I read a few of your poems, rated, and left comments. If you would like me to clarify anything further or bounce more stuff off of me let me know. I really do enjoy critiquing and trying to make things better. You've got a lot of potential. Let me know. Granted it is nearly 1 am so my grammar is probably horrible.
Anyway http://www.gaiaonline.com/arena/writing/poetry-and-lyrics/vote/?entry_id=102331801#title is my crap but don't feel obligated to read and rate. Even if you don't but you still like my critiques send me a message!
Typical Questions: 4.5/5
What makes this poem so special, is the artful use of the refrain.
But though i loved the refrain in your other poem, I don't love it here...
For me, the poem ended with "Ah, Success."
I like that line because It's short, sweet, and simple.
I LIKE IT!
I don't know why, I just DO!
Perhaps, it's the mostly consistent syllable count.
Or maybe the intense parallelism, or the repeating "Oh."
Or maybe, the rhyme scheme.
This is a great poem