The training was rough. She had known that it was going to be very different from her risky, reckless hunting trips. She hadn't quite realized the discipline it took to be a soldier. Her body ached all over, all the time. It had flooded her mind, distracting her from all thoughts other than training (and resting!). It a lot of ways it had been a blessing. She rarely had the time to say hi to Nyneve, let alone worry about the group on their way to the Pridelands.
Slowly, her endurance was growing. She felt like she wasn't as tired all the time, and wasn't as sore all the time, either. Her Duke and the Major training her didn't hold back. Rumi felt every blow dealt to her when she missed her commands, and it forced her to learn quicker. But blessed be the mountains, sometimes she just wanted to cry in frustration at her failures! Failure was everything in the beginning, and though she continued to mess up a lot, and lose sparring matches, and....well. At least she didn't lose as much as she had been, she reminded herself.
Would she have even won that spar against Tie Shi? She had quickly learned that she probably wouldn't have. At least she had been saved from that embarrassment. At least she was learning to be better for when he returned.
She was taking a moment's rest, having been given the rest of the night off. She'd be back at it in the morning. She trained about six days a week, and she normally enjoyed a little side hunting trip on her day off if she could. Though most of her training was endurance and fighting, she was beginning to go on patrols with other guards, learning what to look out for and how to keep the border signs maintained. It had to be obvious if someone was going to enter into the North, as foolish as that would ever be.
"Ugggh, I need a break!" she wandered towards a watering hole, intent on dipping her sore paws in the water and just...relaxing. Resting achy muscles and slowing her breathing. Letting her mind wander. Considering everything going on in her life, she felt like she deserved this little quiet solitary moment. She rarely had the time to be alone, let alone let herself meditate a bit.
"They've been gone a while," she mumbled to herself, flexing each toe as it dipped into the cool water. Her body was leaner than it had been, but she could tell what areas she needed to focus on. Now before the Duke figured it out, and pushed her even harder. The last thing she needed was for her muscles to crumble under her in the middle of a session.
"Well, it feels like a while. Has it really only been less than two weeks?" She sighed. "They probably haven't even made it to the Pridelands yet....his homelands..." Ugh. All those uncomfortable feelings were returning. Flashes of worry, jealous, envy, and other emotions she couldn't even put into words. It was difficult, trying to understand what Tie Shi may be feeling when returning to his homelands. She barely remembered her parents and siblings, let alone a homeland. She didn't think she had belonged to a pride before, nothing outside of the family unit that they moved in. She had gotten lost, so long ago. She knew in her heart that if she saw her family again, she probably wouldn't recognize them instantly. Tianxia...the North had been her home for so long. This was where home was. So would he feel the same?
He had made a promise; a duel. A test. She kept firm to the idea that he would honor it. There was no way that he could crawl up the ranks so fast as an outsider joining if he hadn't been honorable and true to his path. Would something like returning to his homelands shake that path he followed? Rumi didn't know enough about him to know, and so here she was. Worrying again.
"Ugh, stupid. You're still so hung up on this...why?" She'd never been like this with anyone before. And, well...there definitely isn't a short supply of elidgible bachelors roaming around in the North. She'd met him once and yet she just couldn't help herself. It put a lot of things in perspective for her, and made her a bit shamefaced for all the times she shamed Nyneve for crushing on her man. Rumi was going to have to apologize to her about that, even if she knew that the white lioness would only laugh it off. Nyneve was waiting for her prospective mate to return as well, and at least it gave them something else to bond over. Well. Sort of. Rumi wasn't certain of anything.
Rumi shifted one of her paws around in the water, watching the ripples disturb the surface. The moon was reflected, shivering as the ripples disturbed its clear reflection. The one action that Huo Wuyu started had driven her to this. What was to come after this? Would she be content to just be a solider? Hmmm....she turned that thought over on itself. If....if things worked out, would she be proud of only being a soldier if...if Tie Shi....
"Ugh!" She felt her face heat up with embarrassment as she slashed at the water's surface. Like hell she should let herself think so far in advance. She didn't even know if he would return! She growled, throwing herself back up to pace around. Her own wandering mind was going to doom her before anything began. It would cloud her judgement and her instructors would notice. They wouldn't ask questions, only push her harder to make her unable to think of anything but training.
Perhaps that's how it needed to be. She needed to not think of anything past the current day; she would take everything one small step at a time. One spar, one training, one (if possible) hunt. If he returned, then she would give herself permission to reconcile her feelings for him. For now, it was to focus on herself.
(1,026 words)