Its called "allowing the past to control your future"
or "not leaving things in the past"
or "refusing to accept change in word definitions and change in the world"
I have ran into a similar situation with a friend cause they were acting silly, and I said back in a joking manner "you are acting like such a f*****t lol"
They said back "PLEASE, do not use that word in from of me"
I was confused, because I never knew it to really be a insult of any kind.
Why is that?
I used to have a gay friend that called people that act silly "faggots" all the time. He taught me that that was what the word could be used for, calling someone that acts silly a "f*****t"
How is it a insult again?
Then again, I am not saying that when a incident happens that we should just roll over it and ignore it....but it shouldn't hang around forever.
Of course, people that have a personal attachment due to loss to that kind of stuff are understandable. That is a different story altogether.