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Suiseiten's avatar

Beloved Shapeshifter

In a Maury Povitch tone about Renesmee:
"The Results are in. Edward, you are NOT the father!"
personwholikescookiezX3's avatar

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Report him as a child molester.
Convince him that friendship is the best thing ever.
Keep talking to him about friendship.
Make him listen to all your friendship speeches.
Nobody Famous's avatar

Quotable Prophet

Install a flamethrower as a security device on Bella's window and set it to automatically go off for when he tries to enter.
Rogue Destiny's avatar

Versatile Hunter

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Wow, you people are creative. biggrin Keep going! I'm still trying to make the list to where everyone can see themselves credited, but I'm not sure if anyone can see that. :/

PM Nightfall if you're not able to see your name.

Any who, KEEP GOING!!!!
Suiseiten's avatar

Beloved Shapeshifter

Sing "Every Sperm is Sacred."

Wave a vial of glitter in front of him and say, "This vial was Rosalie. You're next."

Ask him how a corpse can reproduce. Kinda coincides with the question of Renesmee's paternity.

Ask him about his p***s.
Rogue Destiny's avatar

Versatile Hunter

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Suiseiten
Sing "Every Sperm is Sacred."

Wave a vial of glitter in front of him and say, "This vial was Rosalie. You're next."

Ask him how a corpse can reproduce. Kinda coincides with the question of Renesmee's paternity.

Ask him about his p***s.


How long it is or how short? xD
Suiseiten's avatar

Beloved Shapeshifter

NightfallDuet
Suiseiten
Sing "Every Sperm is Sacred."

Wave a vial of glitter in front of him and say, "This vial was Rosalie. You're next."

Ask him how a corpse can reproduce. Kinda coincides with the question of Renesmee's paternity.

Ask him about his p***s.


How long it is or how short? xD
That and if it'd be like riding an ice cube. :3
personwholikescookiezX3's avatar

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Station police officers around Bella's room.
Suiseiten's avatar

Beloved Shapeshifter

Ask him what brand of body glitter he uses.
Ask him if his mom is Tinkerbell or Navi.
Cosplay as Navi and everytime he looks to you, say, "Hey!", "Listen!", and/ or "Look out!"
Talk to him in riddles.
TheQuietRiversRage's avatar

Manly Man-Lover

Serenade him with "Ice Ice Baby."
-Point out Charlie's mustache. Comment about how epic it is. Remind Edward why he can't have one.
-Steal his a**l beads. blame the spawn.
-Download something you know to be a Trojan onto his computer. Giving a hacker or two remote access wouls also be fun to watch. Take bets on which hacker will annoy him most.
-Grill a slab of ribs in the backyard. If Edward asks, tell him his wife was good for something, after all.
-Load a full kindergarten class with caffeine and release them on an unsuspecting Edward.
-Tell him Bela Lugosi wants a word.
-Threaten to call Molly Weasley on his wife.
-Set up a credit card in his name and buy nothing but little pink thongs and lacey bras with it. Makeup and tampons are also good items.
-Cover his bed with used tampons.
-Knock over his card castles when he's about to put the last card on. do this several times a day.
-Put Bella and Kagome Higurashi in a whining contest.
-Invite River Song over. Amy and Rory would be fun as well.
-Send him to the DMV. Four hours after it opens.
Insane Scarheaded Whovian
-Set up a credit card in his name and buy nothing but little pink thongs and lacey bras with it. Makeup and tampons are also good items.
You need to buy them on the internet and shipped them to him by mail.
Rogue Destiny's avatar

Versatile Hunter

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Quote:
-Put Bella and Kagome Higurashi in a whining contest.


Kagome isn't THAT bad. I mean, she doesn't b***h about the weather, the villages' conditions, or whatever. :/ At least, from what I heard about the show, she doesn't do it that much.

Well, it's been awhile since I've seen the show and read the manga, but I don't really recall her being extremely whiny, just medium whiny, I guess.

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