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He doesn't take no for an answer from me.
we've been dating two years, and he only comes home from school friday-sunday.

He's SO clingy and selfish.He feels the need to spend all his free time with me,
which is the WHOLE weekend.

And I want to have time away from him,like...for myself, and to spend with friends.

This is a matter that's come up before, and he just CANT live with not spending time with me.
If it ever does happen that I'm really mean to him and I get to spend time alone or with friends, he's texting me THE WHOLE TIME, trying to get me to go to his house!!!
or,he'll call nonstop.

UGGHHH

PROBLEM!
I'm not sure really what kind of help I'm looking for-just opinions/advice I guess

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Er...talk to him about it?

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I'd run. Far.

Or at least just text back with a "not so much."
Or ignore his calls.

If he won't listen to you, and is encroaching on you like this, just tell him such. Communication is key to a successful relationship.

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we talked about it yesterday.
We didn't really get far.
no compromise....
this has come up before....and I've even tried breaking up with him over it ebfore ( and other things)

well,he also doesnt let me break up with him.

is this,like....considered an abusive reltionship?

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Uhhh... he won't let you break up with him. I don't think its termed abusive if he hasn't hurt you but its not a mentally safe one. He seems like a stalker. like if you did break up with him and started dating other guys he would try and follow you on your dates or pick a fight with the guy. I would tell my parents and see if they can help get a restraining order or something.

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Ecstatic Elizabeth
we talked about it yesterday.
We didn't really get far.
no compromise....
this has come up before....and I've even tried breaking up with him over it ebfore ( and other things)

well,he also doesnt let me break up with him.

is this,like....considered an abusive reltionship?


#1 Send him a E-mail/phone/whatever saying you break up with him.
#2 Tell your parents(Especially your dad)
#3 Wait till he comes to your house and let your dad answer the door
#4 Enjoy.

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Ecstatic Elizabeth
we talked about it yesterday.
We didn't really get far.
no compromise....
this has come up before....and I've even tried breaking up with him over it ebfore ( and other things)

well,he also doesnt let me break up with him.

is this,like....considered an abusive reltionship?


He can't not let you break up with him, saying such is assuming that you need his approval for breaking up.
You don't.
If you want to break up, do so, and then that's it. It's not something that's debatable if you've made up your mind, he doesn't have a say in it.

And he doesn't seem like he's willing to respect you and your wishes, I'd break up if I were you.

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well, I guess I didnt provide enough information.

i've broken up with him before,
and he calls me nonstop
and cries to me nonstop
and he'll show up at my house randomly.

it's weird.

he's too dependant

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Although it iskind of endearing that he believes that you are more important then his friends, he should know that by not giving you space he is ultimately pushing you away.

Perhaps if he noticed that he wouldn't be so clingy with you.

Then again some guys don't see that no matter what you do.

stressed

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Ecstatic Elizabeth
well, I guess I didnt provide enough information.

i've broken up with him before,
and he calls me nonstop
and cries to me nonstop
and he'll show up at my house randomly.

it's weird.

he's too dependant


Like I said earlier:
#1 Break up with him

#2 Tell your parents this guy is not your friend/bf anymore and that he bothers you.
Let your dad answer the door when its him and trust me, he won't come to your house anymore.

#3 Have your parents answer the phone when its him, in the worst case you may need to get a restraining order.

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Alfx
Ecstatic Elizabeth
well, I guess I didnt provide enough information.

i've broken up with him before,
and he calls me nonstop
and cries to me nonstop
and he'll show up at my house randomly.

it's weird.

he's too dependant


Like I said earlier:
#1 Break up with him

#2 Tell your parents this guy is not your friend/bf anymore and that he bothers you.
Let your dad answer the door when its him and trust me, he won't come to your house anymore.

#3 Have your parents answer the phone when its him, in the worst case you may need to get a restraining order.


i don't want to end my relationship with him,we've come so far and grown so much together.i really am in love with him, but i just...value my free time, and he doesnt value his,he likes being with people.

and....i dont have a dad,unfortunately.

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Ecstatic Elizabeth
Alfx
Ecstatic Elizabeth
well, I guess I didnt provide enough information.

i've broken up with him before,
and he calls me nonstop
and cries to me nonstop
and he'll show up at my house randomly.

it's weird.

he's too dependant


Like I said earlier:
#1 Break up with him

#2 Tell your parents this guy is not your friend/bf anymore and that he bothers you.
Let your dad answer the door when its him and trust me, he won't come to your house anymore.

#3 Have your parents answer the phone when its him, in the worst case you may need to get a restraining order.


i don't want to end my relationship with him,we've come so far and grown so much together.i really am in love with him, but i just...value my free time, and he doesnt value his,he likes being with people.

and....i dont have a dad,unfortunately.

I'm sorry.

Then you really need to make him understand.

Did you try to make like a schedule or something like that?
Sounds stupid, but it could work.

That way you could schedule with him all the moments you want to see him and tell him not to try seeing you the rest of the time because you won't be available anyway.

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tell him u want some alone time

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Hmm.......this is sounding like he's waaaaaaaaaaay too dependent on you, but yet he's trying to make all the rules without listening to you. This is bad, and very strange.

Although you love him, this is taking a emotional toll on you (and if he's really not leaving you alone, like with texting you and calling you constantly), you're just gonna have to tell him how you feel. Sort of like "Look, I love you, I really do, but I do need some time for myself as well. I can still hang out with you, but I also want to hang out with my friends as well. My life can't be 100% about you! Can't you understand that?". As one suggested before, maybe have a schedule that's sort of flexible that can work. That's a peaceful way of solving it.

Or, you can just shut your phone off when you go somewhere with your friends; hopefully he'll get the hint that way! smile

If he blows you off and he responds attitude-wise somewhere around the lines of NO YOU CAN'T BREAK UP AND I WON'T LISTEN TO YOUR SUGGESTIONS, then he's pretty much acting like a pile of poo, and it's best just to break up with him for your sanity, at least for a little while; take some time to think about the relationship. If you decide to stay with the break up and he STILL bugs you, get the police involved, or get a restraining order on him.

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Wow... you're mad because he only gets a chance to see you 3 days a week and thus wants to make the most of that time to see you. His *girlfriend*. It sounds like you don't like him very much and should maybe just dump him.
My guy and I live together and still can't get enough time together with school and work. I couldn't imagine only getting a chance to see him 3 days a week, and I know if we were in that situation we would spend those 3 days glued at the hip.
You have the rest of the week that he's away to spend with your friends and have space, so why aren't you taking that opportunity? If it's a matter of homework, stay late after school with your friends to get your homework done and then all go and hang out together.
I think he's completely reasonable to want to spend that little amount of time with you, and that you are probably sick of him as a boyfriend and that's why you think he's being so clingy. Loads of couples spend like part of every afternoon together and don't complain about being clingy.
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