I regret not getting to speak on every awesome, borderline troll worthy, catchy comeback that people just opened up for with the perfect wording and timing out of personal kindness and fear of trouble.
I don't bathe for a few days when I know I won't be doing anything important or seeing any non-family people; it saves water. I hit my brother to make my dog upset; it's really funny because the dog can't hurt me. I went on a date with this one guy because there was a movie I wanted to see; I wasn't interested in the guy.
Now that I look back on it, I regret paying for the snacks even though he paid for the tickets. He comes from a rich family and I don't. >__<
EDIT: I also signed my "soul" over to my friend a few years ago.
Listen up, because I'm only going to say this once.
It's something I've never told anyone: not my family, not my friends. My partners, my Fujicakes, not even my pet rock Ezellohar (may his soul rest in peace), have any idea what I'm about to say. I don't think I need to tell you that this has been a secret--SHEE-EE-KU-REH-TOH--all my life.
And I'm in no big hurry to say it, either! This is not something I'm up in a huff about getting off of my chest, you dig? I've spent a lot of time--my good, valuable time, thank you, none of that 'waiting in the dentist's office' stuff--thinking about this. A lot of cigarettes and pots of coffee died to make this confession, so you'd better listen to me!
Okay... here goes:
I... *licks his lips* Uh, well, sometimes, no--dammit! Hold on a minute, let me start again.