Reflection: My few thoughts about what recently happened in the world of Pandora Hearts, the world where everyone discovers who they really are.
Dammit: I was just about to talk to Break-kun when he just up and took the last piece of reflection I had and read it like a book. It was embarrassing and I was hoping that he wouldn't read my thoughts: I DO need privacy once in a while. Anyway he seemed amused at the most part except what I had written on what I had said to Bruma. The smile on his face told me that he did appreciate my concern for his privacy and that I would punish anyone if they tried to pry him for it.
"Ah, so you're more comfortable around me are you?" he asked me with that sly smile of his. I looked away with my flushed cheeks and mumbled to myself that he had taken the reflection away from me so easily. "Well it explains why you're so clingy to me, especially on the way you've acted recently" he commented.
"I-I'm just worried about you is all! You were nearly unconscious after you overused Mad Hatter a few days ago!" I yelled at him. Even after reading my reflection he seemed to have no clue on how much he meant to me. He only chuckled at my response and told me how innocent I was as he patted my head. I started to rant at him about random stuff but inside I couldn't help but see Xellos-sama in him. Though at one point, he did stop teasing me and started to talk rather... calmly towards me: he was concerned a little about what I had said about Xellos-sama coming through him to talk to me. He asked if he was just a tool for me to manipulate or that he was just a substitute for Xellos-sama. Right then I burst out saying that I would never think of him like that and that it was stupid for him to even think I'd do that.
"You're right, you aren't someone who does that to people. You try to be considerate of their feelings even when sometimes you want to just burst out about your own opinions. But, you seem to cling too much on people who are or remind you of your loved ones and that... is something you need to work on" he told me as he ate a slice of cake whole. Was he right? Was I too clingy to people I cared about or people who reminded me of someone I cherish. I thought about this for a bit till I realized that he was right: I was relying on people to comfort me a little too much and was very clingy. My eyes must've said something to Break-kun because the next thing he said was that I wasn't as annoying as he made me sound but it's just that I have to work on not being so clingy is all. Hmph that's easier said then done seeing that I've done this my whole life, even in my revealed memories (like Belphegor and me for instance) I would cling to someone when I was scared or wanted comfort.
Sure back then it was harmless since I was a child but here I am almost an adult and I still do it with people. I felt like a burden then, though the comforting hand on my shoulder from Break-kun said that it was all right. He gave me such a nice smile and said the most happiest thing I wanted to hear in so long.
"Now concerning your fiance, Xellos. I can see from your little letter that you miss him terribly and wish to see him, though both of you are so busy you really don't have time. But, if you want, I might be able to have some sort of contact with him in the near future" he told me. I felt so relieved that he was considering (more like he was going to) making contact with Xellos-sama that I glomped him.
Now from that and writing this I feel so much better now: I can look forward to the future with little on my shoulders. Break-kun is really kind when you get to know him and I think he is very wonderful company. And NO that doesn't mean I'll be giving you candy all the time Break-kun -Yes I know that you're going to read this so don't deny it-. Anyway it's time to go: we have to go see Oz's father and the Baskervilles in Sabrie.
· Mon Aug 30, 2010 @ 02:44am · 0 Comments