Sinister Obsession
Azure Cinder
I used to think that nightmares only happened in your sleep.
I was blind to the truth of the world.
I was blind to the pain, and the misery, and the sorrow.
And then one day, I lost my sister.
And suddenly, I could see.
Nice! I could see this as being like a blurb on the inside cover/back of a book. I'd be interested to hear what other plot you might have developed revolving around this same theme.
Your repetition of "I was blind" kinda grated on my nerves a little. I think if you revised it to something like "I was blind to the truth of the world;/The pain... the misery... and the sorrow..." it would be better. Ellipses optional, I just thought drawing those parts out a little bit made it feel a bit more emotional/dramatic. Otherwise, this is quite good! Keep at it!
Thanks! so a little more like this?
I used to think that nightmares only happened in your sleep.
I was blind to the truth of the world.
The pain, misery, and sorrow.
And then one day, I lost my sister.
And suddenly, I could see.