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Does this actually interest you, or are you here because you're bored out of your mind?

Interesting, yes 0.64553267390952 64.6% [ 7962 ]
Not at all...I'm bored out of my mind 0.35446732609048 35.4% [ 4372 ]
Total Votes:[ 12334 ]
Horror and Satire 's avatar

Liberal Prophet

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smutty cannibal prince
Horror and Satire
"Did he say anything?"
"No."
"Strange, that doesn't sound like him."
"He was gagged, actually."
"...that's him alright."

can i adopt this little convo, please?
it's simply so perfect. been struggling all day to come up with something to write about, and then BAM this shows up and gives me a whole idea. c:

Yes, you can.
And thank you whee
PEYA SAKANO's avatar

sonic3ze's Wife

Fashionable Shapeshifter

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"...Why has Cale been standing there, poking himself for the passed 15 minutes?"

"He said he was trying to find his, 'Give a ********' button."

-

"So like...if a guy had sex with an ATM machine and the ATM machine got pregnant, would the kids be half human, half ATM? Or would they just...you know, be little calculators or something? And more importantly, would the guy have to pay child support, or would the ATM already have that covered?" -Me (After finding out about that guy who got arrested for attempting to have sex with an ATM. No. I'm not lying.)

-

"My Teddy bear was molested by a furry once...Understandably, he doesn't like to talk about it." -A friend of mine

-

"Oh, Micheal Jackson's ghost is out there somewhere. It's just invisible because he couldn't get any paler." -That same friend of mine
"I wore my most formal butt plug for the occasion."
hahaha wait what's avatar

Anxious Unicorn

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My dad likes Star Trek. I haven’t seen him in six months, but when I got a pendant with the Starfleet symbol on it for Christmas my first thought was of him. It wasn’t from him, of course, but I thought of him. I wear it every day thinking of him, take it off at night so I won’t damage it, put it on the next morning and think about whether he would be proud. A voice in the back of my mind insists he wouldn’t even notice. My dad has never been one to surprise me.
hahaha wait what's avatar

Anxious Unicorn

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Sometimes you cry so hard you feel as though you’re going to fly into a million pieces. Like the only thing holding you together is the skin that’s cut so raw and the arms you wrap around yourself like someone else is there for you. You cry, and you want to scream as loud as it hurts but you’re so afraid of someone finding you like this that it’s all you can do to keep your breaths as even as possible, keep from squealing as sobs hitch under your ribs. Your mouth opens around a wail that is bigger than you can physically force out of your throat, so you just clap a hand over it and force it back down. You didn’t know it was possible to cry so hard and not make a sound, but you manage because you can’t afford to explain this. Then you hear someone coming, the squeak floorboard or the turn of a doorknob and it’s amazing, it’s crazy, how easy it is to pack it all away again, to wipe your face and close your mouth and swallow and blink and smile.
darkness11924's avatar

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May the embers of your sins smolder forever in your heart, mind and gut. Flaring up at the most inconvenient times in your relationships so you will forever burn in a slow hell of your own making.
=====
Disdain will be your new name and loneliness will be your existence, you will never know the love you had in her because you were too stupid to open your eyes to her existence.
But now, she's dead and its all your fault.
======
B u n n i M e d i c's avatar

Timid Cutie-Pie

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I want to scream. Not just in pain, but in complete distruction. But the cold fact that i can only scream internally where only my inner most thoughts can hear is tearing me apart. While his eyes stare into mine, willing me to hold it together, I would. I want to scream, but as he stares at me a small piece of me wants to cry.

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