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Homigawdjournal.
This journal will be to let people know what my days are like, what music plays in my head, who in the world I hate, and my opinions on random garbage that half of the people on Gaia could care less about. :D.
Fat bottomed girls...!
I love that song. If you don't get the reference, you must follow one of the two paths of destiny:
1. Kill yourself for being so lame.
or!
2. Go get Queen's Greatest Hits. Pirate it if you have to.

I assume the song is initially about roady floosies that found their way into members of rock bands' underpants over the years. Or it could be that the members of Queen simply found bubble-butts as rawr as me. And people thought they were gay? Pfff. I mean, maybe one of them was, but the group as a whole just HAD to be. I mean, come on. The songs speak for their sexualities. READ THE LYRICS, THERE'S A SECRET MESSAGE INSIDE! Haha, MSI reference. Which reminds me... a long time ago, like in middle school, my friend showed me 'Another One Bites The Dust' played backwards. It says somewhere in the chorus 'heehuh it's fun to smoke marijuana'. I don't believe in that psychological crap like it'll mess with your brain and make you do things, but it surely did amuse me. So I started playing various songs backwards to see if I could find something no one else had (Chicago? Little Nicky? Haha... man). Of course, that was a phase that lasted something like a day. Just recently, though, the dream came back to haunt me, as my a*****e friend Adam (yes he's an a*****e and my friend, Wtf?) showed me one of the songs from Halo 3... I think. At any rate, it was purposed orchestrated backwards or something, 'cause when you play it forward, it's gibberish with some awesome orchestrals. When you play it backwards, it reciprocates, killing the orchestrals and stringing on about angels and fate and... stuff. I wasn't paying much attention, but it was pretty deep... I think.

Anyway, how've you all been since my last entry? Good, I hope. Of course, you can't really tell me as I'm composing this, so my retort to your good notions and feelings will probably go unnoticed. D; If you're feeling bad, then I'm sorry, but I just can't feel too bad for you right now. And if you're angry with me (though most people aren't, and the only ones who are tend to be poorly placed emotionally/mentally), please eat me. I would probably very much enjoy it after the fiasco's I've gone through lately.

Well... let's see. Let's start with the basics. My virginity is becoming a burden more and more everyday. If I don't find that particular release with a certain someone soon, I'm going to lose my mind. Pictures and movies and... blah just aren't doing it for me anymore. Like the Blink 182 song, I could really use a b*****b. Ohman, there goes the PG-13 rating again. Well, I won't get in-depth into it, I guess. I just thought I should share my feelings, as I'm really horny just about all the time now. I'm not sure if all guys go through this or if I'm just hormonally imbalanced. I'unno; they say it's immature to act so rashly on impulses like lust, but... man. Ladies, if you don't have a p***s, don't even try to empathize or tell me you have it harder. Granted, you might what with menstrual cycles and all that jazz, but when there's an extra appendage either grinding against your thigh or snapping your pants open, just... goddamn. It's like I told my friend (who is a girl), take a cucumber, and douse it in maple syrup. Stick it in your pants and leave it there for an hour or two, and you'll have a basic idea of what it's like. I say cucumber because it was the only vegetable that came to mind at the time that was phallic; I'm not saying my p***s is that big like a porn star or anything. I MEAN. It's not miniscule either, but... yeah. --;

But that's enough about that. Let's focus on some more significant issues. It occurred to me the other night that I've been jobless for almost a year now. I can't tell you how depressing it is to have to keep asking for money from my parents[/]i. It really makes me feel like a little kid when I can't afford for myself to go out with my friends, or even eat at waffle house. Granted, I don't really have to worry about money when it comes to that, but it sure does make me feel guilty. It's like I stole it from them or something, y'know? At any rate, it's not like I haven't been looking. I've sent applications flying in every which way, and haven't gotten responses on any. I suspect I've been too honest about it, in that I'm not good at communicating with people. Alas, yes, I am flawed; in my timid nature, I have this thing about if I say anything productive, I'll end up offending someone in general hearing distance. I have a feeling it's because I'm white... cc; I just don't want to go into a job that won't get me anywhere. I want a future, damnit. I've tried to get a data entry clerk (typing stuff off papers onto microsoft word) job, but the applications were all filled for that when I applied. Sucks to be me. I have a thing on Monster to keep me motivated, but it's not going smoothly at the moment. Every other day or something, it sends me an E-mail about new job oppurtunities, but it keeps showing me these jobs I already reviewed that I don't want. I have two resumes set up for people to look at: one for graphics design, and one for an office temp job. In the graphic design one, there's been this constant job offer for something in sports.
...
You should know something about me. I hate sports. D< Physical activity burdens me in general when it involves a ball of some kind. Whoever gets hyped/upset/emotional about a ******** piece of rubber with air in it should cut out the middle man and kill themselves. It's really not that great; these days, people don't even go to a pep rally or something to watch the game; they go to get wasted/high/laid.

Anyway, back on track, I haven't gotten any major oppurtunities from the office temp part yet, but I'm crossing my fingers. In the meanwhile, I'm still looking for a meager job in doing some kind of physical labor or something. I really like doing that, since it really helps me work out... keeps me focused... and helps me sleep at night. It wouldn't be much, and it sure as hell wouldn't ensure a future (YOU LIE, TELEVISION!), but it's money in my pocket, right? In fact, I was going to work at Graeter's Ice Cream (guess what they sell), but then I found out my little crackhead sister is going to work there. I'd rather not, especially including that I'd be working with my best friend's girlfriend. Temptation? I hope not.

Speaking of temptation, let's shift gears again. Let's talk about love, and my complete ignorance of it's definition. They tell me you have to find for yourself what love means to you, and... I gotta tell you, people, it's a lot harder than it sounds. For four or five years now, I've been pining over my ex ever since we broke up. She's been dating off and on with some cat who can't please her sexually (I can?). Now and again, we'll mess around just because she's horny, but that's about it. We hardly ever talk anymore, especially of late. I was usually the one to start a conversation with her over MSN or something, but I realized a short time ago that I don't love her, I just like the hanky panky. I know, slow learner, right? Anyway, it's gotten so she's not even online anymore, which leads me to believe she just blocked me, and has no interest in associating with me. If there's ever been a kick to the nuts that send the gonads into the throat, that would have been my version. After all this time of sending her presents and helping her out with her problems (completely ignoring my own and instead bitching to me about them), it all amounts to nothing, and I realize I've wasted a hefty amount of time.

You know who you are, goddamn woman.

I know, it's drama. Man, I hate drama. I theorized the other day, however, at KHU forums (a place I visit often to talk to people and review my graphics works), that chicks are prone to drama way more than guys. Surprisingly enough, many guys and chicks agreed with me. No matter how much you ladies try to avoid drama or detest it, you are more attracted to it than guys. Doesn't matter really gender-wise, as most drama is bred from petty squabbles and childish acting out. Like my parents; whenever they argue, all I can think of is crying toddlers fighting over a rubber ducky (rubber duckies are relevant to my interests... Club Stripes, look it up).

So anyway, I've just about given up on this thing called love. For now, anyway. I know a human can't go without bonding; it's human nature... they HAVE to interact with others every now and again, or they'll have a complete mental shutdown. Don't believe me? Pay more attention when you walk down a street. Just for now, though, I don't even want to think about it. I just recorded it here and recollected my thoughts to let you guys know and possibly get some sympathy... perhaps a hug. What I've known to be quote-unquote love is more lust than anything, and that's very troubling for me. Just when I thought I was getting a grasp of affectionates and loving and junk, it slips through my fingertips. Instead of avoiding either, I've been appreciating the lust part more and more, just keeping myself in check whenever I feel the notion of affection for someone. Call me confused.

Aaaanyway, that's enough about all that melodramatic sheeeit. I'm not interested. What I am interested in is movies right now. First off, went to see Spiderman 3 the day it came out; not enough of a nerd to see the midnight showing. For months, ever since I saw Topher laced in Symbiote, I was geeking out about it. When it premiered, and as I left the movie theater, I had some thoughts about it. First off, Peter's emo hair? Wtf were they thinking? Not to mention the theme music that went to his showboating funk moves during his relapse montage. I've never seen anything so ridiculous from a comic book movie (okay, maybe somewhere in Hulk). And Sandman... he didn't have to be in the movie at all. In fact, it would've felt so less cluttered if he wasn't. All he was really present for was stupid closure for Peter and his angst over his uncle. Here's a spoiler: PETER NEVER GETS OVER IT IN THE COMICS. LEAVE IT BE. I like how they set up for possibly another sequel at least, what with Doc Connors having some of the Symbiote with him even after Peter killed Venom (which was stupid, you don't kill Venom)... I'm hoping for maybe Lizard or Carnage the next time around. Finally, Venom. Mygod, Topher actually pulled it off. I was thinking when Topher was first cast for it (ERIC F-ING FOREMAN), he would just bastardize and ruin it. I know, he's not the big buff guy from the old comics, he's based off the Ultimate Eddie Brock. All the same, he actually did okay. They beefed him up some (especially when he was Venom, rawr). My only real problem was the lack of the third person thing... that's part of Venom's persona, fergossakes. While there was also a severe lacking of tongue action, I can deal with that. It could have been better, but I'm certainly not complaining. Harry could've been better, but the first battle in the alleyway? That was pretty pimp. Aside from Harry's stupid paintball mask... why the hell didn't he wear the silver Goblin mask? It was there in the stock hold thing just collecting dust, and would've been so much cooler. Ah well, whatever. NOW for my favorite two lines from the movie:
Waitress: "How's the pie?"
Harry: "SOOO Goood."

Another movie I'm having mixed feelings about is the next Fantastic Four. The day I saw the preview first, I freaked out at how cool they made the Silver Surfer. It was just awesome to see, and the CGI was stunning, much more so than in the last. But therein lies my problem; the last one SUCKED. It had some rare moments of quality, but it mostly deserved whatever bad reviews it got. I'm having high hopes though, 'cause it's Silver Surfer, would-be ambassador for Galactus The Planet-Eater. I mean, COME ON. I just hope they don't screw it up like in X-men 3, and only show his head or something. They can't have Silver Surfer without Galactus, that's just not right. And then there's the whole thing about this generation screwing up the Fantastic Four. Granted, they were never that great to begin with, but come on. There's a decent chance they'll screw up the plot somehow, and ruin even the general presence of the Surfer. And by god, if they KILL him off, I'm going to shoot someone. Surfer doesn't die. He just doesn't.

Finally, and my biggest interest, Transformers. Saw the most recent trailer recently... and ohman. It keeps looking better and better. I was put off by the re-designs at first, making the robots look nothing like the originals at all-- and Optimus' stupid-a** flame decals-- but it's growing on me. It could actually work. While I've never been a fan of the human element in a Transformers gig, it could actually work with that one kid in it (god I keep forgetting his name). Seriously, I don't think they can screw this one up too terribly. Even if some fanboys and movie geeks (********) will be upset, I think it's going to amount a healthy sum of moneys easy. The sheer presence of a Transformer is starting to make me giddy with delight. My biggest concern is Optimus' voted line. Let me elaborate: some time ago, on the movie's main site, there was a poll about some special line Optimus should say in the movie. There was some old quotes from back in the day like 'transform and roll out' or 'something-something no matter the cost', and that would've been fine and dandy... if not a bit mundane. But no, they had to add to the poll 'do a barrel roll'. Naturally, all the retards of the internet grab onto that stupid 'do a barrel roll!' joke. That got the majority of votes, surprise surprise. I really don't even see how they can get Optimus to say that without sounding stupid, or even the right time for him to say it. Seriously, the only oppurtune time I could think of would be him kicking some kind of a** on Starscream.

Btw, spoiler: Bumblebee gets his a** handed to him by the three-times-as-big Megatron. i hope the ******** dies. D<

Anyway, that's about it for now. More entries later.






User Comments: [2] [add]
Cherabreena
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Sat Jun 21, 2008 @ 05:48pm
I have no idea, whatsoever, how I ended up in your journal, and I have no idea why I just read the ENTIRE content of this entry...

... be it because, I find myself in a similar situation as you were when you wrote this?
I need a job as well, aaaand..

The love thing. I've tried it, it was THE BEST yeeet I grew jealous and possessive, and he got tired of me. Eight months, I tell you, down the drain!
So eventually I told him that I was going to delete every contact with him, for my own good.
(Of course I kept it somewhere locked away... just in case... I dunno.)

Anyways, talk about meeting the exes AFTER cutting them off.
It's horrible! Oh Lord Dear!
- But neh... I'm Drama personified, I suppose.

I don't know... why I'm commenting this entry, but now I'm leaving. >_<


.IT'S A TRUISM THAT WRITING SOMETHING NASTY IS A WAY OF KEEPING NICE.
commentCommented on: Wed Sep 03, 2008 @ 03:40pm
Geeez. Your journal entries are lengthy.

Well, I can say that I know how you feel on just about every topic. (Transformers notwithstanding, need to see it first.)

I broke up with my ex a few months back. And now I never see her on MSN. I'm thinking she blok'd me as well. Well, that's 2 years I'll never get back. lol.



Kisai Ehrlange
Community Member
User Comments: [2] [add]
 
 
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