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Does this actually interest you, or are you here because you're bored out of your mind?

Interesting, yes 0.64512453198763 64.5% [ 7926 ]
Not at all...I'm bored out of my mind 0.35487546801237 35.5% [ 4360 ]
Total Votes:[ 12286 ]
avearia's avatar

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1: "I'm a dangerous man. I'm like a--like a cheetah. Like a rampaging bear. You better watch out. In fact, I'm so dangerous, I--" (trips and falls over dramatically.) "OW!"
2: "Wow, you're so dangerous, you hurt yourself."

--

Ah, Halloween. It's that special time of year when we all put aside our differences and unite under the common goal of slaughtering the zombie hoarde.

--

"Hey, you guys have class at 11 o'clock, right? According to my watch, you're late." (pause) "Oh wait, I just remembered, my watch is five minutes fast." (pause) "...Actually, you're still late."
Shaholl's avatar

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Real life conversation with a customer at work. I was ringing up their items, which included Halloween costumes and such for her children.

Customer (to her 5 year old son who was heading for the bathroom): Remember, if anyone in there tries anything with you, run out making as much noise as possible. (child leaves, she turns to me) Can't be too careful nowadays, you know?
Me: Uh-huh (continuing ringing)
Customer: Isn't that costume cute? My son just loves Halloween. Once we hit October, it's all he talks about.
Me: Kinda funny...
Customer: I know, he's so precious!
Me: I wasn't talking about that.
Customer: Oh?
Me: I just think it's funny that you gave your son instructions on what to do in case of a *****, but you're encouraging him to love Halloween. It's the one time of the year where children are encouraged to go up to complete strangers and ask for candy, usually at night, where it's harder for the parents to watch them. (still ringing as I'm saying this, yay multitasking!)
Customer: Um...
Me: Almost makes you paranoid, huh? (s**t-eating walmart grin)

Plus: She didn't report me to management
Minus: The kid is probably not going trick-or-treating this year.
AoibhealDragonheart's avatar

Fashionable Prophet

Shaholl
Real life conversation with a customer at work. I was ringing up their items, which included Halloween costumes and such for her children.

Customer (to her 5 year old son who was heading for the bathroom): Remember, if anyone in there tries anything with you, run out making as much noise as possible. (child leaves, she turns to me) Can't be too careful nowadays, you know?
Me: Uh-huh (continuing ringing)
Customer: Isn't that costume cute? My son just loves Halloween. Once we hit October, it's all he talks about.
Me: Kinda funny...
Customer: I know, he's so precious!
Me: I wasn't talking about that.
Customer: Oh?
Me: I just think it's funny that you gave your son instructions on what to do in case of a *****, but you're encouraging him to love Halloween. It's the one time of the year where children are encouraged to go up to complete strangers and ask for candy, usually at night, where it's harder for the parents to watch them. (still ringing as I'm saying this, yay multitasking!)
Customer: Um...
Me: Almost makes you paranoid, huh? (s**t-eating walmart grin)

Plus: She didn't report me to management
Minus: The kid is probably not going trick-or-treating this year.


Her not reporting you might be a good thing but, imagine if it was the cause of some parent group dedicated to the safety of children from banning Halloween forever!? D;

Though this did make me chuckle a bit :3
Misuki Marishima's avatar

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"Most people want candy for Halloween. I want beer."

"Don't you think it's weird?"
"What's weird?"
"How yesterday, we were in the exact same spot asking the same exact questions?"
"... That IS weird."
"Like, Twilight Zone weird."
Mythical Morning's avatar

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"She'll never love you the way I want to".

Found that on a bus and it really spoke to me.
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"There is no redemption without remorse"

"Call me when you need me, you'll never need me so you'll never call"

and

"Half and Half" (lol inside joke)
ilafatyu's avatar

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"Those who can, do. Those who can't, try."

"That looks suspiciously like something I'm going to steal."
red lavender nightfall's avatar

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the wind gently swept over the fields of newly sprouted lavender, scarlet from the fallen's blood

only those who dream can come to terms with reality

for you i left, i let go, you gifted me with lonely days.

my head's a mess, my heart's in line, love, the inescapable curse
Welcome to the dark side. We've been expecting you.
Mythical Morning's avatar

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"Why you? Because you’re amazing, beautiful, and you shine so bright, some days I wonder if I’ll turn blind"

"People like me? People like you? Don’t cheapen what we have. I’m me, you’re you; we’re us, not others".
Misuki Marishima's avatar

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"You're a true fool! You'd risk your reputation- your very life for a group of forsaken souls that would do naught but poison the country we've fought and nearly died for?!"
"Poison? I only believe that those like you are poisonous! People who don't accept change for the greater good are what hold us from being as great as we could be!"
"They are the Lord's rightful possessions! You have your own! You think you're so holy to decide who can have people and who can't?"
"My servants are well paid for and live within my home! Do not mistaken me for the slave-holder who bought your sword!"
"And that is how you and I are so different, even though we once rallied under the same banner. You never had eyes for the greater good, to know that some people need to be kept in place!"
"I'll so no more freedom taken in the name of "good!" It's only when people break from their shackles that we will truly have Enlightenment!"
"Heresy! I'll have no more of your idealistic, foolish words. We fight for the last time, old friend!"
"It's a shame that it must be the last, but so be it!"
xXForeverxFallenxNyxXx's avatar

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....In Soviet Russia... ugly red headed step child beat YOU!!!

IDK. screamed it at my homecoming game the other day... had people doubled over laughing cuz it was RIGHT as some guy from the other school came running out...with red hair... and the last name "Denikov" XDXD
xXForeverxFallenxNyxXx's avatar

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LiteratureGirl
"Why you? Because you’re amazing, beautiful, and you shine so bright, some days I wonder if I’ll turn blind"

"People like me? People like you? Don’t cheapen what we have. I’m me, you’re you; we’re us, not others".


is this yours or did it come from somewhere?
(And if its yours, i know where this would fit...in a book im writing. could i use it? i would give you credit if you wish...)
Mythical Morning's avatar

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xXForeverxFallenxNyxXx
LiteratureGirl
"Why you? Because you’re amazing, beautiful, and you shine so bright, some days I wonder if I’ll turn blind"

"People like me? People like you? Don’t cheapen what we have. I’m me, you’re you; we’re us, not others".


is this yours or did it come from somewhere?
(And if its yours, i know where this would fit...in a book im writing. could i use it? i would give you credit if you wish...)


Yeah I came up iwht it, but you can totally use it.
aaralynclaire's avatar

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Nobody's perfect, well there was this one guy but he died.


I have no idea where this quote came from, but i like it! biggrin

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