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The end

Here alone, standing barefoot in our lawn,
Worms squeezing their way through my toes
Tonight that's how it goes.
I'm at your window kneeling quiet,
I thought at least I'd maybe try to get your head right your heart right
"Let him go!"

Then through the glass I see your dress fall to the floor as he embraces every inch of you
The woman I adore.
I can't believe the way you're bending
Can't believe this neverending moaning asking him for more
Begging him for more

How far will I go to make it feel right?
"Come home"
I have to fix this on my own
Replace my heart,
Cause I'm convinced mine broke the day I let us end
Replace my heart,
I don't wanna live by coping, I'm done with hoping.....end

I creeped in close enough to see the way he touched her,
From her feet across her knees, inside her sweetest spot
He pleased and pleased her.
I turned around and tried to take control, but no control was capable
It was a centerfold of how less than low can possibly go.

I squeezed the life into my brain
Like pushing knives into a vein
I've gotta get, I said I've gotta get inside
So to the back window I crawl in silent
Standing in the darkness of my living room
This used to be my home

How far will I go to make it feel right?
"Come home"
I'm moving forward to the bedroom door
Replace my heart
Cause I'm convinced mine broke the day I let us end
Replace my heart
I don't wanna live by coping, I'm done with hoping...end

I turn the doorknob with two fingers to be slow enough to sneak into the room among the corner darkness gloom
I had to see this happening.
He pushed himself so deep inside her clapping rang and bounced off every wooden walled room
And that's when all went silent blank except for the color red
As I walked calmly numbing paralyzed beside the bed
I said "I know I'm not allowed to be here. I just had to see how good your new man really ******** you. Cause you both been ******** me."

"So now I planned the last thing you can both do as a pair
I tie both blindfolds tight around your ******** eyes to blind your stare
I don't want to alarm you, but I figured we could end this in what seems easy quick and painless
Man, so I'll get down to business
I choose you first, there's a gun, it's at your head
So laugh at me one more time but keep your face inside the bed
You sit and watch me while I do this s**t and learn from what I've said."
I cocked the pistol pulled the trigger, and all I saw was red

How far will I go to make it feel right?
"Come home"
I have to fix this on my own

Then the screaming oh the screaming
It's nice to see you scared
Of such a weak and stupid boyfriend
Who knows you never really cared
I'll leave you with a question that I need to hear from your head
Was all this worth it knowing you have just seconds left to live?

Now think about your answer, as you lay face down on the bed
I cocked the pistol pulled the trigger and all I saw was red
I gently stroke her arm as she lies lifeless on her back
Then placed the barrel in my mouth
All I saw was black.
Take my hand
Maybe we should run away
Maybe we should disappear
Leave everything behind
Like the useless things
Boxes labeled memories
The sudden health emergencies
Yeah we could leave those things behind

Show me, show me arms that reach for all we can be
Through understanding, I tried forgiveness,
I faced the past, it's what I witnessed

Why do I only feel the chills when I'm with you?
I only hear your words that you say are true
But you keep thinking it over, thinking it over,
You can catch me if you wanted to, oh

Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,

Now, why you gotta say goodbye
When you know you could've come with me
No, can't afford to leave and stay
You're gonna have to just build one way

So tell me, tell me all the things you told me we could be
Through understanding, I tried forgiveness,
I faced the facts, it's what I witnessed

Why do I only feel the chills when I'm with you
I only hear your words that you say are true
But you keep thinking it over, thinking it over,
You can catch me if you wanted to
I only feel the chills when I'm with you
I feel like I'm so high, I'm feeling so high
C-catch me, c-c-catch me

Why does a heart always have to break
(when you're trying way too hard), have to break
(yes she'll see right though you), have to break
Oh communication, yeah conversation,
It breaks down
Now there will be nothing to talk about,
(absolutely nothing, just blah blah blah)

Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,

Why do I only feel the chills when I'm with you
I only hear your words that you say are true
But you keep thinking it over, thinking it over,
You can catch me if you wanted to
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Whoa-ah-oh ah-ah-oh,
Can catch me, c-c-catch me
Oh.
A silver plated numbing gum
And Jesus resting on my thumb
A hard to reach malaria
I've got the mood that seems to scare ya.
I'm paranoid, self destroyed.
Believe me lord I'm sorry
I've got the mood that seems to bury ya
I've got the nightmare called...
Schizophrenia

I cry. I cry and I don't know why.
The fever becomes my home.
I cry. I cry and I don't know why.
The fever becomes my home.
Becomes my home.

I love it when you're holding me.
You have a gentle way of calming.
I haven't felt that way since 1993,
When my mother held me.
I bet you're waiting for a long sob story
OF how I was mistreated again.
No, I wasn't built that way.
I was strong but desperately brave,
And I didn't mean to scareya...
Schizophrenia.

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