So Many Nights ~~ </3CLOSED

[Ms_Sassie_Sarah]

Premys

Thecrazymusicgirl

Please try to use correct grammar

I find this rule very odd to hear from someone who in the same comment writes

Quote:

so i'll make it short n simple.

Gives me the feeling that your idea of correct grammar doesn't look even remotely the same as mine... Regardless, seems like an interesting enough prompt, I might contribute something.

She'd probably use better grammar if she was actually writing a story. You don't have to use proper grammar ALL the time.

[Premys]

Ms_Sassie_Sarah

Premys

Thecrazymusicgirl

Please try to use correct grammar

I find this rule very odd to hear from someone who in the same comment writes

Quote:

so i'll make it short n simple.

Gives me the feeling that your idea of correct grammar doesn't look even remotely the same as mine... Regardless, seems like an interesting enough prompt, I might contribute something.

She'd probably use better grammar if she was actually writing a story. You don't have to use proper grammar ALL the time.

Of course not. However, it gives a bad impression when you want to come across as professional. Introducing a contest and telling people you don't want to see grammatical errors in the entries are pretty good examples of when you'd want to show your own grammar at it's best. Like I already alluded, it gives the feeling that this person doesn't really know what proper grammar is herself.

[elenacakebunni]

Lost, Lonely, Desperate.
He was lost, lost in his mind. His mind won't appeal to him, or think correctly. There are times like this where he needs to think, think about how to survive on his own. But his mind was racing, and his heart tells him that he can't concentrate anymore. Not without her.
He was lonely, without anyone. Feeling lastly desperate, he looked at his cell phone cantacts one last time. Even if he calls her, she won't pick up. She's gone, away from the world.
He could feel himself being out of control.
There was no doubt about it, he was alone.
Losing someone in death could cause you loneliness forever. You can't even trust yourself with your racing mind, your lying heart, and your desperate soul
Without thinking it through, he wanted to join her. Away from this world, and into death.
He reached into his pocket slowly, and pulled out his knife. There was no use to think, they'll kill him anyway if he doesn't kill himself now. They killed her, they'll kill him.
They, the people who hated him so much, and wanted to him suffer, killed his love.
He raised the knife and pushed it down towards his heart, stabbing his heart completely.

[dandelioncupcake]

I'll enter! 3nodding Oh, and happy early birthday, btw. I'll post my story in a second.

[dandelioncupcake]

I watched my family die swiftly as they were torn limb from limb. The Head's officers came marching up the street, ignoring the neighbors that poked their nervous heads out of open doors, while their footfalls and grunts could be heard from my bedroom in the back of the house. I went to the kitchen and watched out of the window, thinking that they were headed for another family as we prayed that the worst tragedy wasn't about to befall us.

Fragile, young Lissa was first to go; she was playing with little wooden blocks in the front yard. She only knew how to love and knew only the feeling of being loved. She smiled up at the officers with her fat rosy cheeks, expecting a treat or maybe being picked up and whirled around in their arms. She screamed once, only one shrill call, when they tore her arms away from her torso, and soon there was nothing left of Lissa except for her golden ringlets.
I didn't wait to watch my parents' fate, and I shot out of our back screen door like a bullet. I ran into the wilderness, hot tears blurring my vision, thorns and roots clinging to my legs as I stumbled through the undergrowth.

I couldn't escape the sounds of their agony; my mother's shrieks and pleas for mercy and my father's vain attempts to defend himself punctuated the noises of the forest. Just then it hit me: I was alone. Completely alone. Everyone I loved was dead.

I had never encountered the feeling of loneliness before, and I realized then that it was a cruel, subtle mistress with many different layers, each worse than the one before.

It snowed that first night in the woods; it was that quiet snow that falls softly and covers all misdeeds. The muddy footprints and wooden toys in the front yard were most likely covered by now, and I hoped that the nice florist from next store had taken their remains to the cemetary. I remember when the Gregors down the road met this same fate--I had to be but six summers then--and my grandmother was still alive at the time. Grandmother had gone to school with Mrs. Gregor and watched with silent tears as the officers burst into their house. Grandmother came back with the florist, and I tagged along to help them bury the few remains that they found. An arm here, some toes there, a piece of bloody flesh on the floor--these were all unrecognizable to me, and didn't seem to resemble Mister and Missus Gregor or their five children. But grandmother knew a friend when she saw one, and we buried them accordingly.

As the chill nipped at my exposed arms, I realized that I wasn't suited to the snow. It had to be about ten degrees out, and I was wearing only jeans and a t-shirt, which were left over from the warm house. My stomach growled and my throat ached in thirst. I didn't recognize my surroundings, but I slowly drifted off to sleep.

I didn't know if I would ever wake up, but I knew this: Death was my only companion now, and when he came to take me away, I would welcome him with open arms.

Thanks for reading, and I hope my story didn't bum you out too much. XD Have a nice birthday!

[The Passing of Time]

Hi! biggrin I'd like to join, please, though I have a few questions first.

First off, how do you stand on strong language in the story? I've written my entry and it contains quite a bit of swearing. I read your rules, but it doesn't mention anything like that so I thought I'd ask.

Secondly, would posting a link be alright? Obviously all of the swearwords would be censored by Gaia etc. so I'd much rather post it on FictionPress.net or something.

Also, happy birthday for then! biggrin

[Thecrazymusicgirl]

The Passing of Time

Hi! biggrin I'd like to join, please, though I have a few questions first.

First off, how do you stand on strong language in the story? I've written my entry and it contains quite a bit of swearing. I read your rules, but it doesn't mention anything like that so I thought I'd ask.

Secondly, would posting a link be alright? Obviously all of the swearwords would be censored by Gaia etc. so I'd much rather post it on FictionPress.net or something.

Also, happy birthday for then! biggrin

anything is fine really, i dont mind. yes u can post it as a link smile

[The Passing of Time]

Yay, thank you! smile Here's the link to my entry. biggrin

Sorry for the dodgy formatting, I don't post an awful lot to that account and I don't really know how to do all of that fancy stuff. Will it affect my chances at winning? Would you like me to play around with it until it's fixed?

[Thecrazymusicgirl]

The Passing of Time

Yay, thank you! smile Here's the link to my entry. biggrin

Sorry for the dodgy formatting, I don't post an awful lot to that account and I don't really know how to do all of that fancy stuff. Will it affect my chances at winning? Would you like me to play around with it until it's fixed?

im sure its fine, dont worry about it. smile

[The Passing of Time]

Thecrazymusicgirl

im sure its fine, dont worry about it. smile

Thanks. biggrin

[Thecrazymusicgirl]

a little more than 10 more days....

[Vicky Nicky B]

The kiss of death

8 years ago…
The last of his family had died. His aunt, Katherine, had shot herself. He found her. She was laying on her bed with a gun in her mouth. There was a gigantic blood pool. He had a nightmare and went into her room to ask her if he could sleep in her bed. He was half asleep when he stepped into the room so when his feet landed in the pool of blood he thought it was a leak in their ceiling that had dripped on to the floor. He shook her to try to wake her up. But she wouldn’t wake up no matter how hard he shook her. Now Johnny was at the funeral. His aunts lawyer sat next to him. He was only 7 but he knew why she killed herself. Although the lawyer told him it was because she was having financial problems and because her husband had left her. This all was true but Johnny knew. He knew everyone was lying to him. He knew the reason. The reason was him. He was why everyone in his family died.

Present day…
Johnny is 15 now. He has been living in an orphanage for 8 years now. Ever since his aunt killed herself. He sat on the rock hard bed thinking. Silently. Johnny never said anything. Ever. He just sat there on his bed all day, thinking. He never said please or thank you, or hello, or goodbye. Nothing. Even when people came wanting to adopt kids. It was hard enough to get adopted being a teenager and everything but being a silent teenager, no one wanted him. Just like before he came to the orphanage. Suddenly the silence was interrupted. The orphanage owner walked down the hallway with 2 people, a man and a woman. People looking for a kid. “This is Johnny.” The owner, Mrs.Pettygrew said. “He is very shy and doesn’t talk much but otherwise he is a great kid. Never once gave me any trouble.” She lied. Johnny always gave her trouble. Not directly though. Not on purpose either. He was always getting her in trouble with the department of health safety. He refused to eat and insisted that he was put in the darkest, dankest, dampest room in the orphanage. The orphanage was almost closed on several occasions because of this “health risk” to the orphans. He was the only one who lived in the basement room. He had heard people call him mental, and suicidal, and retarded before. He didn’t care. He had been beaten as a child until his father died. Then his mom got into financial problems and had abusive boyfriends until she hung herself when Johnny was only 6 when that happened. Then he moved in with his only living relative, his aunt. But we already know what happened to her. He might as well be suicidal or mental and things like that but he wasn’t. That’s what he was mad about. He wasn’t like that despite all he went through. He often thought about what it would have been like if he was like that. Then it would be normal for him to feel sad but he wasn’t. In fact he was rather glad his parents died. Well he was happy his dad died. Not his mom though. He missed her a lot. He missed his aunt too. He was sad because he knew the true reason why they died. It was because of him. They loved him so much. Well his aunt and mom that is. But he had powers. The power of love. But when love is too strong and it is truer than true, that’s when it gets dangerous. His power of love was so strong that it killed the people he loved most. And hate is not as strong as love but it is still very strong. And he hated his father so bad that his power of love converted its power to pure hate. It killed his father and made his love even stronger. “Well he seems a little depressed.” The people said. “Him oh no of course not. His appearance may deceive you.” Mrs. Pettygrew laughed as if it was funny what happened to Johnny. He had shaggy black hair and hazel eyes. He always wore black clothes and he didn’t own any shoes except for an old pair of converse he found when he first moved into the orphanage. Then didn’t fit him back then but they fit now. “I think we’ll keep looking.” The people said.
3 years later…
“Johnny it’s your birthday today that means you are 18 and you have to leave for good.” Mrs. Pettygrew said. Johnny stepped out of the room and walked upstairs. He walked out the door with his head held high.
1 year later…
“I love you Johnny.” His girlfriend Vicky said. “I love you too.” Johnny said back kneeling on the ground.
“That is the first time I ever heard your voice.” Vicky whispered with shock. “Well your about to hear it again.” He said pulling a ring box out of his pocket. “Will you marry me???” He asked with a huge smile on his face. “YES!!!” Vicky squealed.
Their wedding day…
Vicky looked stunning. She stood in front of everyone and kissed him on the lips. The kiss of death. Suddenly Vicky died on the altar. Right in front of Johnny. He toke a knife from a waiter walking by him. He stabbed himself in the chest until it hit his heart. He put his hand in his chest and grasped his heart. Then before he could rip it out he died.

[TakeAChanceOnMe123]

I'll Enter smile

[Lusci]

Entering! I'll rustle up a piece :3