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Why are these guys attracted to me or these people in general?

all my life i've been like the silver metal, always second place... i've never had any true, and forever friends... the few i actually thought i was ended up ignoring me completely the moment one or the other moved out of town...

a person i thought was my very best friend, who moved outta town just before we started high school sent me a wedding invite via myspace the day before her wedding, OMG i was so pissed... we're now friends on FB, and i've never mentioned that, but it just told me how very far a part we are...

another person i was close to completely ignored me when i came back(after moving away the previous year) for her graduation... she completely blew me off and nearly left me stranded in the middle of the desert.

one girl i grew up all the way through school with always became my best friend when there wasn't a new girl in town... i was always the back up plan...

and then there's the relationships with guys...

the first real one was two year older, but in the same grade as me... he had a crappy family, bounced around a lot, and had a couple of learning disorders, so i understood... it took a while to get started, but it was nice... at time he'd cuddle a little too much and stepped on my toes, but i lived with it 'cause i thought i loved him... we brokeup 'cause he was turning 18 and wanted to get away from his step mom, but couldn't afford to live on his own, yet... we started talking again two years later and he came out to visit... at the time i realized while i grew up in age he seemed to grow down twice as much... he was so immature!

after i moved to FL i met a guy online who know people from where i moved from, we seemed to really click, but my mom sabtoged many of my chances of meeting the guy in person, so he just gave up and deleted me from everything...

i dated this one guy twice, the first with my mom... after the second date he sent a dozen red roses to my house! seriously, who does that after the second date? it freaked me out completely so i never contacted him again...

after moving to FL, losing my friends back home, and dealing with the last two guys... i was thoroughly depressed, and i met another guy online... he basically offered me an exscape, he lived in CO and he had room, so i went... the following day i was basically on a flight back to FL... he was furious and yelled at me constantly via IMing... we stopped talking until a few years later on FB, and we started making plans for a real move and a real relationship... over a few months time though he became really obsessive and demanding, bordering an emotionally abusive line... i cut all ties with him and then he proposed to me. i still said no...

now just over the last month i've been talking with a guy who hit me up on FB... he seemed nice but he never really answered any of my more intrusive questions. I'd ask what's his favorite movie, and he'd say i like scary movies, but nothing definate... after a long chat today, i'm realizing his story isn't straight and something is definately up/wrong...

i've always had a hard time trusting and people have told me because i don't trust no one can get close to me, but when i do let my walls down it's always something that makes me put up a stronger and harder wall... why can't i just meet someone good for once?

sorry for the WOT...

You seem to be going about getting a boyfriend in poor ways; you delve in to dating FAR too fast, and way before you really know the guy too well.

You seem to just go from guy to guy, dating whomever seems to be somewhat cute, charming, and nice. Instead of just meeting guys, talking to them on facebook kind of, and starting to date them, you should make MALE FRIENDS first.

Try making some male friends, and get to know them as FRIENDS for a few months first, don't just jump into a relationship so fast. When you do decide to date, start it casually, and let him know you want casual dating for a while. For a couple months, you just go on casual dates, no making out, no obsessive behavior, no sex, etc; you're casual. You MIGHT kiss, hold hands, etc, but you aren't going to get too intimate.

So you start as friends for a while, THEN casually date; if the guy you're dating is willing to date you casually for a couple months, WAIT for the heavy making out, sex, real relationship s**t, etc. Then he has patience, and you can move to a full relationship if you want.

All in all, you need to really get to know the guys better before you date them, make what you want out of a relationship clear, and stop just dating guys and dating guys. Try to date people you GENUINELY LIKE AND CLICK WITH. People you have a lot of interests with, etc.

Also, I think you get crept out too easily; your idea of obsessive might be a little excessive. It seems like when guys start showing genuine care for you, you shut him out because you think he is moving too fast.

Not his fault, you have to TALK to the guys, and get to know them, and they need to know you. Refer to what I said before.

Still no reason to be offended.

What does it matter if it's red roses or pink peonies? It's still just a gesture of affection.

I agree with Namekuji though, you really should make friends before you date, it makes things a lot easier than going on a date with a basic stranger. Plus, you don't get hit with curve balls as often.

most of these relationships have a year or few between them. I don't hop from guy to guy...

in general i have a hard time making friends in the first place, so to make guy friends with possible date in the future is just as hard... i try though, making friends with guys at work and my bro's friends...

you say do casual dating... is seeing the pink panther and walking around a mall casual enough? 'cause i did, and then i got a dozen red roses the next day... so now i'm not so sure...

my little obsessive friend texted me continuiously for three weeks after i said it's over... he texted me say things like 'we'll get married', 'i WILL move in with him', 'i love you' and more... he thought it was a sin to read a book or sleep at night, i was to text him morning noon and night! I still get a random text from him asking me to marry him...

It happens.

Do you have any interests? That might be a good jumping off point to meeting people and making friends.

movies, skiing, harry potter, horse back riding, dancing(ballet tap jazz), i got plenty of interest... saw a few guys i had a crush on at the movies two, three times a week, but then the jack-butt boss fired a load a people and i haven't seen them since! there a skiing club, but it cost money to join and more money to go to all their events...

i'm starting to make excuses... but i am trying... it's just i always meet the wrong people...

at work they'll all talk about going to a bar or something and i'll ask if i can come too and they look at me like, "Why?" so i don't go, because i know they won't have my back while i'm there...