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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 8:31 pm
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Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 10:46 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:09 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 4:35 pm
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Oh, you should've said that from the beginning! smile
Well, I used to have an anxiety disorder, so I was really shy. I had to learn how to battle my shyness. Most of the time, shyness comes from fear: fear of what others think, fear of making mistakes, fear of looking stupid, fear of being embarrassed, those kind of things.
What I did to help me get over these fears was get rid of these fearful thoughts. I would pretend that these fears were written on a paper in my head, and then I would throw them away in a mental wastebasket. Sometimes, I even wrote them down and threw them away for real.
I also put myself in situations I wouldn't normally go into because of my shyness. I joined a couple of student organizations in high school and college. In college, I started modeling and acting, which helps me today whenever I get nervous in the classes I teach (and trust me, I get nervous every time I'm in front of my students).
Just take small steps. The Skype option is open, and it'll help you communicate without being in the presence of another person. Once you get comfortable, branch out a little. Nothing too big. Try Meetup.com for community clubs that meet only once a week. I went to a Japanese language Meetup good, and the atmosphere is relaxing without putting you on the spot. Or if you're in high school or college, join a student organization or do volunteer service (Volunteer.org).
Hope this helps!
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 5:26 pm
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thejade9 Oh, you should've said that from the beginning! smile Well, I used to have an anxiety disorder, so I was really shy. I had to learn how to battle my shyness. Most of the time, shyness comes from fear: fear of what others think, fear of making mistakes, fear of looking stupid, fear of being embarrassed, those kind of things. What I did to help me get over these fears was get rid of these fearful thoughts. I would pretend that these fears were written on a paper in my head, and then I would throw them away in a mental wastebasket. Sometimes, I even wrote them down and threw them away for real. I also put myself in situations I wouldn't normally go into because of my shyness. I joined a couple of student organizations in high school and college. In college, I started modeling and acting, which helps me today whenever I get nervous in the classes I teach (and trust me, I get nervous every time I'm in front of my students). Just take small steps. The Skype option is open, and it'll help you communicate without being in the presence of another person. Once you get comfortable, branch out a little. Nothing too big. Try Meetup.com for community clubs that meet only once a week. I went to a Japanese language Meetup good, and the atmosphere is relaxing without putting you on the spot. Or if you're in high school or college, join a student organization or do volunteer service (Volunteer.org). Hope this helps!
This was more helpful. Thanks. I'm currently studying japanese in College and until this semester there was a weekly meeting called "Japanese Table" that I would always go to. We played games that we would have to use the skills learned in class for. I did speak in japanese often during this though.
Also, I'm actually weird. I am more shy about speaking through skype than in person. I've always had this weird thing about phones. freaks me out xD. I don't even have skype calls with friends usually. I've done video chat and it was ok but just calling i am weird about...
I actually used to be a lot more shy than I am now. It's just I am definitely afraid of making mistakes and being made fun of and embarrassing myself and all of that. I know I'm pretty good at japanese though. My vocabulary is a little weak.... but when I listen to japanese conversation I can usually pull something out of it, even at normal speed.
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 6:30 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 7:01 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 7:35 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 7:54 pm
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 8:01 pm
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Haha, I'm just ranting, really. I used to have a lot of trouble with my self-confidence, self-esteem, and shyness. I still do, to be very honest. I mean, who doesn't?! (They're not human, if not.)
But look, you can't go on making excuses about yourself. Excuses aren't going to help you. In the end, you need to accept yourself, fears included. One of my friends once told me, "Don't let anyone tell you that you're not amazing." I think this kind of statement is held true for you too.
がんばれ!
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 8:25 pm
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thejade9 Haha, I'm just ranting, really. I used to have a lot of trouble with my self-confidence, self-esteem, and shyness. I still do, to be very honest. I mean, who doesn't?! (They're not human, if not.) But look, you can't go on making excuses about yourself. Excuses aren't going to help you. In the end, you need to accept yourself, fears included. One of my friends once told me, "Don't let anyone tell you that you're not amazing." I think this kind of statement is held true for you too. がんばれ!
どうもありがとう! I think you have helped point me in the right direction. Actually I have a friend who seems to have all the confidence in the world. She isn't self conscious about speaking japanese. but she isn't good at it. She just says a little here and there but she just isnt' very good at it and we are at the same level class. at times I practice to myself so at least when I know what I am saying I can say it somewhat fluently, and I pronounce things right. She doesn't really know how good I am or not but she always says something like "you never study" or put's me down in some way. I really hate it but I haven't really proven her wrong so I just accept it.
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Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2012 9:32 pm
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Miyu_Aizawa どうもありがとう! I think you have helped point me in the right direction. Actually I have a friend who seems to have all the confidence in the world. She isn't self conscious about speaking japanese. but she isn't good at it. She just says a little here and there but she just isnt' very good at it and we are at the same level class. at times I practice to myself so at least when I know what I am saying I can say it somewhat fluently, and I pronounce things right. She doesn't really know how good I am or not but she always says something like "you never study" or put's me down in some way. I really hate it but I haven't really proven her wrong so I just accept it.
Honestly, I don't care about this person you're talking about. Who cares if she has all of the confidence in the world? If she's putting you down, she's just covering up her real insecurities with a fake face. Try not to compare your own ability to others because your confidence won't be based off of your own thoughts; they'll have to find confirmation in others. How is that self-confidence? You don't need to prove anything to anyone. You said it yourself, "She doesn't really know how good I am." Obviously, you have some confidence in your abilities as a Japanese learner. Just change that statement to, "I know how good I am."
In Japan, many of my students are shy as well. Some don't have any confidence in their ability to speak English. Some students are quite good at English, but because they have no confidence in their own abilities, they get overshadowed by weaker English learners. I think that if these students can gain some confidence, they could go down a path of becoming an excellent English speaker. I suppose it's the same situation with you, but in reverse. Just remember, you're not alone in being a shy person.
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Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 1:18 pm
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thejade9 Miyu_Aizawa どうもありがとう! I think you have helped point me in the right direction. Actually I have a friend who seems to have all the confidence in the world. She isn't self conscious about speaking japanese. but she isn't good at it. She just says a little here and there but she just isnt' very good at it and we are at the same level class. at times I practice to myself so at least when I know what I am saying I can say it somewhat fluently, and I pronounce things right. She doesn't really know how good I am or not but she always says something like "you never study" or put's me down in some way. I really hate it but I haven't really proven her wrong so I just accept it. Honestly, I don't care about this person you're talking about. Who cares if she has all of the confidence in the world? If she's putting you down, she's just covering up her real insecurities with a fake face. Try not to compare your own ability to others because your confidence won't be based off of your own thoughts; they'll have to find confirmation in others. How is that self-confidence? You don't need to prove anything to anyone. You said it yourself, "She doesn't really know how good I am." Obviously, you have some confidence in your abilities as a Japanese learner. Just change that statement to, "I know how good I am." In Japan, many of my students are shy as well. Some don't have any confidence in their ability to speak English. Some students are quite good at English, but because they have no confidence in their own abilities, they get overshadowed by weaker English learners. I think that if these students can gain some confidence, they could go down a path of becoming an excellent English speaker. I suppose it's the same situation with you, but in reverse. Just remember, you're not alone in being a shy person.
Thank you! I know I just have to believe in myself. I have to make myself believe in myself... I had a friend from Japan who was studying at my university for a semester and he told me I should talk in japanese and I said "I can't because I'm too shy" and he said "I am also really shy but because I'm in America I have to speak english, right?". I can understand that. That's how I feel I think. That even if I'm afraid, if I was in Japan I would have to speak Japanese so I would >.>
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Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 2:33 pm
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Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:29 pm
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