Icily Platinum
(?)Community Member
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- Posted: Sun, 01 Apr 2012 02:37:25 +0000
EDITED CRITIQUE
PART 1:
American Pie! Oh my, it took me so long to draw the connection until like halfway through the song did I realize: "I've heard this before..."
And then another quarter of the way thru did I think DON MCLEAN. Sorry, I'm not trying to take up space in this critique, xD, I know I just essentially took up two sentences...loll
Just kidding. I don't have any experience in critiquing but I have to say I love this song quite well.
While apart of me did think it was very clever to copy the rhythm from American Pie, I thought it was kind of disappointing?
I know, I know, it's hard to compose songs in and of itself, and I have surely never done so myself (except for partial rhythms that never really amounted to anything...) but I feel like you should either go all the way (as in write a song completely by yourself) or nothing at all? I'm sorry, I'm not trying to criticize you. It's just that whenever I listen to pop songs and I recognize a beat from past songs (such as Demi Levato "This Is Me" and Avril Lavigne's "Happy Ending" wink than I get a little heartbroken and disappointed.
That's just my standard for all songs so please don't take any offense by it. ^^
Of course I am impressed by your ability to change the lyrics the way you did and still find words that rhymed while keeping the beat. Kudos~!!
Okay. Thank you for your critique! ^_^
You might have missed the introductory post, but this was a parody song (think Weird Al), so copying the rhythm was intentional. More than that, I'd be interested to know what you thought of the content. Do you think it made sense? And what did you think of the tone?
I really appreciate your input!
PART 2
Aha, I did not see the intro post no.
Hmm, I've never heard of Weird Al to be honest.
*I ish very pathetic I know* I need to get out more, I live under a rock, yataya...I've heard it all before! wink
But this still demonstrates my point well I think, haha.
What if someone who had never seen this parody style of songs/poetry/fiction before? And just stumbled upon your well written -though uncannily familiar- prose and didn't see a disclaimer (like I hadn't because it wasn't in the "official" entry post) and assumed you were plagiarizing something? Eep. Not good.
I, of course, know that wasn't your intention.
My advice is to always include official disclaimers whenever doing pieces like this
(And yikes, I just spent like four paragraphs on that one little thing...) I suppose it really isn't that big of a deal, and of course you can just explain yourself after but still...
Haha. I'm just really persnickety. Sorry.
Now, as for the content...
I really liked it!
I think the beat flowed very well, as I've complimented you before. Not only that. I think you had a nice overall the concept very nice too "Mr Astronaut Guy" “Washington.” Classic Americana, right? I’m sure there’s a deeper subtext I’m missing (I was never good at literary analysis lol) but I was still able enjoy the piece overall.
Icily Platinum
DruidTigeress
The Final Frontier
PART 1:
American Pie! Oh my, it took me so long to draw the connection until like halfway through the song did I realize: "I've heard this before..."
And then another quarter of the way thru did I think DON MCLEAN. Sorry, I'm not trying to take up space in this critique, xD, I know I just essentially took up two sentences...loll
Just kidding. I don't have any experience in critiquing but I have to say I love this song quite well.
While apart of me did think it was very clever to copy the rhythm from American Pie, I thought it was kind of disappointing?
I know, I know, it's hard to compose songs in and of itself, and I have surely never done so myself (except for partial rhythms that never really amounted to anything...) but I feel like you should either go all the way (as in write a song completely by yourself) or nothing at all? I'm sorry, I'm not trying to criticize you. It's just that whenever I listen to pop songs and I recognize a beat from past songs (such as Demi Levato "This Is Me" and Avril Lavigne's "Happy Ending" wink than I get a little heartbroken and disappointed.
That's just my standard for all songs so please don't take any offense by it. ^^
Of course I am impressed by your ability to change the lyrics the way you did and still find words that rhymed while keeping the beat. Kudos~!!
DruidTigeress
Okay. Thank you for your critique! ^_^
You might have missed the introductory post, but this was a parody song (think Weird Al), so copying the rhythm was intentional. More than that, I'd be interested to know what you thought of the content. Do you think it made sense? And what did you think of the tone?
I really appreciate your input!
PART 2
Aha, I did not see the intro post no.
Hmm, I've never heard of Weird Al to be honest.
*I ish very pathetic I know* I need to get out more, I live under a rock, yataya...I've heard it all before! wink
But this still demonstrates my point well I think, haha.
What if someone who had never seen this parody style of songs/poetry/fiction before? And just stumbled upon your well written -though uncannily familiar- prose and didn't see a disclaimer (like I hadn't because it wasn't in the "official" entry post) and assumed you were plagiarizing something? Eep. Not good.
I, of course, know that wasn't your intention.
My advice is to always include official disclaimers whenever doing pieces like this
(And yikes, I just spent like four paragraphs on that one little thing...) I suppose it really isn't that big of a deal, and of course you can just explain yourself after but still...
Haha. I'm just really persnickety. Sorry.
Now, as for the content...
I really liked it!
I think the beat flowed very well, as I've complimented you before. Not only that. I think you had a nice overall the concept very nice too "Mr Astronaut Guy" “Washington.” Classic Americana, right? I’m sure there’s a deeper subtext I’m missing (I was never good at literary analysis lol) but I was still able enjoy the piece overall.