[PRP] In The Dark (Melvin/Jan)

[MoonKitsune]

When he left Horace's room, he went to find Jan but found he wasn't home. He checked the Infirmary, laundry room, and kitchens to no avail. He returned to bring Horace something to eat and left a text message for Jan.

Quote:

Text to Jan:
Can we talk?

He bately slept and woke up early to tend to the greenhouse and go for a swim. He checked his messages constantly and returned to Jan's room every hour. When he went to the Infirmary to see if Jan was in the work roster, a tech told him the news.

Jan was hurt.

Panic flooded his system in a quick, electric jolt and he shoved the clipboard aside to go to his room. He didn't knock softly but barged in, looking eildly about the room.

"Jan?!"

 

[Baneful]

Lawrence had received the text and intentionally ignored it, so when Melvin showed up at the infirmary regardless, he felt he had someone else's good nature to thank.

"I am here Melvin." he said. "I am quite all right." And for the most part he did look all right, other than the shadows under his eyes and the fading bruise on his head. "Don't worry."

 

[MoonKitsune]

He moved to Jan's side, not tearing his eyes off him as he reached blindly for a chair and pulled it over. He did not sit though.

"What happened?"  

[Baneful]

"I was worried about America. I went to visit her, there was a bit of a scuffle. I got injured and now I am rather ill I'm afraid. I should be fine in a day or so they tell me." He smiled. "I am glad you came regardless though."

 

[MoonKitsune]

Finally he lowered him and sat down, covering his face with hisbhands and taking deep breathes to calm himself.

Dropping his hands, he looked at his lap. "Horace was beaten up by her. They got into a fight too. He said you two got into a fight. Now he looks like a mess and you?"

Looking up, he rose to touch Jan's hand. "What is going on? Why is America and you two fighting? Why was it America who found Horace and sent you to the pod? What is going on?"

He didn't want to be pushed to the side of a personal issue when Rin, Jan, and Horace were all involved. They were his world and his world was being attacked. He couldn't just stand and let it repeat again and again.  

[Baneful]

"There is a long and convoluted history regarding her I am afraid. Horace is jealous of her or something of that sort because once upon a time I slept with her. He seems to think this means that I love her rather than the intense dislike which I actually bear her. Getting himself beaten up was not a wise choice, but he gets very wrapped up in his emotions, I can't imagine what he felt he had to tell her."

He sighed, long and exasperated, fidgeted and then immediately decided not to do it again. "I ended up in a fight with her because well, she had started coming to my room uninvited, it was not acceptable. The pod was because she is a meddler and will do absolutely anything within her power to make my life more difficult, she knew it would make me look bad, so she did it. It is as simple as that."

Shaking his head he added. "She is just obsessed with me, it is quite, quite tragic."

 

[MoonKitsune]

"Well Hirace is beating himself up over it. He said that she came in when he was there and solicited you for sex. He's..." And to this Melvin settled a bit more. "... He loves you a lot. He'd do anything for you - and feels overshadowed. I don't think he hears it enough that you love him back. He - actually said you told him you can't love at all."

He looked back at Jan. "He didn't make it sound like she was obsessed. He said you stalked her and were the obsessed one."

Moving closer, he leaned on the edge of the bed. "I want to get the story straight because - I can't let this keep happening. I don't know what is going on and all I feel is pissed off at Anerica for hurting the people most important to me."

 

[Baneful]

"She did." he said gravely. "In front of Horace no less, it was quite inappropriate I have to say." He smiled. "And yes, Horace is very devoted, I simply cannot stress enough to him how important he is in many ways, he gets so touchy about all of this and I admit I don't understand what the fuss is when I have tried time and time again to explain that he is worth my time." Inclining a brow he went on. "Oh yes, I did tell him that. He requested honesty and I explained that I do not think that I am capable of it but I would try. I have been trying but all of this is so very complicated."

"And I will be honest with you Melvin, I did do a bit of following her around at one point, but it wasn't stalking. She was a threat to me and I was concerned about the damage she might do to my reputation and to others so I kept an eye on her. She decided this was stalking and painted me in a bad light. She claims I injured her chest after pulling her outside the wards but it went two ways, you have no doubt noticed the scar on my neck, that was her. She was as much to blame in all of this as I."

He reached over to set his hand on Melvin's with a smile. "That is how many of us feel about America Melvin, but you must be the better man in all of this, do not let yourself be drawn into it. Horace and America have their problems, but you are clever and pure, Rin values your ability to keep your head and so do I. You are such a help to me and anything you ask me, you know I will always attempt to answer truthfully."

 

[MoonKitsune]

Cupping Jan's hand, he squeezed it and looked into his (their) eyes. "I don't want her hurting you two. I don't want her thinking she can go into your room. Look what happened when you tried to talk? What if she goes into your room and - " He paused thinking about it. "I know you are a strong man, but we're hunters and I've seen women with knoves go after men here. She pummeled the both of you. What am I suppose to do about that?"

He held Jan's hand, stroking the flesh. "I want you to just move in with me... But you're with Horace. I don't want to get in between you trying to be with him."

"I think what we did might destroy him. He loves you too much."

 

[Baneful]

"You needn't do anything about it Melvin, though I very much appreciate the intention and concern. There is nothing we can do without facing the backlash from superior officers who simply do not understand the situation. I want you to be safe, I need you to be safe." Melvin got a thoughtful look. "I hope she doesn't continue to invite herself in, I might need to get a lock."

Arching the hand into Melvin's touch he twisted it around to rub the other man's gloved finger between his index and thumb.

"I would love to move in with you you know." he said. It was a very nice room, a very nice and very clean room. "You are such a sensitive, careful soul, and your habits are impeccable."

Lawrence did raise a brow. "Destroy him? Isn't that a little dramatic now Melvin, he is devoted, he is in love, there is nothing that love cannot cushion and adapt to, otherwise it was not love in the first place, you know that. You've done whatever it takes to get Rin back and I am committed to helping you with that." he sighed. "I just. It's hard for me. I grow more attached to you by the day. I don't want you to stop."

 

[MoonKitsune]

His attention remained on their hands. "Love can destroy a person. If Rin left me, I wouldn't know what was left. It would feel worse if she decided to leave me for someone else, but I'd be happy she could be someone who could make her happy and protect her. But I know I would also hate loosing her and feel selfish for wanting her when I never deserved it."

"Horace feels different. If you left him, if he knew you were with someone, his world would b crushed. He loves you with every breath and only wants you to love him back. He isn't the type of person to share...or to forgive his best friend if he found out he was with his boyfriend."

His eyes rose to look at Jan. "I like being with you and I don't want to disregard your feelings either, as if you aren't as important and are just there for Rin. You have given so much for us and are a good person. I just - can't get inbetween you and Horace either. I wouldn't be a friend to him and if you are trying to love him, then I'll be getting in the way. I want to support Horace's wishes because Rin was the person who gave me the same faith to try loving again. To give me a chance to try."

 

[Baneful]

"Just because someone is hopelessly attached to you is no reason to surrender your own integrity Melvin. Horace might be completely and utterly attached to me, but he also in some ways projects his idea of what love should be onto me. I concede but it is not entirely loving me for me the way you say. The inability to forgive is also a fault, you do not have that, as you said you would wish the best for the one you loved and that is admirable, shunning one's best friend is not."

Moving his hand he stroked Melvin's jaw fondly with a fingertip. "I appreciate that you are thinking about Horace and that is also admirable, but what about you Melvin? Rin always said that you found it difficult to reach for what you really wanted and needed."

Falling silent, he looked away and let his hand fall. "Because I fear that I might have feelings for you too Melvin, and I do not want to have to choose when I simply don't know. Are you saying you won't even try to find out?"


 

[MoonKitsune]

His body leaned lightly into the touch, hungrier now than ever for the contact he had been starved for for weeks upon months at a time. It was warm and even warmer when he knew who was stirring inside that touch.

As it dropped, so did his stomach and he touched his jaw as he went quiet, the spot already growing colder.

"I want to find out... But it's hard to stand by Horace too when I'm doing this."

And he was here on a mission after all. "What do you feel for him? Do you feel as if you still could love him?"  

[Baneful]

"It is hard, I appreciate that. But your intentions for him are good right? You want the best for him, that is a simple fact, it does not make you a bad friend that you are doing this one tiny thing he might not understand. He will never actually know, and if he does learn, we will introduce it carefully because we respect him so much."

He leaned back against the pillow and closed his eyes. "I do not understand my own emotions entirely Melvin, they are complex and difficult. I value him, that much I know, he is a very loyal and loving person. But I do not know if I could, or if I can, all I could do was say I would try, and trying I am. Wether or not it will work I cannot realistically say."

Taking hold of Melvin's hand again, he squeezed it. "I worry that he is starting to lose trust in me over all this America meddling. I am glad that you are still honest and true."

 

[MoonKitsune]

He felt guilty. He felt bad for wanting this, and yet Jan wanting it too made it feel better. Jan had been similar to him, not wanting a relationship at first but growing to need it. He could understand Jan's viewpoint of being limited in certain aspect of love and trying his best, and he could understand Horace's position of wanting nothing more than the person you loved to be there and yet somehow not matching their ideal. And yet came the question of what Jan asked- what did he want?

"All I want is for Rin to be happy. For you two to be safe. That's all I want." Because he deserved nothing else.

He leaned down, hovering a moment so his lips barely touched Jan's. He hadn't showered or broached his teeth, and yet his hunger pressed upon him just risk the barest warmth from Jan.

Reaching down, he pulled up the sheet and kissed through it to Jan's lips. "Promise me - not to go to America alone anymore. Let me come with you. Call me if she starts anything. Get me - just..." He pulled the sheet down and clutched it between his hands. "Let me be there."