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hii haha this is just somethng i wrote when i got bored and had an idea, i have not looked it over yet so sorry for any typos that u will definitely see!! i just want to know if the idea is ok and if i got it across well. i have more saved of this story but i still have some doubts about that half that want to fix and stuff so im just posting this half. let me know how you feel about it please?
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I trembled in the small white wrap I had been given to barely cover my bare body, the cold air enveloped me as I stood on the stage in the line of women and men- some even children. It was almost my turn to be presented, I never imagined that I'd end up in an auction despite how common they were. I thought I was safe, my family and I had run a popular bar and provided entertainment in the form of music and dance, we had become a big name and we were owned by a kind demon- Brutus, that promised not to allow anyone to abuse us as long as we made him his money. But one day, he came to me and told me he had sold me to an auctioneer. I was mortified.

This auction was one who's bidding crowd was made up of only nobles and the highest level of demon, I'd wondered to myself why in the world I had been chosen to be a part of such a prestigious auction. There was nothing that really stood out about me; I was very thin, with only a tad bit of muscle to show for my years of dancing. And like most humans, I had sun damaged skin and dark, sunken baggy eyes. My grandfather had often told me stories of how this world used to be like before, without these demons on the surface, when magic was still legal for humans to use and weren't killed for it. It had always sounded so wonderful despite the ongoing war they had with the demons at the time. At least it had been better than it was now, I'd do anything to be able to release my magic and use it freely without the fear of being killed.

My gaze curiously moved from the weeping woman currently being auctioned and down the line of people before me that awaited the same fate. My heart tugged in sympathy at the sight of the frightened children, it was sick how innocent children were dragged into such disgusting events. It was no wonder there were less and less of them everyday, not only have humans stopped desiring families, but demons that were especially sick seemed to get a kick out of torturing them the most. Demons disgusted me, they were sadistic and treated humans like garbage. They all had a gray tint to their skin that I hated and sharpened teeth meant for intimidation and consumption of human flesh.

I cringed as a large demon took firm hold of my arm and tugged me out of the line and to the front of the stage where the charismatic autioneer with bright red hair had already begun to present me. My legs were shaky from fear and I was positive the only thing keeping me from falling to the wooden floor was the demon dragging me.

"...height is 162.5 centimeters and weight is at 40.8 kilograms. Fifteen years of age, professional dancer, virgin," the auctioneer finished.

My stomach churned in disgust as he announced my virginity, thoughts plagued my mind of the terrible things the demon who bought me would do. I pleaded to whatever gods could hear me, that no one would purchase me. Though I knew that my hopes were in vain, everyone was always sold.

I did my best to hold back my tears as demons began to bid on me, I felt more like a nameless object than ever before. I'd been used to being treated like a thing rather than a human by demons for all my life, but it was always okay because it never got too bad and I had my family that always treated me as if I mattered. But at the moment, I was completely alone on this forsaken stage as my future was sold away.

After a few more minutes, there were two remaining bidders; an elder demon and a younger one whom I'd recognized. He had been at the bar before and had attempted to steal away my older sister when Brutus had refused to sell her to him. She was heavily bruised when we managed to get to her, and still had a few faint markings from the incident to this day.

I definately didn't want to go with that demon.

Not like the older demon looked any better.

I gulped as I watched the bid go on, my future was soon to be decided. My mind still could not accept the fact that this was happening, and I silently plotted to escape whatever chance I got. I watched as the bid went on, and suddenly the younger demon stopped. The elder had won me with 750 silver coins, that seemed to be how much my life was worth to these demon scum.

The two guards the elder had brought along with him walked over on stage and stood on either side of me.

"Walk, human," one of them ordered.

I obliged, but when I made a move it seemed as if my bones had turned to jelly, I would've fallen on my face if one of the guards hadn't steadied me. They ended up having to keep a grip on both my arms to help me walk properly down the stairs and off the stage, it made me feel pathetic and weak. As we passed the man that was now my owner, I could see the folds in his tired face, he looked at me from the corner of his eye and smiled. I shivered uncomfortably at that, and continued on with the guards until we were outside of the building.

We walked to a open horse carriage that was decked out in golden accents, the demon that sat in front had the reigns in his lap and appeared to be bored. There was a young human woman that sat in the back of the carriage, she smiled softly at me and patted the seat next to her. The guards helped me up on the carriage, my legs still felt a little wobbly. Once they left, the woman rubbed my back in an attempt to soothe me, the demon in front of us nodded at us, allowing us permission to speak.

"Don't worry young one, you're lucky you were bought by Master Augustine," the woman's smile broadened, "He usually purchases the younger ones so that they do not have to suffer from sadistic demons. All he makes us do is labor work, it's tough but it isn't harsh like most others would make humans do. I've been with him for ten years now and he hasn't laid a hand on me,"

I stared into her kind blue eyes in confusion. "Are you just trying to lie to me so that I don't try to run away?"

She shook her head gently and gazed at me with determination. "No. If you do not believe me, then wait until you spend some time with us. You'll see, I promise you,"

I still didn't believe her, but a small light that flickered on inside of me hoped that she was telling the truth. I rested my back against the soft cushion of the carriage seat, and intertwined my fingers on my lap. This would've been a good time to make a run for it if the damned demon driver hadn't been a foot in front of me with a spear in hand.

"My name is Alma, what's yours?"

I shifted awkwardly in my seat as I tried to adjust the very revealing wrap, I'd never really been good at conversaion. "Sybella,"

She looked down at my wrap.

"Ah, I remember how uncomfortable that thing was, sucks huh?" she chuckled, "No worries we'll get you some clothes when we get back. So, Sybella where were you before you ended up here?"

My face dropped slightly as I remembered my family and the bar, it wasn't perfect but we were better off than the majority of humans were. "I used to entertain demons at this bar with my family as a dancer,"

"Oh, I wish I knew how to dance," she leaned in closer, intrigued, "What did you dance?"

"I did belly dancing," I gave her a small smile as I remembered the fun times I had with my older sister when we danced for the crowd.

The soft fabric of our skirts turned in rythmn as we carefully danced across the stage and brought the music alive through our precise and fluid body movements. Our performances would bring whistles from the audience and often very crude commentary that we were used to. We didn't always perform together, though. There were nights that I danced exclusively and other nights that my sister had.

"Oh! Such a beautiful da-,"

I looked at Alma in confusion as she had stopped suddenly in the middle of her sentence. I followed her gaze and saw it was on a demon that had been approaching the carriage. He looked feirce, his stance was strong and proud and he carried an aura of authority. His crystal blue eyes met mine and he shot me a lopsided grin, I quickly lowered my gaze. Humans didn't speak in front of demons when they were directly facing them, nor did we look them in the eye at all costs, unless we were instructed to. Or if we wanted to die.

The driver demon that had sat in front of us immediately got off the carriage and stood tall in front of the blue eyed demon.

"Good evening, crown prince. How may I help you?"

My eyes widened as I stared down at my hands on my lap, I couldn't believe the crown prince was here. What was he doing out in the open all alone without any guards? Damn, if only I had a dagger right now I'd like to strike it through his wretched piece of crap heart.

"Give me that newly bought human," the crown prince ordered.

I tightened my intertwined fingers anxiously, what the hell did he want with me. A hand gently gripped my forearm , I looked up and saw Alma give me a reassuring smile. I returned it and felt my nerves ease up a bit.

"Uh sir, I'm afraid I can not do that without permission," I heard the guard clear his throat nervously, "But I'm sure if you take it up with-"

There was a slicing sound, a thick liquid suddenly splattered onto my skin and wrap. I gasped when I saw the black spots all over my white wrap and skin, Alma let out a terrified shriek beside me. I glanced down and saw the guard's decapitated body, I nearly vomited at the sight of it. I saw dead bodies every day on the streets, yet it doesn't make it any less digusting of a sight to bear.

"Come, now. If you do not come to me calmly I will also kill your friend," the crown prince walked up to the back of the carriage and reached his hand out to me, "I own you now, little miss,"

I looked over to Alma, her eyes were still frozen in horror on the decapitated body, her blood stained hand over her mouth. She stumbled off of the carriage and crouched down beside the demon's decapitated body, her legs gave out from underneath her and she collapsed to the ground. I watched her symphatecially, and stood from my seat without trembling, to my pleasant surprise, and took hold of his calloussed hand. He helped me off of the carriage and walked off without a word, I followed after him as I eyed the bloodied sword in his hand.

He brought up his sword as he walked and took a black and red rag out of his pocket to wipe off the blood, I vaguely wondered if that rag used to be white. Once he'd finished cleaning it, he then tucked it back into it's sheath around his waist. I shivered as a cold wind blew, it chilled my exposed skin and made me feel as if I'd been bathed in ice. I wished silently to myself that I could at least wear pants or something instead of being nearly naked in this thin and tiny peice of fabric. Which was now stained with demon blood...that realization made an unpleasant shiver run up my spine and suddenly I wanted nothing more than to take a long bath.

As the crown prince walked, several demons paused to bow to him, but he barely noticed. I don't think he even really cared. I glared at the back of his head as I thought of how he killed that demon without a second thought just because he was in his way, I bet he did that with everyone.

What a piece of s**t.

A peice of s**t that I was now stuck with and had to obey. My mind became littered with disturbing thoughts of the things that may happen to me under the hand of this demon.

I was so screwed.

My thoughts of the horrors that awaited me in the future were soon cut loose when a group of demons came up the crown prince. The gold embroidered symbol of the royal family on their uniform made me assume they were his guards.

"My prince! Where were you?" a chubby guard questioned him.

"Getting a pet like the king asked," he nodded back at me.

All of the guards eyes fell on me and suddenly I felt a little insecure, I kept my eyes focused straight ahead at the back of his head. But then he turned around to face me so I had to avert my eyes to my feet. I did my best to concentrate on the barefoot sandals my sister had given me before I had left, so that I could feel at least some sort of comfort under the scrutionizing gaze of the crown prince. She'd designed them for me with beautiful tiny yellow and pink flowers, the string went around the toe beside my big toe and wrapped up around my ankles several times. A small warmth flooded within my stomach at the sight of it, the reminder of my family.

"Get her back to the castle and clean her up for me. I want her ready when I return. She's my mistress,"

I had to hold back my urge to vomit yet again, I knew I'd end up having to endure whatever he wanted to do but I'd expected him to beat me or work me to death. Not make me his mistress. And to be honest, I think I'd greatly prefer those first two ideas more than having to share a bed with him.

Three guards wasted no time and surrounded me, two at my sides and one behind me.

"Please walk forward, mistress, we will escort you to the castle," I was a little taken back by the guard's politeness.

I wasn't all too sure if it was because all royal guards were nicer like this, or because I was his mistress. I shrugged it off and walked forward as instructed, the yellowed dirt of the road clung to the bottoms of my feet as I trudged toward the most beautiful closed carriage I'd ever seen. Unlike Noble Augustine's open carriage who only bore a few gold accents, this one had gold all over that sparkled in the light of the sun with some black accents. The pitch black horses stood calmly as they awaited for their driver to lead them, their red eyes blinked at me as I walked by. A guard opened up the carriage door, and the two guards beside me then suddenly gripped either of my arms and effortlessly lifted me on to the back of the carriage, I blinked stupidly, having not expected the assistance. Two guards entered the carriage with me and sat opposite of me, one of them even had the courtesy to place a medium sized wash cloth on my seat so I wouldn't dirty the seat's precious royal black satin. The third guard sat in the front beside the driver, and with a cackle of the driver's reins, we were off.

I stared out the small window of the carriage so I wouldn't have to make awkward extended eye contact with the guards in front of me. I gulped as I could feel their cold stares bore into my flesh and bones. I decided to distract myself by letting my situation sink in, at first the thought of it frightened me but slowly I came to accept it. It had only been a matter a time for me to be put into an auction, it had just been delayed due to my circumstances. I should be grateful for the time I'd managed to spend with freedom, there were many other humans who hadn't had the same luxury as me. Yet I couldn't help but still crave the return of the little freedom I'd had.

I've never heard about how the prince treats his slaves, as far as I knew he never had any personal slaves. But from the ferocious rumors I've heard of him and the actions I saw him pull a few moments ago, I can assume he won't be treating me to a warm bed. My body trembled as the painful, bloodied sight of my older sister flashed in my mind of when the demon had beat her. I shut my eyes tightly to erase the image from my thoughts.

"-the SMU examination will be done at the castle, I never have carry on tests with me,"

The other guard let out an icy laugh. "Who ever does?"

My eyes snapped open as the guard's conversation trailed into my thoughts but made no other sudden movements so it wouldn't seem suspicious.

s**t! I forgot about the SMUE's, of course they'd check if someone was a magical user before they were allowed into the royal castle. I had been so caught up in this entire situation that I'd completely forgotten about it. Usually guards perfered to conduct the examinations by beating the suspected human until they can't take it anymore so their magic releases on instinct to protect themselves. Whether or not they show actual signs of being a magic user, they continue to beat them. Though they usually make sure to kill magic users faster since they're more dangerous, while innoccent people are lucky if they make it out alive from the beating.

These guards must be showing the decency to conduct the legitimate test on me because of the fact that I belong to the crown prince, they weren't allowed to damage his property. The actual SMUE consists of some chemical being inserted into the blood stream, then if the suspect passes out, they're a confirmed magical user. If they're not, then nothing happens to them. Apparently from the rumors I've heard, the chemical was something that made the person's magic think their body was a threat and thus made them pass out.

There was no way I was going to pass the Suspected Magic User Examination, the poor crown prince would lose his first mistress after having only had her for a few hours. I pondered whether or not it would be a blessing for me to die early on rather than go through the suffering the crown prince would surely put me through.

The very idea of dying within the hour sent my heart racing, I clapsed my hands on my lap tightly and did my best to control my tears. It might be better for me to die, but I couldn't help my desire to live even if it meant I had to suffer. Despite having a small existence, I couldn't bear the thought of it being wiped off the face of the world like a smudge on glass. I'd have to find some sort of way to escape, but then if I escaped, where would I go? I wouldn't be able to go back home, I was supposed to have been sold away to the auction by Brutus. He definately wouldn't allow me back home or he might get in trouble with the royal court.

Wait.

The crown prince didn't buy me, Augustine did. Nor did the crown prince know my name or where I came from, so how would he possibly be able to track me down? All he knew about me was what I looked like, he didn't even know who had bought me. If he did manage to track me down by just my appearance, it would take awhile. If anybody was going to track me down, it would probably end up being Augustine since he would wonder where his slave went, he'd get to me faster than the crown prince would. The crown prince couldn't take his property, right? And when Augustine captured me, it wouldn't be so bad since Alma said he was different from the rest, right? Plus at least in the mean time before he captured me I could spend a little more time with my family.

I decided to ignore the faults in my idea, I had managed to convince myself enough to make a decision to run for it. It wasn't like I had much to lose either way, I'd like to die trying at least instead of from a stupid SMU exam.

Now the question was when and how.

I couldn't possibly escape right now, I was in a closed carriage with four guards on it, I'd have to be a moron to attempt it. Hopefully I'll have a chance at it once we step out of the carriage, I'll make sure to keep my eyes peeled for an opportunity.

There was the option of using my magic to create an opportunity, but my abilities were extremely weak.

The carriage halted and one of the guards got out and turned to me expectantly, the other one nodded at the opened door, signaling me to get out. I stood from my seat and went towards the door, the guard outside then picked me up and set me on the ground. The second guard followed after me and got out, then took out his sword and placed the cold blade against my neck. The two guards stayed at my side, and the third one from before took his place behind me.

I stared down at the blade with wide eyes, my scared reflection looked back at me. The guard that held the sword spoke.

"Manditory, you know, so you won't run away during the test," he chuckled, "You have no reason to do that, right?"

I didn't dare look up at him, his voice threatning and mocking.

"Walk,"

Devoted Friend

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Interesting story. I like the plot of the story, and I do believe that you got it across well. As you mentioned, there were a few typos and grammatical errors. However, the part that I like the most was when Sybella was thinking of running away and the demon guard pulled out a sword and placed it against her neck. When I read this, I was thinking, "This is definitely an, 'Oh, s***!' moment!" That's what I like when I read a good story. I like it when the plot has a few twists and turns that will keep me guessing and telling myself, "Wow, I didn't see that coming!" Very well written. Keep up the good work.

Normal Abductee

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Loved it! Very well written. heart

The characters and story line didn't really interest me because this isn't normally the kind of story I like. But your writing had me so intrigued.

I was never taken out of the story and was always wondering what would happen next. Those are key points to a perfect story and you executed them so well.


One thing I thought could be improved was the main character. Her personalty is kinda plain. Maybe give her a more quirky or unique style. 3nodding
Pink Gamer
DragonFang09

thanks very much for the feedback you guys!!! and i will take that into consideration to change her chara up a little so that it is interesting! thanks again
You have a recurring issue with misusing commas and dashes, so try looking up some grammar tips that focus on those during your next edit. This is a great grammar site, if you don't know of it already. Not really my kind of story but I must say that it's excellent for an early draft. Keep it up. smile

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