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Shadow_Spark

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Post: 4666442_1 created on Tue, 23 Nov 2004 23:21:45 +0000
Posted: Tue, 23 Nov 2004 23:21:45 +0000

I sit here with this broken blade
Wondering if my whole life was in vain
For everything I have worked for
It all fell away with this war
I hoped to be remembered
Now I hope to be forgotten
Why didn't anyone tell me that I was wrong
Before I killed our people's savior
Took away the one chance of freedom
The only hope for salvation
I've been condemned for what I've done
But trust me I wasn't the only one
The ones who made this young child learn to kill
The ones who broke and twisted my will
Why am I the only one left to die
Without even the sight of my own eyes
They took away everything I loved
Both the ones I trusted
And the ones I thought were in the wrong
Maybe one day I will be free
And will be able to just be me
But for now I'm just a broken soul
One with a blood stained past
A puppet that has been tossed away
Once they cut the strings

Please tell me what you think of my poem...

Army_Girl

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Post: 4666442_2 created on Tue, 23 Nov 2004 23:33:31 +0000
Posted: Tue, 23 Nov 2004 23:33:31 +0000

AWSOME!!!!!!!!! I love it!!! Email it to me please. blaugh

Shadow_Spark

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Post: 4666442_3 created on Tue, 23 Nov 2004 23:41:37 +0000
Posted: Tue, 23 Nov 2004 23:41:37 +0000

I guess I could e-mail it to you... but what ever for?

Shadow_Spark

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Post: 4666442_4 created on Wed, 24 Nov 2004 00:13:06 +0000
Posted: Wed, 24 Nov 2004 00:13:06 +0000

All you people out there... Please comment on my poem...

SilverEdgedNight

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Post: 4666442_5 created on Wed, 24 Nov 2004 00:32:45 +0000
Posted: Wed, 24 Nov 2004 00:32:45 +0000

i think its really good, i like it

Amil

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Post: 4666442_6 created on Wed, 24 Nov 2004 00:53:22 +0000
Posted: Wed, 24 Nov 2004 00:53:22 +0000

this is really good...it's kinda sad and i got lost as to what is was about, but i got back on track i think...anyway i liked it. good job!

Emotionless_Disaster

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Post: 4666442_7 created on Wed, 24 Nov 2004 01:57:45 +0000
Posted: Wed, 24 Nov 2004 01:57:45 +0000

This is a really good poem. It can be taken in so many ways. Alot of poems I read about things like this are done badly unlike yours. Keep up the good work.