Mother the wardrobe is full of infantrymen

[Pshycho Maniac]

mother the wardrobe is full of infantrymen
by Roger McGough



mother the wardrobe is full of infantrymen
i did i asked them
but they snarled saying it was a man's life

mother there's a centurion tank in the parlour
i did i asked the officer
but he laughed saying 'Queen's regulations'
(piano was out of tune anyway)

mother polish your identity bracelet
there is a mushroom cloud in the backgarden
i did i tried to bring in the cat
but it simply came to pieces in my hand
i did i tried to whitewash the windows
but there weren't any
i did i tried to hide under the stairs
but i couldn't get in for the civil defence leaders
i did i tried ringing candid camera
but they crossed thier hearts

i went for a policement but they were looting the town
i went out for a fire engine but they were all upside down
i went out for a priest but they were all on their knees
mother don't just lie there, say something please
mother don't just lie there, say something please  

[Regal Reprobation]

That's nice and all...but...what's the point of posting it here?  

[Hellthunder]

Good lord. that puled a heart string.  

[StormDawn]

where did you get that?  

[Pshycho Maniac]

Regi, i dunno.

Ira, it is one of the reasons I posted it.

Dave, teh internet.  

[StormDawn]

1) who is Ira
2)I know you got it from the internet. rhetorical question
3) why would you post something so... so saddening?  

[Pshycho Maniac]

StormDawn

1) who is Ira
2)I know you got it from the internet. rhetorical question
3) why would you post something so... so saddening?

1) Read the new Topic.
2) I like honey.
3) I felt sad.  

[Regal Reprobation]

Honey is quite nice, especially in mustard.  

[Pshycho Maniac]

I hat Mustard.  

[Regal Reprobation]

So does my little sister. Says it tastes like pickles...even though she loves pickles now...  

[Pshycho Maniac]

Heh.
She does love pickles, yeah.  

[StormDawn]

wow. I love mustard. and pickles are only bad if they are made of wood.  

[Pshycho Maniac]

Pickles taste sour.  

[Hellthunder]

Kind of the point Alex. And have you actually had your house occupied by a military unit? I have  

[Pshycho Maniac]

No, but you life in North Ireland.

A couple years ago it was as bad as the Israelis and the Palestines.