I Have

Have you ever felt like just
Sitting down..
Taking a breath....
And crying?
Crying
For the pain youve been through
The people whove hurt you
The friends youve lost
Memories
You cant forget

Have you ever wanted to pour your feelings out?
But didnt want others to know the
Real
True
Painful things
Have you ever gotten so mad...
You just..
Cried
Because you felt
lost, depressed, confused and afraid
worthless and shallow
abused and blamed
Ripped apart and destroyed
Then left
Have you ever had the urge...
To hurt yourself?
To make sure
You could feel real pain
To make sure everything was
Real
to cut yourself,
to bruise your body,
Slam yourself against a wall
abuse yourself......
Of course...
You deserve it
In your mind
You put yourself through torture
over and over again
Cried and cried with no one knowing
Wanting to end it all
with
one cut....
one bang...
one hit...
one drink....
ANYTHING
Have you ever been alive
and felt so....

Dead