[PRP] Maebe, Baby, Oh~ (Maebe & Shiloh)

[mare]

“Maeeeeebeeeee, baaaaaby, please let me in.”

He was in the doghouse, and for good reason. His presence had been scare and as a best friend, such a thing was unacceptable, deplorable even. So he was pawing at her door, his tail tucked between his legs and big brown eyes begging her to open the door. In his arms was a pile of things, chocolate, nail polish, a grab bag of goodies he’d picked out just for her – a peace offering, ultimately. If she didn’t let him in, he’d leave it by her door but being Shiloh, he wasn’t about to give up anytime soon.


“MAAAAAAEEEEEEEEBBBEEEEEEEEEEE.”

Nio Love

 

[Nio Love]

The sound of his voice was piercing through her, almost as if it was part of a dream. But she knew he was real, because he was active on Twitter again, and besides - he wasn't the only missing mother ******** to suddenly show up in her life.

She'd taken it in stride. She acted as if she hadn't missed him, as if she hadn't suffered without him. She acted as if his presence was just a good thing, not a great thing, and her performance was flawless.

But she'd just returned from getting her heart torn apart just by being near Otto again, and from thinking about how she was destroying Cami. When he called for her, she was in tears, sobbing openly on her bed. She shouldn't have said anything on Twitter; she should have just acted like she wasn't there.

But she was. And she had to sober up, because if she turned him away now, and he disappeared again--

"Hold on, idiot." She called out, sitting up and wiping the tears out of her eyes. She looked in the mirror, and waited for some of the redness to fade from her eyes, before finally opening the door and letting him in.

"Ew. Who are you again?" She teased, clearly unable to actually hide the fact that she was crying.

pyono

 

[mare]

He had been oblivious, almost purposely so. He’d so carefully erected blinders to protect himself, to protect the careful world he’d constructed amidst the chaos, as if could stop everything from falling to pieces by avoiding everything. There were no monsters under the bed so long as you ran and jumped under the covers, not looking back.

For as good as a friend, a lover, a person, that he thought he was, he wasn’t. He’d been sorely lacking for a long time and it was only the saintly natures of his friends that saved his a**, that was the reason he still had any friends to call on at all. He hadn’t deliberately hurt anyone but absence was as sharp as any knife, the edge of it turning inward, as he’d read Maebe’s message, his brow tightening with worry.

He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t hesitated, if he hadn’t thought for a split second that he could just keep pretending that things were okay and that Maebe would be okay because of it. But he couldn’t pretend her reaching out to him wasn’t there, couldn’t pretend that he was in any sense okay the thought of leaving her to put on that strong face of hers. It was one thing to do it to himself yet entirely unacceptable when it came to those he cared about.

Which, as it were, had become a surprisingly small amount on the island. He felt like a stranger.

He almost felt that way, standing at Maebe’s door, the pause before her voice rang out and his entirety immediately softened, resting against the door before she opened it up.

She opened it up. If nothing else, she’d opened up and when he saw her tear-stained face it was all he could do to blink back the tears himself and he swopped her up into his arms, into the tightest of hugs as he pulled the door shut behind them.

“Special mail-order delivery,” he quipped lightly, pressing his face against her blonde waves. “Heard you needed a best friend.”

Nio Love

 

[Nio Love]

She let out a strangled scream when he wrapped his arms around her, and her face scrunched up with annoyance even as she realized she had just burst into tears again. He always had that effect on her, no matter how much time had passed.

"Jesus, take it back, take it back." She begged, the laughter in her sobbing voice punctuating every syllable. "Return to sender. No way would I have ever ordered something as cheesy as that greeting." She wiggled her arms out of the choke hold he'd managed on her body, and let them fall like feathers around him, patting the shoulders they settled on awkwardly.

"God, someone's going to see this bullshit, hold on a second-" He wasn't letting go, and she had to awkwardly shimmy with a latched on Shiloh, until she could reach the edge of her doorway and slam the door shut. She rested her arm back around him, and then smushed her face against his hair. (It was just to use it to soak up the tears. Really.)

"You still smell like gay." She whispered, with a voice that sounded like she'd just said I love you.

pyono

 

[mare]

“No way,” he said, half sobbing, half laughing. “If you’re going for the Oscar, so am I. Cry it all out, I’m here Maebe baby.”

Her untangling of limbs and awkward patting only seemed to make him hug her harder, Shiloh being nothing if not persistent, especially when it came to hugs, and when it came to Maebe.

“Let the see, let them look,” he cried over-dramatically but moved just enough that she could shut the door because there was a sense of privacy to the moment and he didn’t want anyone interrupting. There were so many things he needed to say and apologies he needed to make but he did his best to say it all with a squeeze of his arms.

“I thought I was supposed to be the sassy gay friend, Maebs.”

The tone of his voice answered, I love you too.

He nudged her over, pulling her through her own room and flopping down onto her bed. It’d been a while, too long since he’d done this, sprawling out and hogging her blankets and general making a mess.

“And thank you, I try. I’m thinking of starting my own perfume line, what do you think?”

Nio Love

 

[Nio Love]

"Eau de Butt Pirate." She flopped helplessly on top of him, turning into a mushy pile of limbs and hugs and lazy people. "Nobody on Deus would buy it. It's already in the air." She rolled off of him, and sunk into her pile of plushies happily. There had been many additions, the usual suspects. A big plushie easter rabbit. A giant pink bear. A brown seal looking plushie with a hat too big to be meant for it, and the word 'Supreme' written on it's face.

"Okay. Enough foreplay. Give it to me already." She punched him in the stomach. "Where the hell have you been? And why haven't you been answering your phone? And do I need to kill somebody for keeping you away? Because I'm not completely against the idea."

pyono

 

[mare]

He wrinkled his nose at her, “That’s disgusting. Right up there with poo-pourri.”

That said, her room smelled familiar and comfortable and he let himself sink next to her amid the pillows and plush toys. He had intended to close his eyes and take it all in, a moment of peaceful bliss but a fist to the stomach made short work of any sort of rest and relaxation.

“Oomph,” he groaned, curling into a partial fetal position. “Have you been working out? God, hit someone who can handle it. If that’s your idea of foreplay, I’m just…”

Lifting the giant pink bear, he pushed it against her face.

“No killing necessary. I’ve just been busy.”

The answer sounded flat, and he knew it sucked as soon as it left his lips. But there wasn't much else to tell, not really. Maybe he’d pushed himself too much trying to please everyone, to be someone that everyone would like, that it had been too much. He’d failed, in any respect and in the end, he wasn’t sure why he’d sought the respect of people who’d rather him dead anyway. Deus was crass, it was wild, and he absolutely didn’t understand it.

He’d pulled away, into the quiet of deskwork and a fiancé waiting for him at home. It hadn’t been his intention to ignore Maebe, but every “oh, I’ll text her back in a minute” had minutes turning to hours, then to days and longer. As much as he loved her, she was a link to that world he didn’t understand, and he was afraid to face it.

Nio Love

 

[Nio Love]

She struggled against the suffocation via pink teddy bear, before finally giving in and going limp.

He'd been 'busy'. Maebe had lost her relationship, her sanity, her tether to life itself, and the only reason Shiloh could give her for his absence in her life was that he was busy. It wasn't enough, but she couldn't tell him that. She couldn't explain how much she'd needed him, and how he hadn't been there. She couldn't tell him anything, so she just let the bear kill her off quickly and quietly, the safest response to the answer.

That, and the silence.

pyono

 

[mare]

Nio Love

The silence was choking.

It was better than he deserved, to be honest. He almost wished she would yell at him, or punch him again, or say anything. Instead she stayed still and quiet beneath the bear and it took him a few moments to dig up the courage to pull the stuffed toy away, to look her in the face.

"I..." he started, but after a moment he closed his mouth. He didn't know himself what had really happened and he was still unsure now about the steps he needed to take but the longer they sat in silence, and he thought about it, the more he realized how selfish he was being. He wasn't here to find the answers to his own problems, he was here because Maebe had needed him, because she'd been calling and calling for him and he owed her at least the truth.

"You know I don't really fit in around here, right? I mean I've got you and Ian and stuff but I'm not... I'm not cut of the same stuff, you know, and well, I don't know, it's been a rough couple of months. Not that it - it doesn't make up for anything and I know I haven't been around and I'm so sorry, Maebs, I mean it, I'm just so sorry."

He flopped lower onto the bed, leaning against her and avoiding her eyes.

"I'm not the person I thought I was."  

[Nio Love]

When he pulled the stuffed animal away from her face, there was a sad child underneath it. Her eyes were wide, and unsure. She didn't know how to deal with the moment, or the fear that began to bubble up under her skin. Shiloh only made it worse when he tried to explain, because he said he was different and the world she was in did not work for him and - he wasn't the person he thought he was. He wasn't the person who'd chosen to be her best friend.

She had nothing to say to that, because she'd never felt so dumped in her entire life.

She reached over, very slowly, and picked up the bear. It gently lowered back down over her face, covering him and his entire existence from view.

This was not the reunion she'd been planning for.

pyono

 

[mare]

Nio Love

There was only more silence and when he dared to glance up, Maebe was hidden beneath the bear again, this time of her own volition. His heart squeezed in his chest unpleasantly.

"I'm not... I'm not a nice guy," he said softly, drawing back the hand he'd almost reached for her with. "I used to think that I could beat it all you know, that anyone could be a hero as long as they were strong and could keep a smile on their face."

Ashamed, he slid off the side of the bed, slumping against it as he folded his legs against the floor.

"I'm just a fraud. Sitting here talking about myself when you called me over. It's like word vomit, you know, I keep trying to think of the right thing to say but this, this s**t just keeps coming out and I don't even think, like, there are words that could make it better because in the end I ******** up. Maebe, I screwed up. Your my best ******** friend, and I still screwed it up."

The silence bore against him like a knife, it itched, it made him anxious. But what could he do, or say? He deserved this. He'd been stupid, and selfish, to think that he could come here and show his face after everything, to think that some hugging and laughter would fill the hole he'd left behind. He brought his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around them. He could give her space, he could go, but he didn't know where he could go. If... If he couldn't patch things up with Maebe, how could he face anyone? If he lost his best friend, how could he keep going?

The realization that hit him next hurt the most - this is what he'd done to her.  

[Nio Love]

From behind the bear, a startlingly quiet voice asked him the only question that mattered.

"Do you still love me?"

himehorse

 

[mare]

Nio Love

He sat up suddenly, in complete surprise.

"What, of course I do, Maebe! Of course I love you."

This time he did reach up, kicking himself for having been so oblivious. He reached up and he half draped himself over her and the bear, doing his best to squish them both as tight a hug as humanly possible.

"I never stopped loving you. You're my best friend."  

[Nio Love]

Squishing himself atop of her and the bear made her actually unable to breathe, and she quickly shoved the bear out of her face in order to stay alive during his testament of affection.

"If you loved me then why are you trying to kill me right now, help, 911, the gays want me dead, help."

Nevertheless, her arms eventually returned the favor, without quite as much gusto. She hugged him, and relished in the words, whether they sunk in or not.

"Then stop being a little t**t and act like it. Full time. Because without you, I fall apart, and that's not a good look on me." There, that seemed reasonable.

himehorse

 

[mare]

Nio Love

"Yes, I'm a secret service gaygent, sent to finish the job once and for all," he declared, resuming his hugging with all the gusto, whether she approved or not. He had a lot of hugs to make up for.

Listening to her words, he nodded, quiet and sobering for a moment as he leaned over the bear to look at her. There was still so much he wasn't sure of, that he needed to fix but he knew there were two constants he needed in his life, his fiance, and his best friend. He'd missed her, and he'd been, as she so aptly put, a little t**t. A big one, in fact.

"Understood," he said solemnly. "Now what is this about falling apart?"