Would you complain if your GF/BF wasn't ready for sex?

[Salty_Potato]

Havent been before, dont see why Id start in the future.

[Desideraht]

Depends on how long it took, and whether or not they tell me why they aren't ready.

Like my partner actually wanted sex before we had it. Like he wanted to have sex like 2 weeks after we met, and I wasn't ready. I was dealing with heartache from my ex and still feeling like I didn't know him quite well enough. He was very patient and took small steps. He helped nudge me gently into kissing him, cuddling with him, and then we eventually started making out. When I felt ready for sex, I took his virginity. We'd known each other for 28 days. >.> Seriously though, I've been with him for a year and a half so I don't regret it.

Now I would want to understand WHY my partner wasn't ready. I explained to him why I wasn't, and that helped him accept it. If my partner won't tell me WHY, that would upset me a lot, and I wouldn't really trust them after that. It could lead to a break up if they refused to open up to me. It would also start to wear on me if it took months and months, even if they gave me a reason. I would want to see progress, and see them work towards it, because I highly value sex as a part of expressing intimacy.

[Eisefin]

My husband was a virgin when we got together. He was nervous and felt it necessary to wait to see where our relationship was going before exposing himself so vulnerably. I understood and felt no aggravation for having to wait. As our relationship progressed, we had conversations about sex and how he would feel most comfortable (I always waited for him to bring it up). I am glad we waited. It felt special when we did finally have sex.

I was actually prepared to wait and I could have been comfortable not having penetration sex ever. He would want to satisfy my needs without me mentioning anything and give me oral. I would return the favor. The intimacy and closeness was good enough for me. (:

[Pandora Paradox]

I could wait at least a year, possibly a good deal more than that depending on the person. But I would not be in a relationship with an asexual/no prospects of sexual activity, or if they wanted to wait until marriage but didn't plan to get married for, say, 5-10 years. Also, they'd have to be okay with me masturbating, using toys, whatever... I am NOT willing to go without an orgasm for months or years on end.

[r33na1]

i'd respect it.

[embassynight]

No, if I love him/her, I'd respect that decision.

[The Gay Science]

If someone was going to require an extended period before having sex, I would probably break up with them. It's not even that I need sex that immediately. I just don't really want to date someone with completely different views on sex and morality. If they had some sort of trauma that kept them from having sex, like having been sexually assaulted, then it would be a different situation. I could be supportive of that.

[Stale Humor]

I wouldn't be in such a relationship in the first place.

[MiameMiame]

Hell yes I would complain. If someone isn't sexually compatible or religious then I wouldn't date them in the first place.

[Sir Deranged Reindeer]

I was having sex with my current boyfriend before we were dating so... lol. I haven't minded waiting in the past, assuming you're talking about people giving up their virginity.

/If you're also including they just don't feel like having sex, right now, I don't mind that either. ...If someone says no, and you do it anyway, that counts as rape and uh... That's bad. neutral Respect other people's boundaries.

That said, I've been living with my boyfriend for a few years, and we've been dating longer, so we're like an old married couple. :'D

[Pepper Prince]

no.

[Ven Loraine]

I would be annoyed after some weeks.

At my age (22) you are either "ready" for sex 24/7 or you have some serious mental problems.

[breast massage specialist]

PumpkinSpiced

BABYZ SQUISHY

you can respect the decision and complain about it at the same time.

No you can't. You can respect the decision and decide to break up over it if it's a dealbreaker for you. But if you're choosing to stay with someone who you know isn't ready to have sex, then trying to pressure the person into it or make the person feel bad about it is not respectful.

yes you could. complaining =/= pressuring

[Grin Evilly]

I went through that with my boyfriend, he wanted to wait. Sure, it sucked. But if you like/love that person you'll respect their decision.

[X sansmerci]

I'd respect their decision, but I probably wouldn't date anyone whose choice to abstain for the moment was based in mush about sex being immoral or wanting to wait until marriage.

Ven Loraine

I would be annoyed after some weeks.

At my age (22) you are either "ready" for sex 24/7 or you have some serious mental problems.

Speak for yourself, but expecting that of others is neither socially kosher nor based in reality. Most people do not want sex every moment of every day.