Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

 
 

View User's Journal

Soul Balance (c)2005
Comment on my journals. I got a story going again. Do ya like it? Stay tooned!
((HOLY CRAP AN UPDATE?))

Let It All Sink In

The walk resumed. Nick took the lead again but this time Lily remained close to his side. She made no effort to establish any physical connection. She simply remained close by while starring at the ground. She would occasionally look up at him and attempt to say something but words would fail her. If he ever looked back at her she’d simply snap her head back down wringing her hands in frustration. Nick also felt conflicted but not for the same reason Lily was. He had failed. True he had no way of knowing that the creature intended to kill them but he probably could have guessed it wanted a fight. Not that it mattered anyway. He knew damn well he was too weak and untrained to have stood a chance against the demonic foe. Still with the weight of this rag tag team securely resting on his shoulders, he felt he was responsible for making sense of what had just happened. He found himself wondering how one could rationalize the sudden proof of the existence of angels and demons. Found it hard to comprehend how it was that he and his friends had somehow been chosen to fight in a conflict that was older than the very theme it embodied. The concept of the ever presence evil that could strike again at any moment sent shivers down his spine and thus the words that continued to burn in his mind came as no surprise. “I need to become stronger.” He grumbled. “Wh-what?” Lily stammered looking bolt up at him. “Nothing,” was Nick’s emotionless response. Feeling relieved that something had broken the silence but saddened by his lack of elaboration, Lily stared back at the ground.
Trailing just behind the two silent conflicted members of the group was Ryan though he didn’t like this fact. For the majority of the walk he had been trying to take up of the rear but no matter how hard he tried, Jaq just forced herself to trailing even farther back. Though Ryan assumed it was because she was afraid he was trying to talk with her, the idea couldn’t have been farther from his mind. He kept running the past fight over and over in his head. He knew what had gone wrong. That was the easy part. The hard part was figuring out what he could have done to change the initial outcome. Thoughts of why he should never have looked away from his opponent and several other basic combat tactics he had foolishly disregarded flooded his mind. He had let himself become clouded by petty emotions. Yes, his best friend had been incapacitated right before his very eyes and yes at the time he had no way of knowing if he was dead, but this was still no excuse. One does not lack compassion simply because he choose not to acknowledge a fallen comrade in the heat of battle if it means that in doing so they might preserve themselves long enough to safely aid said comrade later on. This fact was simply common sense. It is only logical to ensure that one is truly safe enough to show compassion and emotion. Still, he could not help feeling callous for even considering ignoring a comrade in need, especially when that person was his best friend. And so Ryan continued this inner conflict while attempting to fall back behind Jaq to ensure their safety. It became a sort of penance for his rookie mistakes.
Jaq was having the toughest time out of everyone with regards to processing all that had transpired. She thought herself to be a very level headed and rational person and yet no matter how hard she tried she could not convince herself that what she had just been through had been nothing more than a hallucination. For starters, there were three other people that could attest to the events that had transpired. Her back had never felt better and yet the pain she had felt still echoed in her mind. The words she had heard, the pain she had experienced, and the angelic person she had encountered weren’t simply going away. They were, in fact, doing quite the opposite. These lingering memories continued to plague her. Things that shouldn’t exist seemed to be irrefutably legitimate now. Angels, Demons, battles between good and evil, plots that sounded like the stuff of poorly made video games and fantasy books. These things couldn’t possibly be real. This was the real world. And in the real world you worried about real things. School. Your family. Your friends. Your job. In the real world you made real choices. What to wear, what to eat, who to talk to, what to drink, should I party I have work tomorrow morning? These were normal, average, every day questions. Not, will some creature from a sci-fi book come out from the shadows and kill me? Not, is my guardian angel really looking out for me right now? Not, will I die tomorrow? Questions. Improbabilities. These were the things that instilled fear and doubt. Strangely, not once did Jaq think to confine in her friends what she was thinking. She simply acted tougher, forcing her position at the rear of the pack and gritting her teeth.
In short, one could cut the tension with a knife. That’s when Nick’s cell rang. A louder vibration, the sound of plastic hitting metal change and nothing more but none the less the group seemed to tense up all at once with the sound. Relieved at the realization that this was a safe and harmless noise, Nick withdrew his phone from his pocket and flipped it open bringing it up to his ear. “H-hello.” He stuttered. The group stopped walking circling up around him. “Yeah we’re still on our way.” More silence and then, “Yes it’s Ryan, Jaq, Me, and uh… you know the guys. Why?” Nick tapped his foot nervously. “Okay so ya want us to take care of ourselves. We can handle that, it’s what we thought from the beginning anyway. Do Mom and Da…” Nick allowed himself to relax rolling his eyes. “Okay sure whatever just… thanks for letting me know. Got it. Bye.” Nick hung up the phone.
“What was that all about?” Ryan asked. “Nothing,” Nick responded blankly. “The folks are out for the night with my aunt and uncle and Jill has been invited to stay over at her friend’s place which simply confirms what I already knew. The place is ours for the night. No big deal. It’s probably better this way right? We’ll just have to stop by somewhere on the way and get some food. Any suggestions?” Nick even surprised himself. He had literally snapped back into his normal ever day life just like that, as if nothing had happened. They had narrowly escaped death and he had just casual asked what everybody was hungry for. “Wow…” Jaq started but Ryan cut her off. “Seriously man? Really? Are you for real here?” He began laughing hysterically. Lily glanced from Nick to Ryan nervously. “What? What is it? I don’t get the joke.” She stammered. Suddenly Jaq began to laugh. She didn’t know why but she just joined in with Ryan tears rolling down her face as she doubled over awkwardly holding her sides. “I don’t get it either guys all I asked was…” Nick stopped looked at them and then brought his palm squarely against his forehead joining them in their seemingly unprovoked laughter. “I get it. I mean… and I… and then with the whole…” He tried to say between breathes and chuckles. “Exact…ly. I mean… and it’s like… and whatdya you guys want… to eat…” was all Ryan could respond with. “What’s wrong with you guys?” Lily blurted stomping her foot. “Seriously you’re scaring… me…” They looked up at her stopping just long enough to hear her stomach growl. Lily froze and all four of them looked at each other. The four of them burst out laughing not just at the irony of the situation, but at how pathetic they had been acting. They had spent so much time reflecting, they had forgotten that they weren’t alone in all this. With this in mind they laughed their way to Eves Street where Nick steered them left towards food.
“This… this is still some serious bullshit.” Jaq finally managed to gasp as they reached a nearby fast food restaurant. They were less than five minutes from Nick’s house now and surprisingly hungry. “I mean…” She stopped mid-sentence as Nick raised his hand up to cut her off. “Listen, I don’t know about you guys but I don’t feel entirely comfortable talking about this whole thing right now in a restaurant full off people, even if it is a fast food one.” He glanced at each one of them. “It’s not to say I don’t want to discuss this and I’m glad we seemed to be ready to but what do ya say we just kinda let it slide for now. Relax and talk about other things, at least while we eat here in public. Besides, I don’t think people would understand the context of the conversation enough to simply ignore it so we would probably draw unwanted attention.” Nick held the door open for them and Jaq silently nodded in approval. This sentiment was seemingly shared by all and so they ordered their food respectably and sat at a booth with their assorted numbers for order reference. They fell to talking about the little things they used to. Teachers that had it in for them, what they were gonna do over the summer, and even what movies they should watch that night. Simple talk, but some of it had hidden application to the situation. For instance, Ryan would mention his martial arts lessons would be continuing during the break and Nick would say, “That reminds me, it would be cool if you could help me put together some sort of work out. I’m a little out of practice and could use the conditioning.” This of course not only confirmed that Nick understood his weakness but wished to correct it. Or Jaq would say something like, “Ya know the beach would be a cool place to hang this summer and just do whatever.” And everyone would agree making the beach one of their reoccurring places for hanging out and preparing themselves for the coming conflict. Even something as simple as, “I wonder what our friends are up to this weekend?” Was Nick’s subtle way of asking the question that was on everybody else’s mind. Could their friends help too? Would they help? Hanging out with them was one thing but if things got heavy would they also be chosen, would they even care? Still, any onlooker that spied them as the food reached the table would have mistook them for any old group of friends eating burgers and discussing summer plans and what not. No one could have guessed that they had been left to die in an abandoned store earlier that night.
They threw out the trash from their meals and headed out the stores back door down Royal Oil Street towards Potter Street where Nick’s empty house would be waiting. Ryan and Nick discussed the latest video games they were playing. Ryan was discussing the flaws in the party system used in a certain zombie apocalypse based first person shooter while Nick continued to discuss and debate the idea that RPG games like the one he was playing had a way of conveying deep story line and forcing you to care about the characters. How each character had moves that supported the others and how some characters could do team based attacks. To any passer by it sounded like a couple of gamers chatting it up, but to Ryan and Nick this was subtle tactics and strategy in its most base form. What Ryan was really saying was that splitting up was not an option. Staying close and protecting the weak link in the group, in this case Ryan nominated Lily for this example, was crucial. Nick was discussing the practical application of teamwork in moves. He was also suggesting the idea that training together could yield to better timing with regards to attacks and powerful counters. This would seem absurd to most normal people but this was a special case. Things that couldn’t possible happen were in fact occurring, enemies that had no business in the real world seemed to be on their way, and the two figured that if these things were actually happening in real life, then the strategies from the fantasy worlds that seemed to thrive off of these things would be more than helpful. Jaq on the other hand decided it was time to figure out what made this Lily girl tick. “Hey blondie!” Lily winced. “You know… you’re blonde too Jacque.” Not the best start for the conversation. For starters, her full name was being used and there was a reason everybody called her Jaq. Then there was the fact that she hated being reminded of her hair color. This fact angered her in that it put her in a category of air-headed, prepy, bimbos that she had spent most of her life trying to avoid. Jaq restrained herself though and decided to choose her next words carefully. “Really? I… didn’t… notice. Thank you every so much for pointing that out.” Jaq blinked several times in a row before continuing. “As I was saying, what exactly is your deal anyway?” Lily didn’t really understand the question. She considered that she was asking about the comment she had made earlier about them feeling connected but then remembered that she was one of Nick’s friends and so her history with him might put her at a bit of a disadvantage. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Lily quietly replied starring at the ground. “Oh you know damn well what I’m talking about. Look at you. Blonde girly-girl, probably rich, star tennis athlete, little miss popular, do I have all this right?” Jaq sarcastically tallied off each of her personal grievances with the girl. “Just what exactly are you getting at?” Lily asked confused and somewhat scared at the distaste she heard in Jaq’s words. “I mean what’s a girl like you doing with a group like us anyway? You just get bored of your perfect life is that it? Ya take pleasure out of raising up peoples hopes, make’n em think there good enough for ya and then…” “Now wait just a minute.” Lily cut her off. “You’re not being fair. You don’t know anything about me so where do you get off?” By this time Nick and Ryan had picked up on the conversation. As Nick turned to defend Lily, Ryan stopped him placing a hand squarely on Nick’s shoulder. “Don’t you dare. I had a hard enough time keeping focused when you got knocked out and we are friends. We don’t need you doing anything stupid for a girl who probably will just hurt you again.” He whispered. Nick struggled a bit then stopped. The party had halted only two doors down from Nick’s house and it seemed they weren’t continuing until Jaq and Lily hit some common ground. “Where do I get off?” Jaq blurted out becoming annoyed with her. “You think I don’t know why you pranced yourself over to us? You think I was born yesterday. I am still a girl and I know how bitchy we can be,” She leaned in close to Lily grabbing her by the arm and whispered in her ear, “Especially when we’re trying to prove something.”
At this point Ryan had caught on to where the conversation was heading. He pulled Nick towards the door to his house. “Get your key out and let’s open the place up huh?” He spoke all the while pulling him further and further away.” “Wh-wh-wait a minute. I can’t just…” Nick started to protest but it would seem this wasn’t an option. As they got further away Jaq’s voice got closer to normal volume. She even let go of Lily’s arm. “Listen. It’s late, I’m tired, and just like you I’m dealing with some really ******** up s**t right now. But don’t forget, Nick is too. So if you do anything, anything!” She glared at her. “To make this any harder on him so help me God I will kick your b***h a** all the way back home do you understand?” Lily blinked back tears. “I said do you understand?” Lily quickly stared at the ground and nodded slowly. “Good. Now stop crying. You’re not a child so stop acting like one. At this Lily’s face began to burn. “Excuse me? I mean now that’s really unfair. I get it, big strong you defending your friend, but who says you know why I came over? How do you know what my intentions were? Why, because I never gave him a chance? Because I shot him down before we even started dating? Let me guess, you think I’m just some shallow Newport b***h right? Well all these assumptions and playing acting to scare me, they’re just as childish don’t ya think? Nice double standard it’s real nice.” There was some truth in her words. The fact was that Lily mainly stayed with them out of fear of being alone but she had still wanted to thank Nick for trying to keep her out of harms way and taking the brunt end of a shot directed at her. In truth, it wasn’t that she didn’t like him, she was just afraid of what might happen if she gave him a chance. Most guys she went out with were pretty straight forward. They were either assholes that wouldn’t last a day or jerks too self absorbed to notice she had gotten over them. They only wanted her because she was popular and attractive. Not because of what she was into or what she liked to do. The idea of a guy she only sort of knew who was interested in more than just the idea of her made her worry. She wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment and the idea that he seemed to be would make any girl nervous. Or so she thought. In truth, she did kind of like him but he was part of an alternative crowd that more popular clicks viewed as taboo. For the life of her she could never understand why but they seemed to protect him and he returned the favor. From what she gathered they seemed to have the same interests and it was refreshing to her conversations that didn’t begin and or end with, man I was so wasted last night. A new fear shot through her now though. If Jaq didn’t like her then how could she rely on her in desperate moments. She couldn’t afford to be the one in the group no one liked simply because of her past and the person high school and popularity had made her out to be. It wasn’t fair that she was being so cruelly tested based on a past that seemed so trivial now. But seeing how much the three seemed to know and care about each other helped her understand a little more as to why Jaq was being so hostile. But why now? Lily snapped her head up and looked Jaq squarely in the eyes. “I’m sorry for any pain I might have brought your friend but I assure you it was not my intention. In fact, I did what I did to avoid hurting him in the first place. If you’re worried about me furthering the damage then don’t. I have no interest in torturing anyone. We need to be able to rely on each other and bickering over petty issues from months past is just as counter productive as toying with someone’s emotions.” She had floored Jaq with the speed and conviction of the statement. Most of all, the use of counter productive gave Jaq the impression that maybe she had misjudged the girl. Still Jaq had only begun to fight. “Fine. That’s all I care about. I’ll forget about what you’ve done for now only because I agree with you. We do need to support each other here and I don’t want to be the one to let this group down either. But this doesn’t mean I like you. I am a tolerant person to a certain extent. Pray you don’t convince me to change my mind.” Jaq brushed past her and Lily felt herself heat up inside again. She grabbed Jaq’s arm and looked at her, tears still in her eyes. “You’re wrong about me. You know that? You’re… you’re wrong.” Jaq was taken aback. She struggled to get her arm free and upon doing so took several steps back before staring at the ground. “I’m not gonna apologize just because you got the waterworks going hun. But you do understand were I’m coming from here right? You couldn’t have blown back into his life at a worse time.” She looked up and forced a sarcastic smile. At first Lily didn’t get the humor, but suddenly it clicked. “I don’t suppose any kind of drama would be appreciated right now huh?” She too cracked a rueful smile. They were like two rivals in a competition that had no real prize.
“What’s happening?” Nick kept trying to squeeze past Ryan as they waited in the now opened doorway. “Seriously Ry…” “Shhh…” He replied. “I think they’re about ready to throw down. My money’s on Jaq… nothing personal buddy.” Jaq glanced over at Ryan. “I heard that! What are you apologizing for? I could take her with my eyes closed.” “What? Excuse me but I’ll have you know that tennis keeps me in pretty good shape there tomboy!” Lily retorted. “Tomboy?!” Jaq jokingly yelled. “And in this corner, the buxom blonde bombshell from back of the Bayside, Jaq Stevenson! In the blue corner the spunky athletic seductive newcomer from sunny Newport, Lily… uh what’s her last name again?” Ryan belted out impersonating a boxing ring announcer as best as he could up until the end. “Guys seriously knock it off and bring it inside. It’s late and the neighbors would love to call the cops on a front yard cat fight.” Nick joked finally getting past Ryan. “Cat fight?!” Jaq and Lily yelled in unison turning on Nick “What do you mean cat fight?” As the four charged through the door to the house pinching, joking, and generally causing a commotion the weight on everyone’s shoulders seemed to fade again. Tonight they were going to watch some DVDs and eat snacks until the wee hours of the night and nothing could change that. Life was good again. For now anyway.





 
 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum