Keeping your virginity ?

[Miss_XxAriaxX]

I remember in High school, girls started to talk about sex already. Some people were already sleeping with anyone, others will do it in a relationship.

I was not into this at all. I thought a woman should lose her virginity to her husband. I have no religion. It is a belief I had. My mom told me it is the best way like this to know which guy only want to have sex, and who really love you.

Nowadays, not a lot of people get married. Some raise kids unmarried... A lot of people have sex before marriage.

I'm 26, and some people laughed at me because I was a virgin.
Anyways, my friend told me you just haven't felt it the need of doing it because I wasn't in a real relationship. Well, I dated people... I didn't feel the attraction so I ended the relationship.

Right now, I am in a relationship , the attraction is strong.
I told him that I was a virgin. He said it is fine, we'll take our time and it comes naturally. I told him I don't want to get pregnant. He said contraception exist. I told him yeah I know but 2 of my friend got pregnant while taking the contraceptive pills. So he told me that we can use 2 method of contraception.

Anyways, what he doesn't know is... the only time we will do it is if I am married.

I don't want to tell him this yet. It has only been 3 weeks that we are dating.
He kisses me a lot , I like it. He likes to touch my body...

I would have never thought I would let him touch my body parts... It's like foreplay...  

[cool4]

I always believed t if you're doing everything else but sticking part A into Slot B, the concept of virginity seemed so pointless. Granted at the Same time I don't believe having a ton of sexual partners leads to very healthy relationships overtime.

In the modern world what marriage means is very broken. Where I live the Law just changed recently that gives Common Law partners (People who have been living together in a relationship for two years) the same rights as those of a married couple. If Marriage is not a Religious Thing for you, it is nothing more then a signed paper, that you can get simply by living with someone. Though the Common Law rules don't apply to everywhere, it's more or less a matter of time before they do.

Fun fact, In Christian Universities before they graduate, more couples are planning weddings, then in non Religious Schools. It's often theorised, that they want to experience sex, but they insist on resolving the moral issues surrounding it.

You've been dating 3 weeks, and you're a virgin. If you keep letting him touch you, eventually your senses toward wait for marriage will die down. Because touch triggers the sexual desire in the body.

Because you're a virgin, wait a while to have sex. If he's just trying to sleep with you and you tell him no, or you're not ready eventually he'll just move on. Otherwise he genuinely likes you, and if you wait for marriage, or you sleep with him in a year or two it's not a big deal. Talk about what it means to you, and if Marriage really is your desire, talk to him about it, because you both can back off the sexual chemistry and wait.

Having few sexual partners, or being a virgin in this world is honourable.  

[Miss_XxAriaxX]

Squishy Froggo

That's actually really surprising how sexually active a lot of people are. Maybe it has something to do with the culture of different countries? Really surprised that you let a new boyfriend of 3 weeks only touch you.

Even my own boyfriend was shy and felt ashamed that he wanted to touch me but I said it was fine and I enjoyed it as well. I'm still a virgin though and I don't really like the concept of risking pregnancy simply because of the enjoyment of having sex. The concept is so vulgar, but whatever floats people's boats I guess. I mean if there are people that enjoy flings and flirting with a lot of people, there's gotta be people that like sleeping with a lot of other people...and well, I don't really let the choices of others influence my own. I choose to not have actual sex yet but I like and enjoy doing other sexual activities (foreplay and pretty much anything that doesnt involve penetration)

I really think that if you're insistent on keeping your virginity until marriage, you have to tell your boyfriend as soon as possible. It's better than telling him late and ruining his expectations. Depending on the kind of guy he is, that might be a dealbreaker for him. It's very important to be specific about what you want in a relationship or you'll end up unhappy.

Thank you Squishy Froggo for your advice. How old are you? My boyfriend is 26 just like me. He is not a virgin. I think that's why he is not shy to touch me at all. I know it's early to let him touch me, but it somehow turned that way. -_- I like it too although I know it's kinda early. That's why I told him that I'm a virgin, and he said to take my time, he doesn't mind not doing it (I don't know if this will change in the future like how long can he wait), but he really wants to touch me. Because, one day I told him, you know no one touched me before like that, and he said I'm really happy to touch you I'm lucky...

When he is with me he like to show affection, spend time to relax, get to know what I like to do, my tastes in life , and when no one is there he likes to touch me.  

[Miss_XxAriaxX]

cool4

I always believed t if you're doing everything else but sticking part A into Slot B, the concept of virginity seemed so pointless. Granted at the Same time I don't believe having a ton of sexual partners leads to very healthy relationships overtime.

In the modern world what marriage means is very broken. Where I live the Law just changed recently that gives Common Law partners (People who have been living together in a relationship for two years) the same rights as those of a married couple. If Marriage is not a Religious Thing for you, it is nothing more then a signed paper, that you can get simply by living with someone. Though the Common Law rules don't apply to everywhere, it's more or less a matter of time before they do.

Fun fact, In Christian Universities before they graduate, more couples are planning weddings, then in non Religious Schools. It's often theorised, that they want to experience sex, but they insist on resolving the moral issues surrounding it.

You've been dating 3 weeks, and you're a virgin. If you keep letting him touch you, eventually your senses toward wait for marriage will die down. Because touch triggers the sexual desire in the body.

Because you're a virgin, wait a while to have sex. If he's just trying to sleep with you and you tell him no, or you're not ready eventually he'll just move on. Otherwise he genuinely likes you, and if you wait for marriage, or you sleep with him in a year or two it's not a big deal. Talk about what it means to you, and if Marriage really is your desire, talk to him about it, because you both can back off the sexual chemistry and wait.

Having few sexual partners, or being a virgin in this world is honourable.

It's so true about the concept about marriage... Some people are afraid of marriage because of divorce (when money is involved)... Yeah foreplay triggers the desire of having sex I've felt it, I resisted quite well...

Thank you cool4 for your advice smile  

[cool4]

XxAriaxX

cool4

I always believed t if you're doing everything else but sticking part A into Slot B, the concept of virginity seemed so pointless. Granted at the Same time I don't believe having a ton of sexual partners leads to very healthy relationships overtime.

In the modern world what marriage means is very broken. Where I live the Law just changed recently that gives Common Law partners (People who have been living together in a relationship for two years) the same rights as those of a married couple. If Marriage is not a Religious Thing for you, it is nothing more then a signed paper, that you can get simply by living with someone. Though the Common Law rules don't apply to everywhere, it's more or less a matter of time before they do.

Fun fact, In Christian Universities before they graduate, more couples are planning weddings, then in non Religious Schools. It's often theorised, that they want to experience sex, but they insist on resolving the moral issues surrounding it.

You've been dating 3 weeks, and you're a virgin. If you keep letting him touch you, eventually your senses toward wait for marriage will die down. Because touch triggers the sexual desire in the body.

Because you're a virgin, wait a while to have sex. If he's just trying to sleep with you and you tell him no, or you're not ready eventually he'll just move on. Otherwise he genuinely likes you, and if you wait for marriage, or you sleep with him in a year or two it's not a big deal. Talk about what it means to you, and if Marriage really is your desire, talk to him about it, because you both can back off the sexual chemistry and wait.

Having few sexual partners, or being a virgin in this world is honourable.

It's so true about the concept about marriage... Some people are afraid of marriage because of divorce (when money is involved)... Yeah foreplay triggers the desire of having sex I've felt it, I resisted quite well...

Thank you cool4 for your advice smile

It sounds like you have a handle on it, Remember if you're ever uncomfortable ask him to stop, and if you ever have a concern about what he's doing always talk it out. And if down the line you decide to have sex, talk about things like Birth Control You intend to use, and Seeing a doctor to clear both of you of STD's..ectera.  

[Bellop]

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?  

[Miss_XxAriaxX]

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.  

[cool4]

XxAriaxX

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.

I always found the best time to talk is when you are alone and cuddling. It's often a time I can reflect on how things are going, what needs to change, and what I want to keep going.  

[Bellop]

cool4

XxAriaxX

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.

I always found the best time to talk is when you are alone and cuddling. It's often a time I can reflect on how things are going, what needs to change, and what I want to keep going.

Oh certainly! There is always a time and a place for talking, and out in public is not a good place for a serious talk in general.

The advice above is actually really good. Almost all of my serious talks have started during cuddling. Sometimes keeping the cuddling up isn't appropriate given the context, but sometimes it is. Either way quietly cuddling gives you the chance to think and bring up what you've been thinking about.  

[Miss_XxAriaxX]

cool4

XxAriaxX

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.

I always found the best time to talk is when you are alone and cuddling. It's often a time I can reflect on how things are going, what needs to change, and what I want to keep going.

thanks ! We were kissing on a bench in a park. He told me that he wanted to go to a more intimate place and i told him we are in a park there is no intimate place ... there's kids and i dont want to offend anyone. He laughed and joked about making headlines in the newspaper for innapropriate touch in public . XD. You know with the enconomy these days, eventhough we are 26 we are still cohabiting with our parents. I just feel it is better to be abstinent. Im not someone that will rent a hotel room for that... or do it somewhere not romantic at all... omg one day soon i will have a talk with him about this... next week he is traveling with his family so we wont see each other sad  

[cool4]

XxAriaxX

cool4

XxAriaxX

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.

I always found the best time to talk is when you are alone and cuddling. It's often a time I can reflect on how things are going, what needs to change, and what I want to keep going.

thanks ! We were kissing on a bench in a park. He told me that he wanted to go to a more intimate place and i told him we are in a park there is no intimate place ... there's kids and i dont want to offend anyone. He laughed and joked about making headlines in the newspaper for innapropriate touch in public . XD. You know with the enconomy these days, eventhough we are 26 we are still cohabiting with our parents. I just feel it is better to be abstinent. Im not someone that will rent a hotel room for that... or do it somewhere not romantic at all... omg one day soon i will have a talk with him about this... next week he is traveling with his family so we wont see each other sad

when i was still with my parents i had lots of time alone to cuddle, my boyfriend at the time, granted my family is pretty liberal and doesn't judge.  

[Miss_XxAriaxX]

cool4

XxAriaxX

cool4

XxAriaxX

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.

I always found the best time to talk is when you are alone and cuddling. It's often a time I can reflect on how things are going, what needs to change, and what I want to keep going.

thanks ! We were kissing on a bench in a park. He told me that he wanted to go to a more intimate place and i told him we are in a park there is no intimate place ... there's kids and i dont want to offend anyone. He laughed and joked about making headlines in the newspaper for innapropriate touch in public . XD. You know with the enconomy these days, eventhough we are 26 we are still cohabiting with our parents. I just feel it is better to be abstinent. Im not someone that will rent a hotel room for that... or do it somewhere not romantic at all... omg one day soon i will have a talk with him about this... next week he is traveling with his family so we wont see each other sad

when i was still with my parents i had lots of time alone to cuddle, my boyfriend at the time, granted my family is pretty liberal and doesn't judge.

aah... after how many months your boyfriend met your parents ?

Because if my boyfriend come over , he has to meet my mom... otherwise he cannot come...  

[cool4]

XxAriaxX

cool4

XxAriaxX

cool4

XxAriaxX

Usagi-chan93

I think that the decision to lose one's virginity before getting married is a very personal one, and if that is what you have chosen then that is great for you! Being a virgin is no reason for someone to laugh at you and it doesn't make any of your relationships less valid.

My concern comes from the fact that he is touching you. If you are okay with that, then I see no problem, but if it makes you uncomfortable I believe you should say something sooner rather than later. If you plan on staying with this guy he needs to know your boundaries. Boundaries aren't necessarily stable and can change, I think most people can vouch for this. He seems comfortable with you taking time which is a good sign. When do you plan on telling him that you don't wish to lose your virginity until marriage?

i am more someone that will talk about it if a conversation gets there than just randomly bringing up the conversation and say that... like our last date we went to watch a show , we were often in a place crowded with people i didnt feel it was the spot to talk about sex. I'll give you an update if anythings happens.

I always found the best time to talk is when you are alone and cuddling. It's often a time I can reflect on how things are going, what needs to change, and what I want to keep going.

thanks ! We were kissing on a bench in a park. He told me that he wanted to go to a more intimate place and i told him we are in a park there is no intimate place ... there's kids and i dont want to offend anyone. He laughed and joked about making headlines in the newspaper for innapropriate touch in public . XD. You know with the enconomy these days, eventhough we are 26 we are still cohabiting with our parents. I just feel it is better to be abstinent. Im not someone that will rent a hotel room for that... or do it somewhere not romantic at all... omg one day soon i will have a talk with him about this... next week he is traveling with his family so we wont see each other sad

when i was still with my parents i had lots of time alone to cuddle, my boyfriend at the time, granted my family is pretty liberal and doesn't judge.

aah... after how many months your boyfriend met your parents ?

Because if my boyfriend come over , he has to meet my mom... otherwise he cannot come...

With my first boyfriend it was before our first date, He lived a ferry ride away, so if we were gonna spend anytime together he had to come over the ferry, and met them.

With my second boyfriend I met his parents, maybe a month in they took me rock climbing, he met mine, maybe 3 months in, but I met him at University and live on the island, and my parents, live on the mainland, so it was when we had time off to go over and visit. We've been together nearing 4 years and our parents haven't met each other (not really sure when they should?). My current boyfriend just met my brother in the last year, we just couldn't be in the same place at the same time. Though with his family Sunday dinners are now a tradition.

Some see meeting the parents as a serious step, others just let it happen when it works.  

[AstridMiriam]

Miss_XxAriaxX

I remember in High school, girls started to talk about sex already. Some people were already sleeping with anyone, others will do it in a relationship.

I was not into this at all. I thought a woman should lose her virginity to her husband. I have no religion. It is a belief I had. My mom told me it is the best way like this to know which guy only want to have sex, and who really love you.

Nowadays, not a lot of people get married. Some raise kids unmarried... A lot of people have sex before marriage.

I'm 26, and some people laughed at me because I was a virgin.
Anyways, my friend told me you just haven't felt it the need of doing it because I wasn't in a real relationship. Well, I dated people... I didn't feel the attraction so I ended the relationship.

Right now, I am in a relationship , the attraction is strong.
I told him that I was a virgin. He said it is fine, we'll take our time and it comes naturally. I told him I don't want to get pregnant. He said contraception exist. I told him yeah I know but 2 of my friend got pregnant while taking the contraceptive pills. So he told me that we can use 2 method of contraception.

Anyways, what he doesn't know is... the only time we will do it is if I am married.

I don't want to tell him this yet. It has only been 3 weeks that we are dating.
He kisses me a lot , I like it. He likes to touch my body...

I would have never thought I would let him touch my body parts... It's like foreplay...

I gave up my virginity to my friend when I was 21 and I was kinda in a relationship with him but he had awful relationships in the past and yet he is now single.
Truth is if you wanna lose your virginity then look for the right one at the right time.
You could even wait till marriage if its easier for you.