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guild for Sidekick Academy, a superhero b/c! Or sidekick, if you wanna see it that way... 

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[Crit]The Troll, North Quinnrose

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jackiee153

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 02, 2014 8:17 am
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The Troll✪North Quinnrose
 
PostPosted: Sun Feb 02, 2014 8:57 am
Hero alias: The Troll     
Real name: North Quinnrose (Goes by both North and Quinnrose, although most people just call it North)
Gender: It's a mystery... Although rumors lean towards North being a girl. It thinks it is best to keep its gender a secret. North is also rather ornery. And actually kind of likes being called it. May be revealed at a later time.
Powers/abilities: Vitakinesis (Biological Manipulation) 
Pretty much, North is able to change its biological make up, and thus appearance.
Rookie: North must be able to touch the substance in order to change only the part and a slight bit of the surrounding area that touches the substance into said substance.
Ex: North touches the Crystal ball of its weapon with its left hand, thus it's hand up to it's wrist becomes crystal. The longer it holds contact with the substance the further it transforms. If it can keep contact for quite a while (around a 45 seconds, a while when in a fight) about the entire length of its arm may transform.
It cannot, however, take on the form of anything but a solid inanimate object (ex:no animal transformation or transforming into water). Stones and minerals seem to work the best and reduce time by about 3 seconds.
If North keeps any part of its body in this form for over an hour, the change becomes permanent.

North can also change very slight things in its appearance, such as eye color or changing hair colors. It is a very slow and draining process though. 
After about an hour, these changes naturally begin to fade. It isn't hard for North to simply redo them, she simply has to go through the pain and use up more energy again.
Sidekick: North still must be able to touch the substance in order to transform, but now much larger parts of North may change at a much faster speed.
Ex: North touches the Crystal ball of its weapon with its left hand, now all the way up it's arm a shoulder transformed in under 5 seconds. 
It still cannot take on the form of anything but a solid inanimate object. Stones and Minerals still seem to work best, reducing time by about 3 seconds still.
In this stage, if North keeps any part of her body in this form for over an hour and a half, the change becomes permanent.

Now North can change slightly larger things about itself, such as skin color. This is still a slow and draining process. It can even be a bit painful to since it is literally changing its own genetic code in more intense ways.After about a two hours, these changes naturally begin to fade. It still isn't hard for North to simply redo them, she simply has to go through the pain and use up more energy again.

Hero:North must be able to touch the substance in order to transform, but now it work much faster, and is relatively easy to reach full body transformation.
Ex: North touches the Crystal ball of its weapon with its left hand, it's entire body is transformed in under 7 seconds. 
It still cannot take on the form of anything but a solid inanimate object. Stones and Minerals continue to work best, reducing time by about 5 seconds. In this stage, If North keeps any part of its body in changed form for over two hours, the change becomes permanent.

In this stage North can change color and slightly even shape (to look more masculine or feminine). Very handy for stealth mode, but it takes about 10 minutes to change to be completely (hair color, eye color, skin color, shape), which can actually be used as an advantage. Since the process is so slow, the human eye and mind usually takes a while to register what's happening, and it can usually go unnoticed. At this point the process is mostly just exhausting, but still a bit painful as well. After about a four hours, these changes naturally begin to fade. Yet again, it isn't hard for North to simply redo them, she simply has to go through the pain and use up more energy again.

Which area is the character based/from: Ronth 
Age upon entering academy: 15 
How did your character get their powers: North got his/her abilities from either genetic experimentation or a witch doctor (see back history for more). 
Motivation for entering academy: North knows next to nothing about itself, and would like to know more while also expanding its power range. What else is there to do any way? 

Strengths: 
Brains and brawn: Despite never really going to school, North is actually very intelligent and cunning, along with being very physically strong. North presumes something was done to its brain at some point that it can't remember, as there are some scars that can be felt on the back of its head. Although it is uncertain, it hypothesizes that it may have something to do with its intelligence, as well as strength. Although, it also thinks it may have been something before whatever the scientist did.
Stealth mode, activated!: North is good at adapting, even in the extreme. It would work wonderfully if it wanted to hide in plain sight. Its abilities definitely help with this. Being able to change its appearance, North can easily blend into its surroundings.
 Fleet of foot: North is actually rather fast, although can be a bit clumsy. Again, this leads it to think something was done to it in the lab, perhaps it did physical training before being experimented on, but it is unsure.

Weaknesses: 
Curiosity killed the cat: North can be overly curious and want to learn more, to a point where it gets North into trouble.
Out of the loop:Since North has never known a life that could even remotely be considered 'normal' it hardly knows how to completely function socially until it gets comfortable with someone. For the most part, North is awkward in the sense that, it doesn't know social boundaries, and frequently finds itself being quiet simply because it isn't sure what to say.
Me Troll me SMASH!: North can be a bit short tempered. Despite its efforts, North's patience runs out quickly. NEVER mess with anything it considers a friend.
Need... Energy...:North's abilities run largely off of energy thus making North tired almost all the time. North frequently deals with this by drinking energy drinks. Even though North knows they aren't good for it, it also knows that it needs energy in order to properly function.


Personality:
I'm late! I'm late!: North is a worry wart. Despite its rather laid-back attitude, North finds it hard to relax, always worrying and thinking of something. Although, North still tends to procrastinate rather badly- frequently due to indecisiveness.

Dream, with your eyes wide open: North is very inquisitive, always wanting to know 'why' and leads it to be very imaginative. Although North has a bad habit of day dreaming and imagining creative and unique inventions it rarely acts on any of its ideas. Although, North is actually a bit of a poet, and will randomly write down little bits of ideas for its writings, but little more than that.

 At your service!:North sees its life and its new found abilities as an opportunity to help and serve others. Although, North can be a bit socially awkward due to not having much experience. North still tries thogh, over time it will get better.

Smaller on the inside: North lacks anything remotely related to self-confidence, but does a good job of pretending other wise. North doesn't usually act overly pompous or anything of that nature, it just tries to put on a fake mask of confidence. As such, North also lacks trust and confidence in others, afraid that putting trust in someone will result in failure, more problems, and potentially even heart ache. North doesn't believe in love for that reason and tries to keep a sense of 'normalcy' for others, while staying emotionally detached.

Sharp tongue: North tends to be ornery and blunt. There really isn't a good connection between its brain and its mouth, and definitely not a 'think before you act' response. Which can be both good and bad. Good, because without thinking about it, North can actually be rather witty and cunning. Some times the thought process just gets in the was of sheer genius. It is bad because North frequently says things it shouldn't. 


Favorite food: Hearty beef stew and meat-lover's pizza
Favorite color: Icy blue
Hobbies: Reading, writing, sleeping 

General backstory: North woke up in Ronth one day. She had a few memories of a lab that were very dull, like she was a sleep the entire time, and slightly more vivid memories of a witch doctor in a hut chanting something. All North had and knew were the odd memories, and the even stranger weapon clenched tightly in hand. The weapon appeared to be made from crystal, but it also looked like ice of some sort of odd liquid that made it memorizing. Uncertain of what kind of substance it was made from, North went ahead and later called it a crystal ball (also because it also showed the bad guys their fate, or so North said.

At the time, North didn't even have a name, only when someone found her and took it in, did it receive the name of North. Originally, it was just a bit if a joke, since Ronth was furthest North and North's odd physical appearance made North's 'care taker' think of the frigid North. Quinnrose was simply North's choice since it though it was a good last name.

North stayed with its original 'care taker', a pastor of a church in Ronth, for a few months until the Church was burned down one sad evening, the pastor trapped inside. During those few months the pastor, Randy was what he told North, was very kind to North and North grew to trust him quickly. North saw Randy as a father. When North finally asked why Randy had helped it and taken care of it, Randy replied 'Because God led me to you to take care of you. He has something grand in store for you.' North found the fire and, more importantly, the loss of Randy absolutely devastating and was bothered that the police simply brushed the fire off as being an accident. Being that North was only about 14 when it lost Randy, many people from the church offered their help but, fearing the rumors it had heard about the foster care system, it skunk into the shadows. Since, North completely went under cover, even keeping gender a secret and trying to become a 'full time hero'. As North had known about the abilities the entire time, and kept the weapon close, finding and odd solstice with it. It joined the academy nearly a year after the loss of Randy, wanting to improve its skills.

Due to having no known past, North cannot really get a real job anyway. So, it just does what it can to get by and serve as a hero as much as possible. Still, North is trying to 'jury-rig' it to where it can take online college courses from the library computers. North hopes there is something grand in store in its future like Randy said. It also hopes to uncover more secrets about the fire that took its beloved care taker away, unable to push aside the thought that the fire might not have been an accident.

Looks department: 
Premade  

jackiee153

Eloquent Explorer


jackiee153

Eloquent Explorer

PostPosted: Fri Feb 28, 2014 11:30 pm
Almost finished! Ugh... I've been so busy!
Before I forget, the more I think about it, simply "It" seems like it wouldn't be a bad alias? Or maybe "Thing"? I dunno... I'm really bad at names XP
If you have any suggestions feel free to leave them!
All I have left to do is the history I think, so you guys are more than welcome to start crits on everything else if you would like! ^^
Edit: crits now open biggrin  
PostPosted: Sun Mar 02, 2014 11:07 am
May I just start off by saying I seriously love North's powers? * v *
I think the way you've broken them down is fantastic but I do have a few questions. How long does the transformation last when North transforms its body by touching its weapon?
And when North is transforming its body, are those permanent changes or temporary? Example, when it's changing its body type/figure or physical appearance such as hair/eye color. I like that when it's doing this, it's actually a painful process. It adds a little spice to the mix.

@Strengths/Weaknesses
Why didn't he go to school? How did he become intelligent/cunning? Does its stealth have to do with its powers?
I like that North's socially awkward, but in what way? Does it not know what to say or instead talk too much or doesn't know how to read social cues/etiquette, maybe lacks manners? And how does North deal with tiredness though?
In general, this section's a little bit lacking in details. I think it would be great if you could expand a little more on these. Maybe filling in the history will help more with it also.

@Personality
Just the same comments as above about North's social awkwardness. And the part about North being emotionally detached seems to be clashing a bit with the 'emotional' weakness, perhaps instead of saying that North gets emotional, say that North simply has a short temper? Which would fit into its lack of patience.

@History
This feels a bit jumbled to me. A witch doctor and a laboratory are two things that bring up entirely different images to me, so it would be great if you could give a more in-depth explanation about it.
I do like how they came up with the name North though, that's really cute. Haha. And I'm really interested in learning more about North's relationship with the pastor. How did it affect it? Was the church fire an accident or did someone set it, etc. How did it all happen?
Did North make any friends after the incident? Or… Did North have any friends to begin with from the church community? Why did the pastor take North in?
How many years has North been on its own? Does it spend a lot of time in the library learning on its own? Why didn't it go to school?

So far, a great start on North's profile. I'm really curious to know more though. u - u
Also, for looks you don't really have to put anything there.

jackiee153


I forgot to ask, what is the weapon made of? Crystal/mineral that can help protect/shield North? What are its properties?  

Shnazz
Crew


jackiee153

Eloquent Explorer

PostPosted: Tue Mar 04, 2014 7:37 am
Shnazz

I just realized I hadn't posted letting you know I had made changes xp sorry, my bad.

I'm glad you like its powers smile I was afraid they would be a little on the too strong side sweatdrop I placed some time limits on them and told what would happen should it go over the time limit.

I just realized I didn't put much of a time line, pretty much, at this point North only fully remembers two years of its life. I would imagine Randy would try to educate it a bit, but probably couldn't do much by way of formal education since North probably doesn't technically exist to the school system without social security and all that jazz. Also, the rest has been further expanded on.

I added a bit more to suggest that the witch doctor and the lab happened at two separate times and settings. I also used the history to further explain what happened with Randy and the weapon.  
PostPosted: Tue Mar 04, 2014 12:30 pm
Hey! I guess I'll just leave this shiny new crit riiiight...

Here!

It/They(them) – This is more a personal pet peeve of mine than anything else, but generally, you don’t refer to people as it – since the gender is ambiguous, the singular they/them is perfectly fine!

Power:

Overall I like the Biological Manipulation idea. Though I think there needs to be a few tweaks here and there for balance.

Rookie: I’d say increase the total time to transform a part of their body to 60 seconds per part (or one post) I like that it has to be a solid, inanimate object. Though, I would say instead of forcing that part of the body to become permenately changed after an hour, instead the body forces itself back to its normal make up (perhaps painfully because it is rejecting the obviously foregin material) which could set North up for even more pain if they’re using that arm to block or attack and it suddenly morphs back into flesh.

Sidekick: I would say here you could bump the time for them to transform down to 30 seconds per part (so hand + arm = 1 post) same rejection rule as before applies.

Hero: Here is where North is going to be really fast during a transformation I’d say knock it down to 15 seconds per part (so four parts = 1 post) and again, the same as before, going with the rejection of materal.

Though a quick question for the overall power – what happens to North if they’re in a stone/crystal form and their limb gets shattered? If they find all the pieces can they puzzle themselves back together and regenerate the limb? Or do they lose the limb completely? Can they make a new limb out of rock or metal if need be?

Strengths:

Brains and Brawn | Fleet of Foot: I’d pick one of these two strengths and ditch the other. Without a proper education – a high intellect and cunning doesn’t really amount to much short of survival of the fittest type tactical behavior. Personally I’d stick with the Brains and Brawn strength, and toss out the Fleet of Foot trait. Strength has to come with some impediment and that’s usually speed.

I would give North another strength probably relating to their ability to protect themselves from harm by changing part of their body into something heavy and solid.

Weaknesses:

These look okay though I’d love to see Curiosity and short temper expanded.
How have these two traits helped shape North’s personality?

Personality:

As a whole these look okay – but I’d love to see them expanded on. How does North interact with others? Are there certain things that set off North’s lack of confidence. Are there things that set off North’s need to lash out with their wit? What makes North feel the need to serve everyone. Expand – Expand – expand! I’d love to see more in the personality right now it feels really light!

Backstory:

The opening confuses me a little – did North actually undergo an ordeal in the lab and hallucinate the witch doctor or? A bit more clarity in this first paragraph would be loved! I’d love a bit more expansion on their growing up in Ronth and how it shaped their growth into who they are today – how they figured out that they had powers and how they survived to be headhunted by the Academy.

If you could also expand on their timeline, like where they were for early childhood -> to the lab -> to Ronth -> to present, that might help clear things up as well.

jackiee153
 

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