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Good day, EI mavens! This week's update is loaded with two big developments, thanks in part to a new piece of machinery we have in the lab, the EVOLIAC-700! It's a state of the art EI computing device that can analyze Evolving Item data faster than anyone on my research team ever could. It reads a series of several hundred punch cards and can perform in 30 minutes a barrage of calculations that would take an average researcher nearly 40 minutes! Anyhow, let's have a look at what's new this week:

S-Pop Club continues this week, bolstered by the critical success of their previous school-inspired hit. The gang is now gearing up to shoot a video for their next hit, the much edgier "Hit Them Over Hard."

Timmy has saved up and bought himself a ride, the Krazy Wheels Stallion GT. It seems a tad tiny in this reporter's opinion, and the electric motor inside it only tops out at about walking speed, anyway. I know he's thinking his friends will be impressed, but I just hope they don't ask him for rides farther out than the end of the block or he might not have enough juice to get back!

That's it for now! The EVOLIAC-700 continues to hum along dutifully, only mangling a handful of punch cards and billowing smoke a single time. According to the manual, that means a job well done! What'd you think about these two new developments? Head over to the weekly EI poll and vote for your favorite!