Labeled shred.

[[.blank]]

I saw your face once in a photograph of a window, slightly crooked/head tilt captured, maybe you were emulating my question far in the past knowing one day I'd see you seeing me. You say I'm transparent, but I see more of you from my own eyes. Somewhere there is a contortion of your beauty that disgraces every surface reflecting, and when I look out from this place, I see coincidence in every well-arranged atom, empty spaces stretching billions of years beyond my eyes, to yours, always meeting my gaze, and you follow like you know know every step through this scattered mess. Here is where I know we are best friends. We stared at maps and traced where we'd been and announced where we would one day see but we could never seem to hold on to the second where we were, back though the infinite space to each coincidental mostly empty atom; to sit and speak to one another, brilliantly. You said "do you ever look at the stars and comprehend how tiny we are" and I replied by smiling.


Some nights I just sit here and shake
soul reaching for the point
of this? You'll feel better if you
when you
how do you even do
anything at all these days.
They're just pale and even


Weird face matching name
but it suits you like that wedding coat, I am drawn
on you like a stick figure with all the intention
and lack of skill
a three year old could muster.
Awkward and laughter that just rings
louder and constant
repeat and blurring me out


I am Jupiter on the train, swollen sparking
so far from this place
I am a crop bent intricate.

[sora wonk]

The ideas in this poem are really great, really complicated and very beautiful. I think what threw me off most was the structure of the first stanza as opposed to the rest. Maybe if you separated them somehow, the poem would be a bit easier to get into. I think just the way people process things, they need a short, snappy first line many times.

I also think your writing would be better showcased on tumblr or a blog or something. I think it's a bit squandered on gaia, except for looking for feedback.

This is really good. I liked it.

[Power Armor Felix]

You voice here reminds me of pebbles and gravels for some reason; I've never noticed it before but perhaps your style deals in microcosms? These events, though well-organized, roll most tiny across the fingers.

[Skwerli]

Power Armor Felix

...

There's a face I didn't think I'd see. How's the face, face?

[Power Armor Felix]

Skwerli

Power Armor Felix

...

There's a face I didn't think I'd see. How's the face, face?

question *Momentarily takes off his face and views it from the outside*

I remember you too from somewhere, but which where was it...

[Skwerli]

Power Armor Felix

Skwerli

Power Armor Felix

...

There's a face I didn't think I'd see. How's the face, face?

question *Momentarily takes off his face and views it from the outside*

I remember you too from somewhere, but which where was it...

Around here, but I think that was back in 2011 last I was on. I had a psychological break and took a breather for a while.

[Power Armor Felix]

Skwerli

Power Armor Felix

Skwerli

Power Armor Felix

...

There's a face I didn't think I'd see. How's the face, face?

question *Momentarily takes off his face and views it from the outside*

I remember you too from somewhere, but which where was it...

Around here, but I think that was back in 2011 last I was on. I had a psychological break and took a breather for a while.

That's alright, I'm really trying to remember though if we encountered before or after the psychotic break happened. I seem to recall that you were a chatty one made of grape kool-aid & sugar as your theme? Gods, I've hit on so many female users that I can't even remember the legacy of misdeeds burning_eyes

[[.blank]]

Hehe. These were written as 4 separate things, the first just being some note scribble and the rest slightly more edited poems. I was just frantically posting them as I thought the notes from my iPhone were gone forever. Copy, paste, sigh of relief they were at the very least saved where they couldn't be removed easily and abandoned like the runt kitten.

Poor kitten.

I appreciate the comments, though.

[[.blank]]

body at 103 and still freezing
"are you sleeping?"
no, eyes just closed and slumped

then your arm around me
your hand playing with my hair
and grazing mine
"are still you sleeping?"

We lay here like this until Archer is over
and in the quiet after
"a little warmth wouldn't kill you" tolling through my sick mind
submerging me in heat and salt but erasing nothing.

I leave you on the couch
and cry in my bed.

[2pound]

[.blank]

....you follow like you know know every step through....we were, back though the infinite space to....

how do you make some beautiful prose-like paragraph poem and then follow up with some strange syntax poetry that just..... works? i'm lost in this poem and am loving it. it's like discovering there's a sky below the sky you know and it's right in front of you which makes me question whether those red, bolded words were errors made on purpose (repeating 'know' and mispelling 'through').

good stuff.

[[.blank]]

2pound: thank you for your kind words and keen eyes. Guess I ought to read through my junk (to the end) at least once! I just get so distracted.