C+C My Rough Draft Narrative Essay

[Shae Enders]

[Admiral Von Radioactivity]

Sorry...but we don't do/assist with homework in this forum.

[Shae Enders]

Oh, ok well I didn't really mean it as a way to get help with my work I just wanted to know what people thought of it...

[Admiral Von Radioactivity]

Shae Enders

Oh, ok well I didn't really mean it as a way to get help with my work I just wanted to know what people thought of it...

Which is assisting with it....


Anything that someone says that results in a change in your writing is assisting with it.

Plus, how hard can writing a personal narrative be? I'm not the greatest at English, but I wrote one a few weeks ago....and unless your birthdate in your profile is fake, I am younger than you....

[Shae Enders]

Kalianna Ariel Salmalin

Shae Enders

Oh, ok well I didn't really mean it as a way to get help with my work I just wanted to know what people thought of it...

Which is assisting with it....


Anything that someone says that results in a change in your writing is assisting with it.

Plus, how hard can writing a personal narrative be? I'm not the greatest at English, but I wrote one a few weeks ago....and unless your birthdate in your profile is fake, I am younger than you....

Ok sorry I guess when people ask for opinions, such as "that was good" or "that was bad", in the writers forum no one will ever be able to answer them again. Because they wouldn't know if the writing they are talking about was being graded or not unless the writer said so in the first place...

[clarion]

Helping someone with what they've already written is NOT the same thing as doing someone's homework for them. xp

As far as the essay goes, it looks pretty good so far. Cutting it off where you do makes it feel unfinished though, so even if you're stopping there for dramatic effect, I think it still needs more of a conclusion. Watch your possessives--they need apostrophes.

[Shae Enders]

clarion

Helping someone with what they've already written is NOT the same thing as doing someone's homework for them. xp

As far as the essay goes, it looks pretty good so far. Cutting it off where you do makes it feel unfinished though, so even if you're stopping there for dramatic effect, I think it still needs more of a conclusion. Watch your possessives--they need apostrophes.

Thank you very much heart , for the comments and for not being mean like that other lady whee !