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I can't get this out of my head. My brother finished college, married, happy life, etc blah blah blah. My Dad worked his way from being at the bottom to having all his college and med school paid for and taking care of five children. (Including me)

So my situation is that I feel awful because I was a college drop out. REALLY early. Like, no credits to my name. I dropped out and enlisted in the U.S. Army. I've deployed once and came back safe and sound.

I can't help but feel like no matter what I do I'll never be good enough for my parents. Or anyone for that matter. It's odd that since I left my home that those close to me seem distant and those distant have become closer.

This Army thing is a cruel thing and I'm lovin' it oddly.

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don't chase after happiness your heart will never unclench

Loyal Rogue

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thing is.... I actually sympathize with you. I constantly feel like I just don't "add up" to expectations. I am 24 years old with no job, still living with my parents. failed half my classes in college. I'm the scrawny, awkward, gay member of the family, with a police record. I'm the problem child. I have the radical views. I'm the violent one. my younger brother works two jobs, and is a mixed martial artist. he's been in the rankings at international tournaments. he's about to start going pro MMA.

I can kinda get how being in the army can make you feel like you've got more of a purpose than you do outside of it. ya know? I may not be a soldier myself, but I still understand how being part of something bigger can be a sort of a comfort to you, even when it's grueling or miserable.

S m u s h a's Husband

Proxy Fatcat

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dude you ******** fought for our country, are you kidding me? even if you weren't in combat it's still a pretty huge risk you took and i'm grateful to you. maybe you could join an army support group and become friends with other people in the military. that way you have a support system with people who share similar interests.

and quit comparing yourself to other people!!! nobody grows up with the same experiences as anyone else. you are shaped by your environment. get out and do positive things, because the longer you stay focusing on the negatives, the longer you're going to be so hard on yourself and depressed. just remember, you could always be worse off

Wheezing Fatcat

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push through it, or take inspiration from your doubt to improve yourself
find a way to motivate yourself, basically
and use that to work your way up to a higher position in the military

Divorced Widow

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Dude you're not the only one, Im a single mom and I have no work experience or anything like that. Kinda hard since I have no one to watch my baby girl =__=

But dude just keep applying yourself and maybe have you dad help you find a job.

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Why don't you try going back to school?
Or reenlist.

Wheezing Prophet

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were your parents paying for your college?

Feral Phantom

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ach. I'm sorry, I think its real f'cked up that a lot of soldiers don't get the recognition they deserve. A lot get left behind (my brother was 1st infantry) so thanks for all you've done.

now then, as unfortunate as it is, if you are trying to live up to someone elses standards, you will never meet them. My oldest brother has a PhD , my sister is in engineering, my other brother a war hero, and my oldest sister has the sweetest personality youd ever meet. I have none of these, I dropped out at 16 for my GED and have been working and pursuing my comics career. I used to be severely depressed, but you know what I say to make me feel better when it seems everyone is miles ahead of me? "fock em" you move at your own pace, and you take the paths you ultimately need to take.

that may not be the advice or support you're looking for, but you got to stay strong for you, succeed for YOU. realizing this has been one of my only driving forces, family weighs heavy on you, but theyre not living your life, you are.... kay anyway, hope that helped, good luck friend- o

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Then get better.

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Don't let anyone let you feel like that. You fought for your country. That alone is enough to be proud of yourself. Screw what everyone else thinks. I've felt like I'm not good enough for years. My ex (the father of my kids) told me about 5 years ago when our oldest was 7 months old that I was a shitty mother. I believed him and have let it beat me up for years. It took a while but I finally stood up for myself and left him. I've felt like I'm a bad mother, daughter, sister, and friend. I've felt isolated and depressed and I've had enough. Yeah I make very little money, live with my parents (I'm 27), have a ton of debt but I'm making changes and bettering myself for my kids. I've discovered that there's only 2 people whose opinions of me matter now and that's my 2 amazing boys. They love me and I do my best to provide for them and support then in every way. To me that's all that matters. You just need to figure out whose opinion matters to you and it should only be someone who lifts you up, not someone who drags you down.

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Not Flynn
Stop trying to please your parents and find what you wanna do

D'awww, missed us huh?

Anxious Prophet

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I have a cousin who makes me feel this way sometimes. You just have to remember you are your own man, the sum of expectations that you likely fabricated yourself.

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You'll find what suits you best. My dad has been serving in the military for 28 years now and recently retired. He joined because it was his passionate and got him very far, so there's nothing wrong with loving the military life, it certainly has it's benefits and you can go very far when you're passionate about it.
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