The Anti-Guide

How do you try to improve your writing?

I try to avoid old, stupid things.	17.5%	[ 2292 ]
I add new things.	14.9%	[ 1951 ]
A combination of both (if one more than the other, pick it).	67.6%	[ 8852 ]
Total Votes:			[ 13095 ]

[-Resurrected Writer-]

LeitaKree

IB Hopeless

Automatic weapons NEVER EVER EVER run out of bullets.

Especially if it's the hero's automatic weapon, except if you need an OMG SUSPENSEFUL!!!! moment.

It never jams, either.

((Then again, almost any moment with a lack of ammo or a jammed gun is bound to be suspenseful))

[Half Baked SF]

LeitaKree

IB Hopeless

Automatic weapons NEVER EVER EVER run out of bullets.

Especially if it's the hero's automatic weapon, except if you need an OMG SUSPENSEFUL!!!! moment.

It never jams, either.

And of course, the villain will never just take that opportunity to just give the fatal shot. No, he'll pick that moment to give a wordy, gloating speech just long enough for the MC to fix whatever problem he has with the gun and start shooting again.

[SoulSalvage]

Never describe what a MC looks like, or an entire race looks like. It adds mystery to the story.

Your MC has the ability to slow time and dodge every bullet in the game...Er, story.

For a suspenseful scene, have your MC dodge every bullet except for the last one, immobilizing their arm or their leg. Then about half a page later, make your MC forget all about the paralyzation and beat the villain's butt.

Mayans still exist in real life. They do, so write about them. A LOT.

[Sir Lampy of Locksley]

SoulSalvage

Never describe what a MC looks like, or an entire race looks like. It adds mystery to the story.

Pr, on the other hand, spend five pages describing your MC, race, and love interest per person.

[-Resurrected Writer-]

Helen Mint

SoulSalvage

Never describe what a MC looks like, or an entire race looks like. It adds mystery to the story.

Pr, on the other hand, spend five pages describing your MC, race, and love interest per person.

There is no "on the other hand." There needs to be five pages or else there's just no possibility of anyone getting a mental image of the character.

[The Velveteen Violinist]

Feel free to use your own "dysfunctional, broken, shitty, messed up" life and experiences to make your characters as tragic and mistreated as you can.

It's called emotional intensity, duh.

[Hawthorne]

-Resurrected Writer-

Helen Mint

SoulSalvage

Never describe what a MC looks like, or an entire race looks like. It adds mystery to the story.

Pr, on the other hand, spend five pages describing your MC, race, and love interest per person.

There is no "on the other hand." There needs to be five pages or else there's just no possibility of anyone getting a mental image of the character.

Oh, pshaw, this character has at least three hands. Each one to press against a different forehead in woe over a tragic past, each past more angst ridden than the last, otherwise it wouldn't be a compelling, dramatic story.

[Misuki Marishima]

Also, when you make a very likable, original, and awesome character, you must feed them to the Grim Reaper. {Why does this always happen to the characters I liiiiiiiikeeeeee?!! D: D: D: It makes me not want to have any favorites anymore, as they are always dying!}

[Half Baked SF]

In a survival horror, any female character who is not the Designated Love Interest must be killed off. Feel free to switch the sexes when necessary.

[Hawthorne]

Misuki Marishima

Also, when you make a very likable, original, and awesome character, you must feed them to the Grim Reaper. {Why does this always happen to the characters I liiiiiiiikeeeeee?!! D: D: D: It makes me not want to have any favorites anymore, as they are always dying!}

Sounds like someone is taking, "Kill your darlings," a little too seriously.

[Sir Lampy of Locksley]

((You know what? I haven't heard anyone mention twi--no, not even gonna start. It's nice, so if we could just keep it that way, thanks!))

The right hand man of the GOOD RULER (tm) is supah evil, probably in leagues with the BIG BAD (tm).

[Rei the Wannabe Wizard]

Helen Mint

((You know what? I haven't heard anyone mention twi--no, not even gonna start. It's nice, so if we could just keep it that way, thanks!))

The right hand man of the GOOD RULER (tm) is supah evil, probably in leagues with the BIG BAD (tm).

And if the right hand man isn't in league with the bad guy, then they ARE the big bad guy... in disguise... Cuz no one can tell the bad guy apart from everyone else with just a pair of glasses. Because glasses are like the ultimate form of disguise.

[Indigo Dagger]

Clark Kent wears glasses.

Superman DOESN'T wear glasses.

COMPLETELY different.

[SoulSalvage]

White Kitsune Rei

Helen Mint

((You know what? I haven't heard anyone mention twi--no, not even gonna start. It's nice, so if we could just keep it that way, thanks!))

The right hand man of the GOOD RULER (tm) is supah evil, probably in leagues with the BIG BAD (tm).

And if the right hand man isn't in league with the bad guy, then they ARE the big bad guy... in disguise... Cuz no one can tell the bad guy apart from everyone else with just a pair of glasses. Because glasses are like the ultimate form of disguise.

ESPECIALLY when they come with the fake nose, moustache, and eyebrows.

Villain + That disguise = Dead Hero

[LeitaKree]

Indigo Dagger

Clark Kent wears glasses.

Superman DOESN'T wear glasses.

COMPLETELY different.

Well DUH.

Robin is also completely different-looking with his little mask, too.