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There is this girl her name is Arya, she sits and reads her books all alone under a cherry blossom tree, thinking about how she could make herself disappear. As she is reading deeper and deeper into her book she images herself being the girl she reads about every day, she walks around with her hair let down, long golden blond hair, her blue eyes ablaze in the moon lit night. She is a simple stable girl living life the best she can helping out her family as much as she can. Then one day she meet this boy he is tall and has brown hair and brown eyes, he looks as if he is lost and cant find his way back from where he came. she walks over to the boy and hears him crying, so she asks him "whats wrong?". the boy looks up and answers her with a sad look on his face and says he was looking for his mother she had gone missing a few days ago and hasn't come home. She helps the boy up and brings him home and when she walks in the door, as she says to her family "i would like you all to meet my new friend his name is Leland". as she is telling her family where she met him and why he is there her mother looks at her and say "sweet heart it nice that you have and imaginary friend but you should go up to you room and get ready for bed".she tells her mom that her is not imaginary and that he is standing right next to her, her mom yells at her and tells her to go to her room. Arya does as she is told and goes to her room and Leland fallows, they get into her room and they look at each other and wonder why no one else could see him. Arya asks Leland what might of mad his mother just take off, her tell her everything he could remember before she left. As the two of them put the pieces of the story the realize there is something missing from his story, he remember that one min. he is out playing in the woods and the next thing he is sitting at the kitchen table and his mother is crying and she didn't notice him sitting there either.... TO BE CONTINUED
You did not grab the simple concept of writing. Please try again or something else.
Please don't continue.

Please.

Consider this me begging.
Maybe you should take up another hobby...
Might I suggest whittling?
neutral

That's all I have to say.

-Rasko
im srry if me liking to write and letting people see what i write offends you, or even if you dont like it. and if you not liking it is the case than don bother reading it!! thank you and have a nice day!! talk2hand
this is good, you just have to check your spelling sometimes.
anime_emogirl666
im srry if me liking to write and letting people see what i write offends you, or even if you dont like it. and if you not liking it is the case than don bother reading it!! thank you and have a nice day!! talk2hand


How can we tell we don't like it if we don't read it? rolleyes
anime_emogirl666
and if you not liking it is the case than don bother reading it!!

That doesn't even make sense. s**t, man, you have to read something to know if you like it or not.

EDIT: Beaten to it.
dah fuzzinator of dewm!'s avatar
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It looks like a long block of text. If you chop it up when there is a change of dialogue speaker, then it would be easier to read.
anime_emogirl666
im srry if me liking to write and letting people see what i write offends you, or even if you dont like it. and if you not liking it is the case than don bother reading it!! thank you and have a nice day!! talk2hand


So you're saying that we have no right to have an opinion on this because it is so great and wonderful and doesn't need any improvement and we have no idea what we're talking about?

Well, shame on me then.

-Rasko
anime_emogirl666
im srry if me liking to write and letting people see what i write offends you, or even if you dont like it. and if you not liking it is the case than don bother reading it!! thank you and have a nice day!! talk2hand


Stop being whiny. You posted it up, you should have expected butt-hurt, especially when you don't read the rules of the forum. cheese_whine

It was poorly written, was not spell checked, and was not formatted at all.

And yes, you need all three of these.
Seichiro Asahi
this is good, you just have to check your spelling sometimes.

thank you.. and i know i need to have like two other people read over it but this was something i just typed up!
anime_emogirl666
im srry if me liking to write and letting people see what i write offends you, or even if you dont like it. and if you not liking it is the case than don bother reading it!! thank you and have a nice day!! talk2hand


You fail to grasp the understanding of the English language and how to write correctly. Deflate the ego and listen to those who know more than you. Your writing is weak. It sucks. You have so many grammar problems but I bet a girl like you don't have time to fool around with fixing petty mistakes. Suck it up and fix this crap. You do want to be understood, right? If not, find another hobby to do.

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