[META PRP] Sailing A Stormy Sea (Eridia Chiara)

[Micillia]

After Eridia leaves Panili's hive Chiara tracks her down to clear things up.

 

[Micillia]

Chiara sat in Panili's hive and tried to hold in a large sigh. Eridia had just said her part and walked out of the hive. Or, was escorted, it was a little unclear on that part. The blueblood knew when she told the purpleblood about this meeting thing there was the chance Eridia would show up and have her fun. Chiara kept looking at the hive door as the meeting continued, but the blueblood was having trouble paying attention. Chiara shook herself, and focused her attention on what the others were saying, this was an opportunity to get information. Information was power, didn't Eridia know that? Well, either way, Chiara would not get herself exiled from the meeting, instead she would do her part and spy. Eridia could find out the information these trolls were gathering from her.

~~~~~

Finally the meeting was over and trolls were slowly exiting the hive. Chiara waited the appropriately polite amount of time, then excused herself. It didn't take the blueblood long to find the exiled purpleblood sulking somewhere. Chiara got her sighs out of the way and walked up to Eridia. "Eridia." Chiara started, hiding her irritation with a smile. She knew what the self centered purpleblood was thinking. She was assuming Chiara abandoned her, didn't have her back, yada yada. For once, Chiara was not looking forward to Eridia over dramatizing the situation. "I really admire that dedication you have to your bloodpumper. Its always been impressive." Chiara said earnestly. It was true, Eridia might lie and play games, but when there was something that really struck the purpleblood's bloodpumber, she was unmovable. "Just because im not joining you, doesn't mean i don't agree, but wouldn't it be nice to have a set of eyes and ears on the inside?"

ImaginationsParadise

 

[ImaginationsParadise]

Eridia didn't know how much time she'd spent outside, but if she was to guess based on her observations, she spent about 30 minutes. When she heard the meeting was over, she moved not so far from the orangeblood's hive as she expected to go back and face them again. So there she sat as she waited, sulking at the fact that they kicked her out. Her, a sophisticated highblood. Of all rude things she had ever witness, this was by far the worst. Once she heard her name called out, she looked up just to see Chiara. Her saddened face changed as she her the blueblood speak. Admiration, did she really felt that? That seemed like the only thing Chiara felt towards her and that sucked, knowing it was probably fake sucked. She scoffed at her comment and didn't look at her. Instead Eridia paid attention at the rocky scenery before them. "Yeah, right I'm too dedicated. Thanks for pointing that out pal.

Eridia was short-tempered, which always brought in the worst of people and ruined most of her relationships. It was sad to know that this, whatever "friendship" they might have had, would end tonight. Lovedad warned her multiple times, he told her this would not work out, he told her and she ignored his warnings. Same thing he did with the others, who've disappeared from her life, who've played her. "Where were you?" She snapped. The rage inside her grew stronger as she spoke."Ah yes, you were socializing with your new friends. Pardon if I was oblivious to that."

Was getting information all she could think of? Was that all there was to their relationship? "It's not a matter of joining me or not, or having someone in the inside. You made your priorities crystal clear Chiara. Fun always comes first right?" The highblood stood up to face her. "Well aren't I a sad sight? This just proves once again that I, Eridia Tsifer, am a nobody." Her voice cracked and her eyes were watery. "I am no good... I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned. While the other party celebrates my misery when I drown in self-rejection."

"I don't even know why you're here, shouldn't you be digging out more information from them? That's what you normally do, isn't it?" She sat back down on the pile of rocks. "That's the only thing you do best..." She muttered loud enough for her to hear.

Micillia

where were u gurl when i needed u?

 

[Micillia]

Chiara gritted her teeth. Why was she always assuming Chiara was lying about her feelings. Did Chiara really act like she wasn't on the purpleblood's side? Eridia was one of the only trolls Chiara felt like she could be something other than the masks she hid behind. Chiara thought back to the last exchange she had had with Lutrin, and internally winced. The blueblood tried to be herself, and look what happened. Lutrin hated real Chiara. Maybe real Chiara just wasn't likeable at all. The blueblood pushed that thought away, that was the road to a slippery slope. "ERIDIA" Chiara barked, pushing all the depressing thoughts away. "Do you remember the masked ball? Do you remember how we essentially scoffed in the Queen's face, trying to frame her favored general? Not to mention the deceleration of war with that seadweller!"

Chiara's hand balled up in a fist, and she took a breath to calm down. "I vowed i would join you, because we both have a dream Eridia, a dream for power, sure, but also a better place. This whole planet and its "royalty" suck. And we are on a dangerous path." Chiara stepped closer to the purpleblood. "But we are on that path together. And we have threats to our lives together."

Chiara looked away from Eridia, trying not to blush as she opened up, real feelings were not something she liked showing. The mask, the lies, the fun, it was all so much easier. "And we are gonna need all the tricks, info, and secrets we can get." Chiara finally stopped avoiding Eridia's eyes. "Cuz all we have is each-other. And i wanna make sure there is a tomorrow for both of us."

ImaginationsParadise

 

[ImaginationsParadise]

"I. Don't. WANT. To remember!" She yelled back. Why did everyone had to mention the ball? She didn't on purpose, Eridia was sure of that. "I don't wish to remember that at all! And if I were to look back on that event, all I remember is that you ABANDONED ME BACK THEN AS WELL! LIKE EVERYONE ELSE DID!"

Eridia was lonely and she tried to live with it. She was lonely in some horribly deep way and for a flash of an instant, the highblood saw just how lonely, and just how deep the feeling ran. Even if she surrounded herself with plenty of trolls, not everyone would lift that feeling. She didn't know why, she didn't know how Gerard managed to fill her gaps and how her obsession managed to make everyone else emphasize the feeling of isolation. The worst kind of pain happened when your soul wept and no matter what you did, there was no way to comfort it. A section withered and became a scar on the part of your soul that survived.

The falsities, the games, the cold desires... all that made her suffer, the false desires and fears, the false values and ideas, the false relationships between people. Eridia didn't want that from someone so close, all Eridia wanted was someone she could rely on-- someone who could bring the best out of her. Sadly the one who'd made her feel like she could be something good was gone now. She looked at the blueblood really hurt. She felt really hurt by everyone's intentions. The teen couldn't help but let her tears run down her cheeks. She cried in front of Chiara, something she didn't want to do. She felt frustrated, she knew that no matter what she did, no matter how many facades she pulled, she could never stop feeling so empty... and she couldn't attempt anything to change her situation. As everyone would suspect her true intentions even more.

It was easier for her to be hated, to be the bad guy as it made others honestly, than to be loved or the hero and be lied and judged when she made a mistake. It was better in the long run-- but so hurtful.

"Do you even know what I want? What I'm pursuing besides our little game?" Eridia sobbed. "Do you even know how it feels to be surrounded by nothing but false words and hidden intentions? Stress, pain, loneliness... do you know that?" She cried out. No matter how hard she tried or how bad the highblood wanted to, she couldn't change anything about the pain-- it just stayed in place.

"I--" She gulped. "I don't even know if I want to reach that tomorrow. I'm not looking forward for it anymore..."

"You vowed yes, and you've stuck around long enough by my side. But sometimes it feels as if we are just half-assed allies that could turn on each other at anytime... nothing more."

Micillia

 

[Micillia]

Chiara crossed her arms and looked away from Eridia. "You really think i would turn on you?!" Chiara said. Eridia was crying, the blueblood knew she should comfort her friend and make the purpleblood feel better, but, Eridia's words were like knives in her heart. "Or are you trying to tell me your going to turn on me?"

Chiara looked down at the grassy ground, trying hard to keep her own tears in. So that was it, huh? The only "friends" Chiara could have were people that actually hated her. Zindel obviously wanted Chiara dead, Lutrin was finally smartening up, and Chiara's last conversation with the brownblood was stressed and tense. Not to mention how Zariah had beaten her when she was just being herself. All she had were chains forcibly connecting her to others. No one wanted to ever be near her or be her friend.

Eridia didn't even want Chiara.

Chiara clenched her fist, and inhaled shakily. She would not cry. She couldn't afford to look weak, ever. She wasn't a highblood like Eridia, she was just another blueblood trash, like all the other bluebloods Chiara hated. Kursha, Lorata, probably the Queen too, would just love to take her down, end the misery of having to even interact with Chiara. Really this was the smartest move for the purpleblood. Chiara had made a habit of getting under the skin of powerful trolls.

Chiara finally let go of the breath she had been holding."Yeah, okay. I understand." The way to protect Eridia was to leave her. Chiara felt the hard rock in her chest grow, the dead part of her that formed when her own lusus left her. Chiara finally raised her head to look at Eridia, a crazed, forced smile on her face. "You can get everything you need without some s**t blueblood dragging you down, especially not some suicidal one that picks fights with seadwellers, huh?" Chiara laughed insanely. She had stuck by Eridia's side, but what did Eridia do when Chiara's life was threatened by Lorata? The purpleblood had been focusing on herself, there was no room in Eridia for Chiara.

Chiara could feel it consuming herself, some feeling of suicidal insanity. How many times had she had to bend over backwards to make Eridia feel better? To feel wanted? With that the blueblood turned around, she wanted nothing more than to leave. Just what Eridia wanted her to do, right?

ImaginationsParadise

 

[ImaginationsParadise]

"Pretty sure you will! The moment I stop being interesting, you'll toss me away like a used napkin!" She shouted. "As if you haven't done that before!" In reality they were at the same level. Both were probably bad influences and both were probably hated by others at a similar degree. Neither couldn't see that, even if it was pretty obvious. No... I wouldn't. Eridia thought.

The highblood wouldn't betray Chiara, at least she thought she wouldn't. She might have forgiven her negligence, Eridia might have tried to. But turning her back on her, as if she was leaving her once more... No. She wouldn't allow it. Roughly she wiped her tears away, not minding that she ruined her make up and maintained her eye contact. This was blowing out of proportions, and Eridia felt... glad. She loved the thrill, the chased... she wanted others to die for her, to fawn over her and Chiara hadn't given what she wanted-- at least not her true self. Was that her? Was that troll maniacally smiling at her Chiara? Eridia could feel her own sanity slipping away as the blueblood laughed. She was leaving her, she was walking away. Eridia lowered her head, smiling insanely at the sound of the ground crunch as Chiara walked away. Now, was she starting to see and hear things? No one knew. Time changed people and things also changed. Friends left as soon as their illusions shattered.

"What if I did?" She chuckled bitterly as more tears dropped. "I do have all the luxuries a troll could possibly dream of. WOOOOW, I SURELY LIVE A PERFECT PURPLEBLOODED LIFE, AM I RIGHT? NEWSFLAAAASH, I AM NOTHING BUT A SHEILD, SOME SORT OF PROTECTION FOR YOU! AS YOU CAN HIDE BEHIND ME AND DO YOUR DIRTY WORK!" Eridia felt a pang on her chest. Lovedad warned her about that. "SO SAD, KNOWING LOVEDAD WAS RIGHT AFTER ALL THESE SWEEPS!"

"OH MY GOODNESS!" Eridia clutched her chest and looked back at her. She couldn't help but exclaim again and do a dramatic twirl while she twistedly laughed. "Isn't it amazing Chiara? This feeling of helplessness, this feeling of knowing you can only truly rely on yourself... Painful isn't it? You don't know HALF OF IT. I EXPERIENCE THIS ON A NIGHTLY BASIS, WATCHING YOU ALL TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME... USING ME... eheh... that's all I'm good for... YOU... " She panted.

"YOU ARE ATTACHED TO THE BENEFITS I BRIIIING YOU, NOT ATTACHED TO ME IN THE WAY A MORAIL IS!"

"Leaving you Chiara... It is so hard sometimes... Heh.. AHahahaha.... to leave you-- IMPOSSIBLE! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT ME TO SAY? THAT I CAN'T LEAVE YOU UNTIL YOU LEAVE ME?" Oh the emotional ride she was on right now. But as insane as she was, she was speaking the truth. There were times when the mind deals life's blows by turning itself insane. While this may not seem beneficial, it is. There are times when reality is nothing but pain, and to escape that pain the mind must leave reality behind.

"Go ahead... I DARE you to leave once more. I DARE YOU, YOU ******** PIECE OF UNRELIABLE s**t! I MUST TELL YOU THE TRUTH ME DEAR, BEFORE YOU MAKE YOUR CHOICE AHAHAHAHA!" She was seeing things behind teary eyes. There were two roads not taken. A quaint and well kept one that would solve their issues, that contained everything she had fantasized about, one with the Chiara she had probably made up inside her head-- that had bewitched her all these years. The other, was twisted, muddy, disastrous with an air that kissed her quite insane, and would only make matters worst. Which one did Eridia take? I think I made you up inside my head didn't I Chiaraaaa?

"LEAVING YOU... IS THE EASIEST GOGDAMNED THING IN THE WORLD!" Now this, this was a lie. She knew she was attached to Chiara in some way.

Go ahead... She thought. LEAVE ME LIKE THE REST. AFTER ALL, YOU ARE BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME!

Micillia

 

[Micillia]

Chiara had turned to leave. She wanted to leave, but the purpleblood's manic laugh stopped her feet. She clenched her jaw in the smile, the not quite right smile, and turned to the purpleblood. She put her hand on her hip and just looked at Eridia as the girl seemed to break herself. The blueblood heard the words and knew they would kill her later. "LEAVING YOU... IS THE EASIEST GOGDAMNED THING IN THE WORLD!" But the blueblood felt nothing at the moment. No pang of pain, no sadness, or even anger. It was like she wasn't really there in that field.

Chiara couldn't help but just find the entire thing funny. She had signed her life off to this person, this unwell, unsafe, untrustworthy troll. The blueblood broke down laughing. The laugh was harsh, and not altogether even laughing. "Then leave me." Chiara whispered, "But im gonna add that pretty little head of yours to my mantle collection." The blueblood pulled out her weapons. "Itll look so good next to Indica's empty, lifeless skull."

Shipwreck

ImaginationsParadise