||Exits can be found to your left and right
Alrighty kids, as promised in the last entry, the rant requested by an unknown someone in a topic from the general chat. Abandon ship while you can, and smoke 'em if you got 'em, cause here comes the rant!!
*drum roll as the TV blips on*
Salilus2099: Strap yourself in, it's rant time.
Athalwolf2099: but I dun wanna go
Salilus2099: Too late now.
Athalwolf2099: *clink clink clink* nooooooo
Salilus2099: Today, we explore the taboos and fetishes that come with tentacle rape
Salilus2099: Hige titties
Salilus2099: And... anything else I can think of.
Athalwolf2099: sounds like fun
Salilus2099: Note: You do not get to take place in any of said fetishes.
Salilus2099: And if I see even the first bit of flesh from you that I shouldn't see, it's castration time.
Salilus2099: Good man.
Salilus2099: So, on the topic of tentacle rape... why is it everywhere?
Athalwolf2099: because they have so many tentacles
Salilus2099: Yeah but, why do they have such a massive market for it?
Salilus2099: There are even pictures out there of real asian women pretending to be raped by giant rubbery "tentacles"
Salilus2099: Who honostly wants that?!
Athalwolf2099: uhh because people see it as a one man gang bang?
Salilus2099: Maybe i'm just too vanilla for this particular fetish
Athalwolf2099: guess it goes along with the power stuff
Salilus2099: But somehow, the concept of an octopus like being ramming his tentacles through a ladies unseen treasures strikes me as terrifying
Salilus2099: Not sexually arousing.
Athalwolf2099: gotta remember, its normally not marketed twords the women
Salilus2099: Tell some of the girls I know that. >.>
Salilus2099: I'm not dropping names though.
Salilus2099: But this raises another interesting question
Athalwolf2099: which is?
Salilus2099: why do these demons, tentacle beasts or... whatever, have such an infatuation with human girls?
Salilus2099: wouldn't that be as taboo for them as you humping a sheep?
Athalwolf2099: because there are never any female ones of them around
Salilus2099: Heh, try to imagine what a female demon monster would be.
Salilus2099: Instead of an army of tentacle dicks, she's just one massive collection of holes ripe for the plugging.
Athalwolf2099: wonder how the parents would react to that
Salilus2099: Parents of what? The sex monsters?
Salilus2099: I'm sure they'd react with pride.
Athalwolf2099: because they are always going for those human girls
Salilus2099: "Awww, my little billy is already out molesting school girls."
Salilus2099: Maybe it's some sort of bizarre right of passage for them.
Salilus2099: Like how middle school boys are expected to start looking at porn, or show an interest in girls
Athalwolf2099: your not a real monster...till ya rape a bunch of girls?
Salilus2099: Puberty for tentacle beasts is the gang rape of a ninja school girl battle mech user with ancient magical powers in a short skirt.
Athalwolf2099: makes a much sence as everything else
Salilus2099: It all becomes clear now!
Athalwolf2099: budget cuts, she couldn't afford pants
Athalwolf2099: or a skirt that doesn't rip when touched
Salilus2099: But lets side step the tentacle beasts themselves
Salilus2099: I want to raise up a very interesting point
Salilus2099: In some incredibly twisted peices of hentai there can be found people whose p***s itself splits into the tentacles
Athalwolf2099: ah yes
Salilus2099: Which are ofcourse capable of lifting and tossing, and ofcourse raping, women
Athalwolf2099: no hands at all
Salilus2099: Which brings me to the question of how they trained their c**k for that trick
Salilus2099: Now, maybe i'm just under developed down there, but i'm pretty sure my p***s does not operate like an elephants trunk
Athalwolf2099: see thats where the whole "rape all the schoolgirls" comes in
Salilus2099: Far as I know, I can't bend it or wrap it around anything, let alone lift something several times its size with it.
Athalwolf2099: so it seems to me....you need to go have alot more sex
Salilus2099: So only through countless sexual intercourse will my johnson have the skill and dexterity of a monkeys tail?
Athalwolf2099: of course
Salilus2099: Well, I suppose that's one mystery out of the way
Salilus2099: Now on to the huge tittied ladies.
Salilus2099: what makes me sad here is the fact that there are actually women with boobs that size.
Salilus2099: I'm not talking Pamela Anderson big, but boobs that could be used to reflect cruise missles
Salilus2099: The Blob from Xmen is only the size of one of them
Athalwolf2099: seen one of those on the TV >.>
Salilus2099: Why does ANYONE have an attraction to boobs like that?!
Athalwolf2099: why do people cut themselves? no one will know
Salilus2099: I don't think self mutilation is to be explored in this topic
Salilus2099: Unless it's the sorta bondadge cutting sex
Salilus2099: In which case, sure, we'll touch on that later.
Athalwolf2099: they probably like them because...hmm
Athalwolf2099: women over there aren't the biggest around
Athalwolf2099: so they want boobs
Salilus2099: Supposedly neither are thier men
Salilus2099: But I don't see female hentai makers making men with horse cocks
Athalwolf2099: *points to first topic*
Salilus2099: Unless... you are right!
Salilus2099: It's all just a clever form of over compisation!
Athalwolf2099: its most stuff?
Salilus2099: Point taken.
Athalwolf2099: isn't >.>
Salilus2099: So we've basicly solved one of the greatest mysteries concerning japanese cartoon porn!
Athalwolf2099: we deserve medals!
Salilus2099: But ofcourse, we can't simply dump all of the cartoon perversions on Japan
Athalwolf2099: ...or unlimited access to their porn stash...either will work
Athalwolf2099: but that makes it so much simpler
Salilus2099: No, we in America have made our fair share of cartoon porn too.
Athalwolf2099: but its all...not...good
Salilus2099: Let us not forget the 1970's brand of cartoon porn that featured a Bugs Bunny type hero
Salilus2099: Wait.. you've actually watched it?
Salilus2099: Damn man, I was just going off rumor and history.
Athalwolf2099: no >.>
Salilus2099: Riiiight. Well, let's abandon this topic while we still have some dignity.
Salilus2099: Point taken. =(
Salilus2099: End Rant! Now!!
Salilus2099: ...is it over?
Athalwolf2099: "please exit to your left and watch your step"
Salilus2099: that's a no.
*The TV blips off*
There you have it. Tentacle rape and massive boobed ladies are just ways for needle dicked men to try and make up for themselves and their flat chested wives. Remember, if you have any rant suggestions or requests, please feel free to post them, thank you.
· Sun Nov 13, 2005 @ 02:55am · 4 Comments