Welcome to Gaia! ::

Matt's gone to his parents for the weekend, but I have work, so I'm home by myself (except for the roommate when he himself isn't at work.) emo
So work for 9 hours today....then 10-12 tomorrow.
And he disappears home on my first proper day off in weeks; but I have Sims 3, so it's all good, I guess.

So yeah, I'm totally full of crap, but shhhh. I'll be crazy by the time he comes home Monday.

Blaze's vet visit went alright. He's surprisingly not upset about going, though he was like shaking the whole time we were there. It looks like he just has cysts and they aren't bothering him and would pop back up if we removed them so... basically just leave them and watch to make sure they don't get bigger.

My boyfriend is coming here for the weekend! yay! I like getting to stay in my own place... though it always gets so messy since he just sort of dumps his stuff in the middle of the floor. I'm looking forward to thins weekend because we get to see my friends that for once aren't going home and his sister and her new kitty and I don't have any tests next week that I need to be studying for and next week is short anyhow! woo!

I'm sitting here waiting for Micah to call me or get online. I'm kinda home alone and it's scary here. sad I hate being in my house by myself. Plus, I'm feeling really crappy and really paranoid, I thought I just heard my name being called.. By somthing..

Though I do have to say that I'm feeling a bit better on getting married next mont. I was kinda iffy on being a Military wife. I love my fiance with all my heart and I'd die/do anything for him. I can't wait to be his wife, but it's the military part that was kinda-really freaking me out. It's like I told him, I don't exactly want to be a newly married widow. i worry about him all the time and he knows how I feel. I lurk around other threads and I'm talking to a military wife/mommy who knows exactly how I'm feeling. Or at least, I think so. I know I've talked to him about it.

That was my grandfather!
I could imagine being in a relationship like his and my grandmothers. They met while they were both in college, but he had been in the military for 4 years before hand. He did stuff with radios in the Air Force and went to Japan during WW2, but he just taught stuff. I'm pretty sure once they had met he was done with his service. He wasn't really the military/traveling type, but he loved and was good at machines and electronics and whatnot.

My great-grandad fought in both world wars. He was married through both of them and his wife went pretty crazy with worry while he was gone. She developed a phobia of the door bell and the postman and apparently got so scared and worried that it caused her to miscarry their first child. I know I'd be the same. I'd literally worry myself sick. I have huge respect for anyone who manages it without totally freaking out.

Unless I want to be in my mid-30s before I have my first child (I don't) then we will have to have a child while he is in service. We're looking at the next 3-5 years to start trying (when he is in med school). he'll be re-joining for 4 years so they'll pay for med school and pay for him to go, putting him at 30 or 31 when he graduates med school and about 35,36 when he discharges. I don't mind it so much because as medical personnel he'll only be deployed for 3-6 months at a time and will only be in super safe places and helicoptered around from place to place since the military put a ******** ton of money into him, they don't want to break him. I know there's always some risk, but the military does a good job protecting their doctors because they have so few of them (most leave for civilian jobs after their first contract finishes- like Shawn plans to).

Last time he was deployed he was with the doctors that got pampered. He never saw a gun, never fired, was never fired on, and never even feared combat. The doctors didn't even have to convoy in or out- they were flown the entire time. He said he honestly thought that if fire went live the doctors would have been ushered away and patients brought to them very far away from the fire.

I can't see how women who don't travel with their husbands and have frequently deployed MOS's with heavy combat experience have children though. I have a cousin who has two children. The first born while he was in Basic, the second conceived while on leave from Iraq. He was deployed directly out of AIT, home for a month, deployed again, and then volunteered for a third tour. He plans to go career. He has missed his children being babies and the idea of Shawn missing that completely breaks my heart. I can handle him missing small chunks at a time, but the whole thing? I know he wouldn't want that either.