The Anti-Guide

How do you try to improve your writing?

I try to avoid old, stupid things.	17.5%	[ 2292 ]
I add new things.	14.9%	[ 1951 ]
A combination of both (if one more than the other, pick it).	67.6%	[ 8852 ]
Total Votes:			[ 13095 ]

[Firlodge_the_second]

((Hmm....fixing a blank 1142.))

[Misuki Marishima]

When your character is in school, it is high school. College is never a source of interesting events whatsoever.

{Seriously, high school... way overdone. "Best four years of your life?" Pssh. More like the easiest. College is harder, but more rewarding! 8D}

[Lady Sedia Auvryarn]

When it comes to naming any witchy characters, make sure they are always called Bethany. And if its a guy (warlock duh!) then he has to be called Hunter!

[Half Baked SF]

Misuki Marishima

More like the easiest.

((Unless you happen to be taking IB classes.

I'm guessing, though. More like hoping. whee ))

[Ophiucha]

IB Hopeless

Misuki Marishima

More like the easiest.

((Unless you happen to be taking IB classes.

I'm guessing, though. More like hoping. whee ))

((varies, I've taken five or six 'high level' classes - some of them were an actual challenge, others were just as easy as those unnecessary electives they make me take that let you know that <b> makes things bold =O ))

On this topic: if you have an exceptionally intelligent high school student as your MC (or if you are a teacher at school), make sure that the school has never even heard of an Honors/AP/IB/whatever program. The best way to keep school out of your story when you have a school age character is to put them in classes that are phenomenally simple for them with the 'idiot' kids, allowing your MC to have plenty of time to do as they please.

[SoulSalvage]

♠Wow...I just realized the best piece of advice was...

Follow this guide for writing! (If this has been said already, my God-Mode MC makes it so this hasn't been said before)♠

[Misuki Marishima]

^ That works, it's a practice of one of our number one values... Deus ex Machinas!!! =D

Also, every antagonist must be villanous. They can never just be normal guys who do all the wrong things for all the right reasons, or vice versa.

[ZimGangster]

Lady Sedia Auvryarn

When it comes to naming any witchy characters, make sure they are always called Bethany. And if its a guy (warlock duh!) then he has to be called Hunter!

((I've never seen witch characters named Bethany or Hunter... o.o))

[Zacki Zari]

ZimGangster

Lady Sedia Auvryarn

When it comes to naming any witchy characters, make sure they are always called Bethany. And if its a guy (warlock duh!) then he has to be called Hunter!

((I've never seen witch characters named Bethany or Hunter... o.o))

((I haven't seen a Bethany, but I've seen SO MANY HUNTER CHARACTERS.))
Or, if you want to be creative, name them after an animal. Like "Raven" or "Panther".

[SoulSalvage]

To be extremely original, have your characters be named after inaminate objects, like 'Apple' or 'Tire.'

((I may be wrong on this one...Hmm...))

[scrubskitten]

- When writing a villianous character, it is best for the audience to know that they are not really evil, just misunderstood. So they tried to murder your MC five or six dozen times? Big deal. Everyone knows that have sunshine and rainbows running through their veins!

((*laughs at her own joke, remembering reading the Harry Potter anti-guide when the same was said for Voldemort* XD))

- Or if they really are misunderstood, kill them, kill them, KILL THEM! So what if they just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time? KILL THEM so the reader will be happy. The audience loves pointless violence!

- When creating a female MC, she must be in high school, and must have two best friends who are both girls and either both incredibly enthusiastic, or one is all "happy, happy, joy, joy", while the other is all dark and demented.

- And when creating a male MC, he must also be in high school and be the famous quarter back with the cheerleader girlfriend...and everyone must love them. EVERYONE. If ANYONE hates them, then you have failed.

- When writing a fantasy, the MC can either be male or female, but they must either be half-elf, or fairy, or some other mythical creature and be the only one. What's the fun in the MC being a normal person while a secondary character gets all the fun?

- Oh, and they must be fantastically skilled in the means of archery or swordfighting; or have magical powers that only they possess. NO ONE else.

((Hmm, that's all I can think of. Not the most original list, but then again, in an anti-guide, that's kinda the point. xD))

((Edit: I did think of another one. I have to write it, or I'll forget it again.))

- Remember kids, the best kind of romance story goes a little somethin' like this:
1.) A likes B, but thinks they can't have B.
2.) Angst, angst, angst
3.) A tells C, who, in turn, breaks their promise to A, and tells B.
4.) B randomly tells A that they feel the same way.
5.) Sex, sex, SEX! (That's the one thing the audience likes reading the most, anyway. Might as well skip steps 1-4)
Oh, and this all happens within one page, except for the depressing angst part which gets about ten million pages to itself. 'Cause the reader loves teenage angst. (Or any type, really, but adults aren't sad; just teens.)

[Sir Lampy of Locksley]

Misuki Marishima

When your character is in school, it is high school. College is never a source of interesting events whatsoever.

{Seriously, high school... way overdone. "Best four years of your life?" Pssh. More like the easiest. College is harder, but more rewarding! 8D}

[Easiest?! girl, what kind of college did you go to? I can't wait for college though.]

Yeah, but in college, everyone gets wasted, and hilarity ensues!

[Mello_McQueen]

scrubskitten

- When writing a villianous character, it is best for the audience to know that they are not really evil, just misunderstood. So they tried to murder your MC five or six dozen times? Big deal. Everyone knows that have sunshine and rainbows running through their veins!

((*laughs at her own joke, remembering reading the Harry Potter anti-guide when the same was said for Voldemort* XD))

- Or if they really are misunderstood, kill them, kill them, KILL THEM! So what if they just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time? KILL THEM so the reader will be happy. The audience loves pointless violence!

- When creating a female MC, she must be in high school, and must have two best friends who are both girls and either both incredibly enthusiastic, or one is all "happy, happy, joy, joy", while the other is all dark and demented.

- And when creating a male MC, he must also be in high school and be the famous quarter back with the cheerleader girlfriend...and everyone must love them. EVERYONE. If ANYONE hates them, then you have failed.

- When writing a fantasy, the MC can either be male or female, but they must either be half-elf, or fairy, or some other mythical creature and be the only one. What's the fun in the MC being a normal person while a secondary character gets all the fun?

- Oh, and they must be fantastically skilled in the means of archery or swordfighting; or have magical powers that only they possess. NO ONE else.

((Hmm, that's all I can think of. Not the most original list, but then again, in an anti-guide, that's kinda the point. xD))

((Edit: I did think of another one. I have to write it, or I'll forget it again.))

- Remember kids, the best kind of romance story goes a little somethin' like this:
1.) A likes B, but thinks they can't have B.
2.) Angst, angst, angst
3.) A tells C, who, in turn, breaks their promise to A, and tells B.
4.) B randomly tells A that they feel the same way.
5.) Sex, sex, SEX! (That's the one thing the audience likes reading the most, anyway. Might as well skip steps 1-4)
Oh, and this all happens within one page, except for the depressing angst part which gets about ten million pages to itself. 'Cause the reader loves teenage angst. (Or any type, really, but adults aren't sad; just teens.)

Don't forget that if the male quarterback in high school must be hated, it's always by the lead cheerleader who had the hots for him, finally get's asked out by him, and get's warned by a mysterious nobody what a creep he is, then is stupid enough to go out to some deserted place with him, and almost get's raped, because everyone knows you can't just stop at massive cheater, the hot quarterback that everyone wants to get with MUST be a rapist!

At this point, the cheerleader must realize how wrong she was for telling Miss Nobody to get bent, and after which, they must become BFF's, because of course, head cheerleader must ditch her lifetime friends immediately, rather than embarrass herself by telling them what a creep the guy really is because they've all secretly got the hots for the quarterback too and could never ever POSSIBLY believe her.

Head Cheerleader is than known as the outsider who used to be popular but now everyone hates because she refuses to BE a cheerleader, and now dresses either really plain, or decides to shave her head, and/or randomly become a goth, because everyone knows Cheerleaders are neither bald nor goth.

If you write this, everyone will read your story, trust me.

[Clare_N]

If you want to write about a gothic character, model them on the infamous Ebony (AKA Enoby) Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way from the equally infamous "fanfic" called "My Immortal".