[PRP] Exact Measurements (Helmut & Horace)

[The Semblance of Unity]

Over the course of his short stay, Horace had gotten turned around no less than three times, although never completely lost. The hunter had, of course, read carefully what information was available on the school. There had been a generalized map; the organization would not send their hunters in blind. It was, however, woefully unspecific. Where the map had 'building, 3 stories', it did not mention the exact number of rooms, their exact locations or general purposes. It was not enough.

The Doctor was, sadly, no help. Memory loss was an unfortunate side effect of weaponization. Jannisari remembered things like the location of a dragon's major arteries, tidbits like gluttony demons were prone to high blood pressure, how many minutes it took for a gargoyle's skin to burn off. (Horace did not ask her how she knew that - and if he had asked, she would not have known.) Tapping the beaked nose of his mask, Horace wondered if there was anyway at all to get into the nearby town. Golems were fragile, but surely Life could think up something. The lairs too, with horsemen.... if a hunter could disguises himself there and learn a guard's pattern or how to navigate the sand-infested warrens... Preparation saved lives. Horace thought, maybe, that death could be a good division to be a part of. Jannisari hummed approval in his mind.

{if you make yourself useful, no one can replace us.}

.He headed slowly down the hallway, looking into the tiny windows on each door and making careful notes of anything interesting. There was really no reason not to have a completely detailed and accurate map on hand, not when it was so easy to blend in. Blinking he tried a doorknob at random, just to see if they kept things locked up tight. It turned easily.

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

Horace opened the door to a classroom that looked like any other classroom, aside from the fact it was fashionably dusty and cobwebbed. It looked like it hadn't been cleaned in aeons, or perhaps had been abandoned ages ago. However, that last point was clearly moot, as there was in fact someone there. A small someone sitting at a desk that was clearly too big for her. A white haired creature with grey skin who was wearing perhaps a few too many layers. She had not only given a surprised yelp at the sound of the door opening, but was now staring wide-eyed at the door from her desk.

Her pencil gave a loud snap, as she clutched it over her homework...but other than that she was very, very still, as if he wouldn't see her if she didn't make another move.

the semblance of unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

He jotted a quick note on his papers before scanning the room. It was filthy from disuse... or some standard of Amity fashion, Horace never was sure. A cracking noise caused his eyes to snap to the one occupant. He tensed, but she was small and not particularly threatening. Still, this place carried danger in tiny packages.

{What is she?}
{I am uncertain, horace. I am not a lexicon of species.}
{I bet you were once.}
{...it is entirely possible, although that is neither here not there.}

The Doctor sounded miffed, as though her memory loss was his fault rather than her own choice. He almost laughed out loud as he moved into the room, slowly, so that he did not startle her.

"Bit of a dreary room to hang out in, ain't it?"

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

Dreary? Helmut blinked around the room for a moment, but never moved her head much to actually look around. This stranger was still a stranger, and she didn't have anyone else to look towards if she somehow failed as a conversationalist, or if this person was mean like Li Shou.

"I...guess..." She agreed quietly, droopy eyes finally moving to focus on the desk in front of her, and the work book she had been writing in. The room always looked like this, but she assumed it was probably on purpose, because of the subject. The ghoul reached up to scratch her head, tiny black claws burying into unruly hair to scratch at the base of her small but still-growing antlers.

"Are you early for math too?" She inquired, perking up a little bit at the prospect.

the semblance of unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

"Math." His voice was deadpan. This room was regularly used? Horace made a weird face, the expression thankfully blocked by his plague doctor's mask. Belatedly realizing that, as a student, he should probably know this, he fumbled. "I, uh, am Horace-...ia. Horacia, a potential transfer. Are all classrooms in such disrepair?"

Horace moved around Helmut to peer interestedly at her workbook. Why would a monster need math? His own little notebook whipped out and he began taking small, neat notes.

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

"Disrepair?" She parroted almost stupidly, but made a little squeak as she realized he was looking in the vague direction of her notebook. He was looking at her notes. Her notes were messy! Her math was probably wrong! She hated math, it was terrible! She couldn't let him see! Nnnooooo~ As carefully as she could, she started leaning over her work, using her body to block it from view.

"ERM - N-no most classes look like this it's really normal....okay there are a couple clean ones but th-those are like...really weird and..." She trailed off with an unhappy chitter, her ears drooping as she laid her cheek on her notebook to stare woefully towards the ground. "pleasedon'tlookatmynotesi'mreallybadatmath..." she added quickly into one of her scarves.

Closing the workbook was a thought that clearly never occurred to her.

"A-AND UM--" She choked out in a panic, realizing she had forgotten something very important...except she kept her cheek on the desk, her arms draping over it so her small hands grabbed the front edge. "MY NAME IS Helmut Purge and I'm a second year and it's very nice to meet you." She said, her voice dropping mechanically, almost as if she had been coached to say it and subsequently rehearsed this exact line over and over. Once it was over she went quiet for a moment, tapping her claws against the old wood of the desk.

"Are you in a different school right now? Doesn't yours look like this too?" She went back to a subject that was much safer, and one that made her curious now that she had determined he was likely not going to predator eat her. Maybe.

The Semblance of Unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

This was normal? Ugh. He wanted to get out a duster and go to town, and Horace was not normally a clean-freak. He made a note. The way she comically lamented her lack of math skills was interesting, he thought. She was like a stray puppy. "Hello, Helmut. I can help you, if you wish? I ain't terrible at math." His fingers touched the workbook and gave it a tiny tug to see how much of her body weight rested on the page. Horace wanted to see everything in more detail.

"My, uh, school, is a little cleaner. The teachers find that attractive disrepair stops the learning process. It's a bit stuck-up, I guess. Lots of rules." {use as little detail as possible, horace. this is not a difficult thing to remember.} Horace could just imagine the Doctor, sitting somewhere where she could look down on him, lips thinning whenever he did something not good enough for her. Eventually, he supposed he'd get used to it. {do not get used to it. get better.} He almost reached up a hand to rub the bridge of his nose before remembering he was wearing a mask. Awkwardly, he stroked the beak of the mask; it was sort of an evil-beard stroke, he supposed. Good enough. Jannisari hissed in irritation.

"What's-" he said thoughtfully, -the best and worst parts of the school?"

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

"No, thank you" Helmut murmured sheepishly, letting out a very displeased whine as he tried to pull the book free. She put her whole weight on it, and even more than that, in an attempt to keep it hidden. He looked like a plague doctor, which meant he was probably really smart which meant - "Nnnnooooo, please no! It's really bad!" She wailed, getting louder with each syllable. Her panic made her overlook his comment about the school, and she would continue whining until he gave up on the venture.

Or, at least, until he started asking her about school.

"Oh. Um." It shut her up quickly, but she kept her cheek on the workbook just in case as she considered the question. "Corrividus Curseday is pretty good. There's lotsa different Corrividus' too choose from..." She mused, her eyes glossing over as she thought about food. It took her a moment to remember that there was a second part of his question. Then, suddenly, Helmut stared at him for the first time, no longer avoiding eye contact as she gave her very serious answer for the worst part:

"When the creepteria is closed."

the semblance of unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

"Well, because I am good at math, you could let me assist you." Seeing that she did not feel like budging, he sighed and scribbled something in his book. Corrividus Curseday? What the ******** was that? Horace made another neat note in his book. Corividae were crows, ravens, magpies, and jackdaws... He chalked it up to monsters being strange.

{Were you like this once - all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed?}
{hardly, horace.}

He could hear the utter disdain in her voice. Jannisari was not the joking type, but Horace still tried and, more often than not, ended up at least amused with the results. He was easily entertained. His attention shifted back to the monster just as she seriously intoned her woe about the... creepteria? Teria... -teria.. cafeteria?

"Why does it close? When does it close? Are you not sufficiently fed?"

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

Helmut let out a low whine of distress as he gave a good - a very good - suggestion. On one hand, she didn't want anyone else to see it. On the other, if he was good, maybe he could help? Eventually she lifted her face off of the notepad and slowly - painfully - slid her hands so she could push the notes closer to him, all the while looking down as if she were in great shame.

The notebook was filled with class notes on semi-advanced math, half of which were wrong or unanswered, and what did sport a correct answer was always because it was clearly easier than the others, be it because the word problems were shorter, or because it had a retail-like premise. Her handwriting was careful but sloppy, as if she tried really hard to be neat, but somehow failed along the way.

But with the distraction of the cafeteria at hand, at least she looked a little less horrified with herself and her work.

"It closes for four whole hours every day." The ghoul whined, as if her life was over. "I save snacks but sometimes it's really hard..." She trailed off, saddened by the concept of not being able to get ready-made food at any time.

"I...um...eat a lot..." The small ghoul explained, drumming her tiny fingers on the dirty old desk. It was hard to tell due to the many layers of clothing that were much too big for her, but she was a scrawny little thing, the only pudge to her consisting of very stubborn baby fat.

the semblance of unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

Helmut look even tinier as she whined, her body seeming to almost disappear into her clothing. Horace grimaced. Monsters and their appetites were something else. "Can't you just... sleep the hours that it's closed? Surely you don't have to eat all the time." It was an alarming thought - he'd read of gluttony demons, of course, and was markedly glad he had not met one yet. Shaking his head, he reached out and took her workbook, scanning a few pages.

"Oh wow," he blurted. "-you're awful at this." He thumbed through a few more pages. The math book was nothing special, so there was no need to take more notes. It was, for all intents and purposes, very much like something he would've done in high school. "Look, this is just the quadratic formula."

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

"I can't sleep if I know it's closed! What if I get night munchies?" Her eyes were wide with horror at the prospect of not having access to food twenty-four hours a day. As if to punctuate this, her stomach let out a long, loud growl.

But then, he did the very thing she had been afraid of; he acknowledged her failure at math.

She sputtered something incomprehensible, but as she did, tears began to well in her dark eyes. Then, after she sucked in a shaking breath to let it out in a long and unhappy wail, she buried her face in her arms, into the layers and layers of knitted sweaters. Her ears flattened against the sides of her head, and she started saying something - but between the unhappy waiver in her voice and the way she was trying to make the world disappear in the most childish of manners, it was hard to hear anything understandable.

the semblance of unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

Horace jerked in alarm as the tiny monster began to wail loudly. s**t. He was pretty certain that 'making monsters cry' was a fast track to drawing undue attention to himself. His hand went up to rub at the bridge of his nose before he remembered that, in this form, he wore a mask and no glasses.

"Look, just... stop crying." She was wailing something uncomprehensable. He walked over to her and thwaped her neatly on the head with her workbook. {there is a tact required, even with monsters. do not burn so very many bridges.} Sighing, Horace dropped his hand on the ghoul's head and began to awkwardly move it in some sort of pat and stroke combination. He peered down at her. Was it working?

"I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, He... Helmut?" That was right, wasn't it? "Many are bad at math, I am sure and you... have promise." She was dismal, really, but he figured a litle padding of her ego might help. He patted her head again.

Enoh Love

 

[Enoh Love]

Telling her to stop crying wasn't helping. She instead wailed louder, just once, before going back to unhappy chitterings of an unhappy ghoul. She knew she shouldn't have given him her workbook! It was an all around bad idea and a very bad one, at that.

But the half apology and the subsequent lie was enough to have her sit up suddenly, ears perked and eyes wide with hope.

"R-REALLY?" She yelled, much too loudly - and likely more-so than she intended. It seemed that with that, all was forgiven. The head pats were good, too, even if they would likely leave Horace's hand feeling cold. The same sort of cold you'd get from being out in the snow for too long. She grinned at him, her mouth splitting wider than it should have to show rows and rows of razor sharp teeth.

"Can you help me be better? Please? PLEASE?!" She frantically moved in her chair, reaching out to grab his arm - or at least the fabric of his sleeve - as if that would help her plead her case.

the semblance of unity

 

[The Semblance of Unity]

"I can ******** try," he muttered. He didn't really have a choice now. Sighing, he took his hand off of her head. Was she some kind of ice beast? His thoughts were scattered quite alarmingly as she grin and he shuddered involuntarily. My, what teeth you have. And then she grabbed his arm and Horace jerked back violently, ripping the sleeve from her grasp.

For a moment, he just stood there, knees slightly bent, instinctively waiting to see her next move. {horace.} Jannisari hissed and he blinked, suddenly realizing that if he'd been able to, she would have already been summoned onto his fists. Horace coughed, straightened, and calmly walked back to the desk.

"Forgive me. I was startled," he drawled raspily. "So, which ones do you find most difficult?" Horace had roped himself into this, he knew. With gritted teeth, he stared at the workbook. Of course, Jannisari simpliy chuckled dryly in his mind.

Horace was trapped. Forever.