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My journal. Anything you really need to know about me is in here.
It's self-explanitory.
HOLY SHIZ!!! ((New Years journal entry))
Holy s**t! A-LOT has happened since my last entry. smilies/icon_sweatdrop.gif ((Sorry it's been so long))

Something that happened was that I ended up being a carnie for a few months. HOLY s**t!! That was a "Learning experience"! And, literally, a near-death experience! HOLY s**t! That was both fun, and terrifying! I got to make many more good friends in there, but, it was definately a death trap. I spent the first month-and-a-half working 14 hour days, then going to bed in a 14-by-8 bunk. Yeah, that was nice... If you like PRISION!! And now, I am not so nice-nice, like I used to be. I pretty much found out that all people are assholes --Atleast, most people are-- And that carnies have it ROUGH! ******** ya'all that make carnie jokes! It's hard s**t! But, anyway... I am getting side-tracked... smilies/icon_sweatdrop.gif Well, I ended up getting massively sick... My spleen enlarged, and I ended up in the hospital for about a week... Well, in-and-out of the hospital... The doctor told me that if I worked one more day, I would have died... LITERALLY! That sucked... smilies/icon_sad.gif I am still having problems with it.... I am still experiencing bad pain every so-often. smilies/icon_sweatdrop.gif But, I am livin'! The whole reason why i got so sick was because I was working 16 - 18 hours a day, every day... I was only eating what they had at the P.N.E --For those of you who don't know, it's the Vancouver "Amusement park"--And that was really GREASY food! Like, only a asian food stand near my game, and a White Spot that only made burgers. *Shudders* smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif Not to mention the thousands of people I had to deal with everyday. I ******** HATE PEOPLE! THOSE ********!! I wish I could have killed most of them because they where all DONKEY-RAPING s**t-EATERS!!! smilies/icon_scream.gif smilies/icon_exclaim.gif *Clears throat* But... Yeah... smilies/icon_sweatdrop.gif It was horrid. The stress level was INSANE! And I was only paid $50.00 A DAY! That's IT!! ******** BULLSHIT! Pretty much, I had 8 hours of sleep, and to do whatever I wanted.... AND THAT WAS ******** NOTHING!!! I'd like to see someone even TRY to do what I did! They'd be DEAD! .... But.. Yeah... I think I am done with the whole carnie thing now. smilies/icon_xd.gif

Another thing that happened to me was that my sister started to treat me like s**t. She ended up using me more like a person to dump her kid on, then a babysitter. I AM ******** 20!! I am NOT suppose to be my 8-year-old niece's MOTHER! She is! That ******** b***h! smilies/icon_scream.gif ... Anyway, I am the one actually raising her now... I am the one that makes her breakfast/lunch/dinner, taker her/pick her up from school, explain everything to her-- Like what "sex" means!--, spend time with her, help her with her homework, and even put her into bed! I can't keep living like this! I just tell her that I can't babysit anymore... I can't STAND IT! It's ******** SICK! smilies/icon_gonk.gif What the ******** am I suppose to do!? I keep babysitting --for FREE, because my sister is too ******** cheap to pay me-- just because I worry about my niece. If I don't do anything, no-one else will! And I don't want to send her to a foster home, because I went through that myself. It is a horrible thing for a kid to have to go though. Expecially since she is 8-years-old. But, I think that I already mentioned that. smilies/icon_sweatdrop.gif But.. Now onto another rant. smilies/icon_xd.gif

********!!! I cannot trust a ******** SOUL! Not anymore! I treated Jen like a friend... A GOOD FRIEND NONE-THE-LESS!!! And she back-stabbed me! She stole from me, and Laura! What a ******** b***h! And I don't care if she reads this.. She can go AHEAD! She is a ******** theif! All she ever does is use people, until they stop giving her things, then she ******** off, and makes excuses of WHY she can't return ANYTHING! FOR ******** SAKES! How low does someone need to be in order to STEAL from someone that considered you a CLOSE FRIEND!? The biggest reason why I am so pissed off is not because of the stuff, it's because I even gave her a second chance to be friends with Laura, and myself... AGAIN! I am so ******** PATHETIC! I talked to her for a ******** HALF HOUR on the phone. I stayed calm, even though I wanted to say ******** more than I did... I was so angry that I puked my guts out afterwards.. It broke my heart that she would do this to someone! What a ******** heartless b***h! And I am a ******** MORON for believing, "Well.. Uh... After all of this... Can we still be friends?".. I ******** believed it.. After I KNEW that she would back-stab me! That was stupid. Now, I don't really trust anyone... I only trust a few people these days.. But, I do know that I will NEVER help anyone, nor will I lend out to anyone, ever again! So, you can blame her for my new attitude torwards people. smilies/icon_evil.gif

But, I am just getting my rantings out for the New Years... I don't want to be sad, nor angry, anymore... About anything... I feel like ripping my hair out because of Jen, my sister, and the whole carnival thing.. but, I think I will make it... I just know that I am changed.. Probably not for the better... But, I still have changed. Like I said, I don't care for just about anyone anymore.. I have turned into a pretty big hard-a**.. I've decided that I am done being nice. All that being nice has done for me is rewin my life. Look at what Jen did to me, just because I was nice. All I know now is that I shouldn't care anymore. And that I am going to do everything that I can to get even with those who ******** with me.

That reminds me of one more thing. Last year, about this time... A group of ******** decided to trow ice-balls at me. I shot their asses up with paintball guns last year... But, that wasn't good enough for me, oh NO! I ran into one of the ******** on the BUS! I followed him off, and beat the living ******** out of him until he was passed out, and bloody.. I pretty much blanked out on him. I was so angry about everything. About Jen, about my sister, about my dad, and about just... EVERYTHING! And the ******** just stared at me on the bus.. Like a dumb s**t. So, I decided to teach him a lesson not to ******** with someone. After I was done, I left him there... Busted up, and bloody.. He was passed out in the snow, but, I didn't care what would happen to him. All I know is that I felt better about it after... Does that make me nuts? Probably... But, I think that I have every right to be a little nuts... Some people just deserve a beat-down.

Anyway, I think that should be enough... For now.. There is more that happened to me, but, there's just some things that piss me off so much, that I just don't want to let it out. Somethings are better left un-said. And, I don't think that everyone needs to know everything about me, not right now anyway. So, goodnight. And don't ******** with me right now... It's cool to call me up, or send me a PM to say hello... Or, whatever... But please, don't ******** with me.. I have had enough... And I don't want to blank-out, beat the living ******** out of anyone anymore...

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  • User Comments: [3]
    wow now that is a rant.I am sorry that all this happened to you.I hope i dont piss u off any time soon lol.I hope i havent pissed u off at all.I am glad u r becoming a hard a**.that means u wont put up with much more.

    comment kc_kat1959 · Community Member · Wed Jan 30, 2008 @ 03:30am
    thank you for you're comment Kat. smilies/icon_biggrin.gif smilies/icon_heart.gif

    And don't worry.. You don't piss me off ata ll. ^.^

    comment quayla666 · Community Member · Sun Feb 03, 2008 @ 07:13pm
    wow what a rant lol.I can see yur quite pissed off at everyone.Hope yur not pissed off at me for something.U should be moving out soon so u dont have to deal with this s**t no more.

    comment Cheekycheekz2786 · Community Member · Tue Feb 05, 2008 @ 09:48pm
    User Comments: [3]

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