Edward Cullen - Abusive Boyfriend (Eclipse SPOILERS)

Your opinion?

I knew it all along.	61.8%	[ 1576 ]
Good points, but I'm not convinced.	15.4%	[ 393 ]
You're wrong, and I will post my rebuttal.	11.5%	[ 293 ]
But it's True Love!	11.4%	[ 290 ]
Total Votes:			[ 2552 ]

[Gabzilla]

Am I the only one that thinks it's weird that people ask you if you have read the books just because you think they suck? sweatdrop

Anyway, I completely agree with you.

[SuezyMoezy]

I've read this post and was really interested in what all of you guys were talking about. So I wanted to write something myself and realized that I had to make a Gaia account first, so I did (that's how much it grabbed my attention) I agree 100% with Edward being a abusive boyfriend, I've read all four books and have never thought that he wasn't abusive. What annoys me the most is the message Stephenie Meyer send out to her fans, basically telling them to go on and live your life obsessing over a man and having dreams about having sex with him, if that what she calls a heroine I'm surprised she sound more like a whore to me.

[SuezyMoezy]

Gabzilla

Am I the only one that thinks it's weird that people ask you if you have read the books just because you think they suck? sweatdrop

Anyway, I completely agree with you.

Yes, sometimes I feel like throwing a dagger at them!

But instead I simply say, "Yes, and it was a waste of my life." They usually want to start an argument but I tell them no. I've wasted a precious part of my life reading it and now I don't want to waste another precious part of my life arguing about it.

Some of you Twilight fans most be like 'Oh then why are you writing about it know?'

Well simply because talking to a Twihard fan is tiring, there very stubborn and won't admit to their mistake. They keep blabbing about how much they love Edward and how I should love him too. But, having a argument online is easier because I don't have to hear their annoying voice and I could skip the post that I find boring and outrageously dumb.

[Aldorel]

SuezyMoezy

Yes, sometimes I feel like throwing a dagger at them!

Please don't be our first death threat on the Anti side... sad
But I am honored that you liked the essay enough to sign up. Please, stick around, check out Gaia, and if you need any pointers just throw me a PM.


Oh, boy, Exhibit A. This probably belongs in the main Anti thread, but since the video was linked to here...

"SM is a genius. Yuh-huh. Yuh-huh. Yuh-huh."
Repeated affirmation of a point does not make that point true. The assumption that it does is called "Toddler Logic."

"What, you didn't like it, just because... there was no sadness?"
Yes, I think that magically removing all previously established obstacles to the protagonists' happiness warrants dislike of a book. This is called "Deus ex Machina", and is generally considered a Bad Thing. The only exceptions are Greek theatre and the Anti-Guide.

"I want [a vampire baby]. Not a real one, they keep you up and poo and wiz and need feeding... and [with a vampire baby] when you don't have any alcohol you can just tap into their mind and it's like a contact high."
I certainly hope that you never have real children if this is the way you think.

[SuezyMoezy]

Quote:

Please don't be our first death threat on the Anti side... sad

Oh don't worry I won't, I'm not like those crazy fan girls that spit at you or attack your car if you state your opinion about the series.

[xXMyRainFallXx]

wat are you talking about how edward would try to keep bella away, sure he's agitated with him due to the fact that jacob is after bella. wat boyfriend would let some guy just try to take your love away? edward loved bella, he clearly said that she might have been better off with jacob because he didn't want to risk her life. i don't see flaws in edward. i see flaws in bella. how would you feel if ur gf also had feelings for another guy and even went so far as to making out with him. edward left bella because he thought it was BEST for her to live a normal life, but bella is stubborn. edward needed to make bella believe that they can't be together, so in trade for safety, he had to hurt her and it probably hurt edward even more. with bella being an accident magnet, with bella being unstable, with bella being obsessed, i believe that edward did the right things that he could do to try and keep it all safe, ofcourse maybe his ways were a little on the extreme side, but he did it all for love. and edward's jealousy is control you say? bella needed that control. think about it, think about why edward had to step up and control her. bella's bound to get into more trouble without edwards control.

[shmeiliarockie]

First of all, xXMyRainFallXx, please learn how to spell the word "what" correctly. There is an 'h' in there. Some capitalization, punctuation, and paragraph breaks wouldn't be a miss either. My eyes glaze over trying to read all that. But for the sake of debate, I'll try my best. Here goes!

xXMyRainFallXx

wat are you talking about how edward would try to keep bella away, sure he's agitated with him due to the fact that jacob is after bella. wat boyfriend would let some guy just try to take your love away? edward loved bella, he clearly said that she might have been better off with jacob because he didn't want to risk her life.

Okay, now I don't want to misunderstand you, so I'm going to try to rephrase what you're saying so that it makes sense. Please correct me if I get it wrong: What are you talking about? Edward would try to keep Bella away, sure. He's agitated with him (with whom? Bella is not a 'him') due to the fact that Jacob is after Bella. What boyfriend would let some guy just try to take your love away? Edward loved Bella, he clearly said she might have been better off with Jacob because he didn't want to risk her life. Was that right?

So, let's break this down one "arguement" at a time.

Edward would try to keep Bella away, sure. He's agitated with him (with whom? Bella is not a 'him') due to the fact that Jacob is after Bella. What boyfriend would let some guy just try to take your love away?
I'm getting an image of Jacob as a stereotypical cave man here, throwing his woman over his shoulder and carting her off. Does Bella possess a will of her own? Is she mentally capable of making her own decisions? She can refuse Jacob if she wants to. She isn't a small child who needs to be protected. If she wants to hang out with Jacob, she should be able to. It isn't Edward's right to dictate who she talks to. And if she would have decided she would rather date the werewolf, then Edward should have been man enough to let her go. But tada, she didn't choose Jacob, she chose Edward after all. So he overracted and robbed her of the decision when it really wasn't necessary. If he really loved her, he would trust her. But he doesn't trust her. And don't say it was Jacob he didn't trust. He admits to being jealous, and he wouldn't be jealous if he trusted her like he should.

Edward loved Bella, he clearly said she might have been better off with Jacob because he didn't want to risk her life.
This point makes no sense. He clearly said she might have been better off with Jacob, BECAUSE he didn't want to risk her life? I thought the usual arguement is that the werewolves are supposedly more dangerous than the vampires. If that was the case, then leaving her in Jacob's paws would not be the best thing for her. However, I do believe that the vampires are more dangerous, because Jasper tried to eat her. That never happened around the wolf pack. I'm not sure if that's what you meant. If he thought Bella was better off with Jacob, why did he get back together with her? I'm confused. Please clarify, if you'd be so kind.

xXMyRainFallXx

i don't see flaws in edward. i see flaws in bella.

You don't want to see flaws in Edward. Therefore, you don't. You see flaws in Bella, because you are not in love with Bella.

xXMyRainFallXx

how would you feel if ur gf also had feelings for another guy and even went so far as to making out with him.

I thought Jacob was her best friend, not her love interest. Sure, she decides she has more than friendly feelings for him, but only after he forced himself on her twice. That's Stockholme Syndrome, not love. Edward should know that. The fact that he doesn't only proves he has a boat load of insecurities, and doesn't trust his girlfriend. Besides, you're blaming the victim, which is never a good thing. She never actively hunted out Jacob with the intent to make out with him. Let me reiterate, he forced himself on her. There is a BIG difference.

xXMyRainFallXx

edward left bella because he thought it was BEST for her to live a normal life, but bella is stubborn.

It's not his place to decide what's best for her. It's her life, and her right to make stupid decisions if she wants to.

xXMyRainFallXx

edward needed to make bella believe that they can't be together, so in trade for safety, he had to hurt her

But it didn't stop her from falling into harm's way, it made her actively seek out trouble. That's something she never did before he left her. If you were trying to say the end justifies the means, you picked a terrible example.

xXMyRainFallXx

and it probably hurt edward even more.

Bull. He isn't the one who fell into a catatonic state for several months, and then put himself into numerous dangerous situations just to hear her voice. He didn't curl into a ball on the forest floor and simply shut down until someone found him. Bella had the short end of the stick in that situation, hands down.

xXMyRainFallXx

with bella being an accident magnet

I've said it before, she was never a danger magnet until she met him. It may not directly be his fault, but she was fine until he came into her life.

xXMyRainFallXx

with bella being unstable

If he knew she was unstable, he should have never left because he would have known it would unhinge her. If he knew that and did it anyway, he was being unnecessarily cruel to her. And that's not something good boyfriends do.

xXMyRainFallXx

with bella being obsessed

Again, he should have known what his leaving would do to her. This does not prove your point at all. Quite the opposite, in fact.

xXMyRainFallXx

i believe that edward did the right things that he could do to try and keep it all safe

Keep 'it' safe? What's it? Bella's a 'she'. So, let's review: He knew she was emotionally unstable, as well as unhealthily obsessed with him. So, of course, leaving her is the best thing for her? Only if it's Opposite Day. It clearly didn't make her safe, it made her constantly put herself into dangerous situations AND hallucinate. Great job, Edward!

xXMyRainFallXx

ofcourse maybe his ways were a little on the extreme side, but he did it all for love.

"He only hurts me 'cause he loves me." That's all I'm saying.

xXMyRainFallXx

and edward's jealousy is control you say? bella needed that control. think about it, think about why edward had to step up and control her.

Oh yes, Edward, put your woman in line. She clearly is too stupid or too infantile to make ANY decisions on her own. She needs you, her big strapping man, to make them for her. Uh-huh. Yay for justifying abuse! Way to blame the victim AGAIN, xXMyRainFallXx. Way to go.

xXMyRainFallXx

bella's bound to get into more trouble without edwards control.

She did just fine in the seventeen years of her life before she moved to Forks. Just throwing that out there.

[Commander Oblivious]

I typed Edward Cullen is an abusive boyfriend into google and this was the top result.

Major lulz.

[Korrye]

This is just my two cents worth;

We don't know Edward's side of the story.
We can't say that he's abusive because we don't know what he's thinking when he's doing things.

Part of my reason as to why he is not abusive; Edward becomes protective of Bella when he hears what other people are thinking about her. When she was dancing at the prom with Jacob, Jacob was probably thinking of Bella in a way that Edward doesn't want him to. In Eclipse we see this more and more because Edward sees how close Bella has gotten to Jacob but also that Jacob thinks that there is more to him and Bella.

Edward is a flawed character. He feels jealousy and acts spontaneously. More often than not it appears as if he's acting without thinking.

But to truly justify every argument in this thread you would have to hear the whole story through Edward's perspective.

-End

[Commander Oblivious]

Korrye

This is just my two cents worth;

We don't know Edward's side of the story.
We can't say that he's abusive because we don't know what he's thinking when he's doing things.

Part of my reason as to why he is not abusive; Edward becomes protective of Bella when he hears what other people are thinking about her. When she was dancing at the prom with Jacob, Jacob was probably thinking of Bella in a way that Edward doesn't want him to. In Eclipse we see this more and more because Edward sees how close Bella has gotten to Jacob but also that Jacob thinks that there is more to him and Bella.

Edward is a flawed character. He feels jealousy and acts spontaneously. More often than not it appears as if he's acting without thinking.

But to truly justify every argument in this thread you would have to hear the whole story through Edward's perspective.

-End

Look at your average abusive relationship. A girl is the victim here- you can tell this without needing to know his thoughts, because whether he did it with good intentions or not, it's still abusive. You can see she's in a bad spot, and you can see he's not a good guy.

If you're too obsessed over the guy, though, everything he does will be romantic and fun and wonderful, despite it still being abusive. You don't need to know his views.

[Chiyo_2500]

you people are crazy if edward cullen were real he would be the most amazing person to have as a boyfriend i would let him change me anyday in a heartbeat

[Strawberriekey]

((A warning, I'm arguing for Edward here, but since I'm a fair person, I agree with both sides kind of, I hope you can follow what I'm saying anyway...))

Well... This is an interesting conversation... I happened upon this thread via the Anti-Guide, someone mentioned it and I thought I'd look into it. You make very good points, I'll admit that much. I always thought that Edward had characteristics of an abusive boyfriend.

On the other hand, I am bias, because I DO like the books ((for shame for me)). But this is mainly about Edward and his direct corolation with being an "abusive boyfriend" so; despite the continuing arguement for it (and I've seen it a lot in this thread) Edward is a vampire, he spent what, a century without anything to really capture his interest. In comes Bella, someone whose mind he can't read, a fascination. His obsession at her can be explained in part here. (Not saying it's right but it can be explained.

Secondly, his overprotectiveness can be in part toward Bella's continuous "mishaps" (which by the way is IMPOSSIBLE to have all that crap happen to a person! I mean really... *cough* anyway). Bella + werewolf = BAD. Even though she is friends with Jacob, he is a risk. As seen by Edward, he could phase and kill her. This is demonstrated in New Moon when Jacob confronts the rest of the pack and Paul goes to attack her. Not Jacob, no, but again later, Jacob almost phases when Bella tells him she plans to become a vampire soon. And again in Breaking Dawn when she mentions that she does get a "real honeymoon". So Edward's fear for her, I think, is based on these things. He is jealous, but many men and women do get jealous. His is much more vivid, but Meyer explains this in part when she mentions how much stronger emotions are for him because he's lived in a nonexistant way for so long.

((few that was a long paragraph, sorry for not breaking it up more))

Thirdly, Edward has hurt Bella, both physically and mentally. So first, I'll discuss the physical points. Physically, there are quite a few instances where Edward hurts Bella, but I'm going to focus on the "honeymoon". Edward was plain stupid here, I'll admit that, Jacob was right they shouldn't have tried it. But, they both knew the risks and considering what it COULD have been (Bella ripped to pieces/bitten and sucked dry) the outcome wasn't too horrible. A few unintentional bruises, no that bad, especially since they were unintentional. Most abuse is done from anger, Edward wasn't angry here, he was... erm... well, you know. Besides this, most women are a little sore after "doing the deed" and as mentioned being with a vampire is a lot more difficult.

Mentally, when Edward leaves Bella she goes into depression. The isolation that Edward inflicts upon Bella as you put, is in part. I don't think Edward realy did anything about it. Encouraging it? Perhaps a little, but she was and is good friends with Angela (I'm pretty sure, I can't remember the exact name at the moment)until the end. She even consults her later in Eclipse about Edward and the jealousy. ((which honestly at this point Edward should have been a lot better at handling it... but anyway.)) So she wasn't completely isolated, she still had friends and Jessica DID turn out to be a shallow person, only wanting to be friends with Bella because she was popular, same goes for the other girl (damn it I'm bad at names today). So that consults for that arguement...


((Well I'm hungry, I have my Chicken in peanut sauce sitting next to me and I'm going to EAT IT!!! I'll put up more later.))

[Tannbanan]

This is my perspective as a fanguy of the series:
Edward is a flawed character and as readers, we can see that. Bella can't, because she loves him. Obviously he's going to be jealous; Jacob has told Bella repeatedly that he is in love with her and any boyfriend would.
My opinion on the example you used to say that Edward forbade Bella from seeing Jacob: He was much more concerned with Bella's physical safety than a chance of infidelity; a perfectly rational fear considering Jacob is a very emotionally unstable werewolf and could've phased at any moment around her (just like what happened to Emily).
He never meant to intentionally hurt Bella, and to say he is abusive is far fetched to say the least.

[tiny britini]

this is retarded.
edward LOVES her!!!!!
when he cuts in to dance with bella again, she is releived for his interruption.
why are you people so against him?!? BELLA wants EDWARD!! she loves him too . this isnt a one way thing. and who cares? its a STORY for crying out loud!! and if you really dont like edward, i wouldnt recomend reading the last book. maybe you should read the Twilight book from edwards point of view at: stepheniemeyer.com. the author wrote it and it shows how edward really cares for bella. read that and then think about how you feel about edward.

[shmeiliarockie]

tiny britini

and who cares?

Go back a page, dear. I explained that one very well already, and I'm not going to repeat myself.

tiny britini

maybe you should read the Twilight book from edwards point of view at: stepheniemeyer.com. the author wrote it and it shows how edward really cares for bella. read that and then think about how you feel about edward.

You're not serious, right? Did you read the part where Edward oiled her window so it wouldn't squeak, thus allowing him to slip into her room, sit in her rocking chair and watch her sleep for a long period of time without her even knowing it? And look, I brought the quotes to prove it!

Edward

I tried the window, and it was not locked, though it stuck due to long disuse. I slid it slowly aside, cringing at each faint groan of the metal frame. I would have to find some oil for next time...

Edward

I wanted very much to go read the titles of her books and CDs, but I'd promised myself that I would keep my distance; instead, I went to sit in the old rocking chair in the far corner of the room.

Edward

Bella was sleeping peacefully when I climbed up to her bedroom window early Monday morning. I'd remembered oil this time, and the window now moved silently out of my way.

Bella

I opened the window — surprised when it opened silently, without sticking, not having opened it in who knows how many years — and sucked in the relatively dry air.

Let me say this again, in case you missed it. She didn't know he oiled her window so he could sit in her room and watch her sleep without rousing her. He wanted to rummage about in her personal belongings without her permission. That's not romantic, that's creepy as all get out! What Edward did in Midnight Sun was far, far worse than simply standing outside and watching her as we previously thought. It takes stalking to a whole different level, that of breaking and entering. What if it was Mike who was climbing in her window? I doubt you'd think it was so romantic then.

That's a far cry from changing my mind about his abusiveness, I must say. If anything, Midnight Sun is simply more fuel to the fire.

When she's angry, he likens her to a newborn kitten, thus invalidating that anger. Aww, isn't she so cute? All riled up like that, it's so pathetic he thinks it's adorable. Sorry, but not taking your SO's anger seriously? That's a sign of being an emotional abuser.

He wants to "protect" her from Jessica's eeeevil social climbing thoughts, and Mike's vulgar intent to date her. (Isolating her from her friends!) In some ways that is even more damning than him disabling her car so she can't see Jacob, because at least then he has an excuse that Jacob is an eeeevil werewolf who will maul her at the first opportunity (it's not at all because Jacob's a very good male friend with whom Bella likes to hang out, no siree). But with Jessica and Mike? What's his excuse there? Are they going to viciously disfigure her face or imprint on her or what-have-you?

My tea leaves say no.