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At 9:20 in the morning of the eighth of May 1987, a stupendous thing occurred. This happening was the single most momentous thing to have happened since the surrender of Germany forty-two years previously, thus ending World War II in Europe. Some even say that the former transcended that magnificent moment of history, but I digress. The matter in question was the birth of a redheaded baby, who upon being brought screaming and kicking into the world got slapped by some Doctor and promptly beat the s**t out of him. That Doctor still eats through a straw. That baby was I.

Suddenly the world became a better place.

Now, since my innate arrogance has run it's course, I will type up my rant, so that my readers can chuckle and chortle away at it's ridiculousness. Those from other countries, or even other states, can even marvel at the inanity of Victorian law.

In Victoria, Australia, the legal drinking age is 18. The legal voting age is 18. The legal driving age is eighteen. Does anyone else see the problem here? Far be it from me to point out the bleeding obvious (Actually, that?s something I greatly enjoy) but don't you think that it would be better if we drove to the electoral offices SOBER?

Luckily, I was born without my head wedged firmly up my a**, but unfortunately many of my fellow men suffer from that most terrible of afflictions, stupidity. The stupidity that makes you drive while pissed. The stupidity that makes you vote for the Greens. The stupidity that indicates that you are from Queensland or Tasmania. It is a sorry turn of events when you book a driving lesson for your birthday and celebrate passing it by drinking yourself stupid. It's even worse when the law makes this possible.

The only problem is, what to do? Should we put the legal drinking age up? If we did, there would be riots in the street. Also, pretending that no-one drinks illegally is almost as naive as thinking that Michael Moore tells the truth, or that that Korean guy who beat you thirty seven times at Starcraft consecutively was just lucky. Putting the driving age up is likely to also cause riots (although those rioting would be unable to reach the marching grounds, hardy harr harr!). Putting the voting age up wouldn't help either, as no one wants to do it anyway, and morons would probably celebrate by getting hammered.

As always, the biggest problem is solving the little ones. And I don't care anyway, I don't drink, I vote Liberal, and if some b*****d runs into me drunk I'll sue his a** off.

Marduk Get out of my way, I'm drunk and I vote! Yalgumn

P.S A typo only proved that I am not perfect, which is something I will readily admit to. I am more perfect than you, but not absolutely perfect. blaugh