed May 16, 2012 @ 11:43am


Yeah Swords. Times back then weren't flawless, but I really miss some things they had back then.


Chosan
Community Member





Thu May 17, 2012 @ 06:20am


I agree they had their flaws. But their style, their connectedness to the people in their lives was amazing. I know people don't like gender stereotypes, but I have to say though people played their role well.
Nowadays we try not to be those roles, it's to the point where I don't really know what people are trying to be. If nothing else, romantic relationships seemed more direct. Guy likes girl, girl accepts or rejects. Nowadays it's guy/girl likes girl/guy, girl/guy will make a fuss that you can't tell if it's accept or reject.


Dereshi
Community Member





Thu May 17, 2012 @ 10:51am


Definitely. It's like the emphasis of a relationship is put on the part before rather than after marriage. Maybe that's why we get so many divorces.
And yeah some people clearly haven't got the true meaning of emancipation. Instead they have taken it to a level beyond stupidity.


Chosan
Community Member





Fri May 18, 2012 @ 05:00am


Well now that people have that freedom to leave, they aren't trying as hard as they would to make the marriage work as they would have in the past when you literally were bound to "death till you part". It would make sense then that people focus mainly on the part before marriage rather than after (some never even make it that far).

Well fighting for equal rights seems to mean nowadays one person taking as many rights for themselves, not giving a damn that their benefit is at the cost of another person. However if you tell them that they'll say you're an idiot *sigh* the truth hurts buddy!


Dereshi
Community Member





Fri May 18, 2012 @ 12:12pm


Not that you couldn't get yourself divorced back then. But as a female your life was basically over if you did.

And people are listening to those people just cause they want to show off. "Look I'm doing stuff for society".


Chosan
Community Member





Fri May 18, 2012 @ 07:13pm


Pretty much. Your parents wouldn't take you back, you have no career and no inlaws to take care of you.

*sigh* true true


User Comments: [22]
 
 
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