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Remy is back again....

Please don't kill me. D: 0.13714804722979 13.7% [ 151 ]
I'll be nice, I promise. 0.23342415985468 23.3% [ 257 ]
I'm back for now, we're all good right? 0.14532243415077 14.5% [ 160 ]
Wait... What are you doing with that knife? 0.48410535876476 48.4% [ 533 ]
Total Votes:[ 1101 ]
Hi all :3 I am here for a different purpose today. Meet my "little brother" (person I'm mentoring). He wanted to post here, but he got nervous XD be gentle with him. He has a question. He may even post here more if you're nice~


OffTheChainInsane
Um, okay, so my name is Seth and I'm fourteen but don't remember that because I'll be fifteen on the fifteenth of this month. I'm FtM, but I can't even start passing yet because my mom won't let me. The councelors think she's in denial or something, I don't know. But that's also not important. The reason I'm posting is I have a question. My girlfriend keeps calling me gay, a lesbian, a dyke, a butch, etc. Any time I try to explain to her that I'm not, she goes apesh_t on me. I've even told her that I'm trans and she keeps doing it. I already have severe depression from... well... not being a boy... and she just makes it worse. I love her though. What do I do?!
Bornes
User ImageSo I'm back from my psychologist appointment and I now hold in my hand a letter comprised of one sentence. This single sentence letter will change the gender marker on my NY State driver's license.

I also got the referral to endocrinology so I should be making an appointment with them very soon to begin my HRT.

Trying very hard to convince myself not to get too excited, here.
I cannot believe I ever questioned my psychologist. One meeting and all this stuff happened. I think I love her...

EDIT:
She couldn't write the letter needed to change my birth certificate BUT COINCIDENTALLY I have an appointment tomorrow with someone who I'm pretty sure can. whee
Who is this psychologist o.o???

Congratulations!!! How wonderful! So glad things are finally going well : D!! ::hugs::
Bornes's avatar

Aged Phantom

OffTheChainInsane
Um, okay, so my name is Seth and I'm fourteen but don't remember that because I'll be fifteen on the fifteenth of this month. I'm FtM, but I can't even start passing yet because my mom won't let me. The councelors think she's in denial or something, I don't know. But that's also not important. The reason I'm posting is I have a question. My girlfriend keeps calling me gay, a lesbian, a dyke, a butch, etc. Any time I try to explain to her that I'm not, she goes apesh_t on me. I've even told her that I'm trans and she keeps doing it. I already have severe depression from... well... not being a boy... and she just makes it worse. I love her though. What do I do?!
User Image
You break up with her because she's an a*****e.
You love her? Too bad. Get over it. She obviously doesn't support you and if you're getting that depressed over it and she knows this is making you emo and she keeps doing it anyway, she's abusing you. You are in an abusive relationship now-- congratulations!

You probably think if you break up with her nobody will love you again because you're not a boy or that you are unlovable. This IS NOT true. This girl clearly does not love you for who you are, because who you are is A BOY.
Get away from this girl as fast as you can. She does not support you and is only taking advantage of you and/or using you.

@MarigoldMari
She's in Albany, but she's in the VA system. She also is not a gender therapist, just a normal psychologist, so I don't think you could get in touch with her. Sorry. =(
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Flickering Hope
VoidCrow
Hello everyone. I'm not sure if this thread is active at all, but I was just popping in to say hello. You may call me Void, because I don't really like people know too much about me. I see gender in a very wobbly way, and I might discuss it/my own further later. I'm not sure if I'll be sticking around too much, but I do plan on giving it a test run.

How are you all this evening, morning, today?

Hello Void, welcome to the thread. You can call me Trisha. This thread tends to remain fairly active. If you don't want to stick around then that's alright but you're welcome here anytime. If you have any questions or anything you wish to discuss then we're all here to listen.
Well I was just feeling awful today, so I thought I might discuss it with someone. But I talked to an internet buddy and now I feel average again. o ~ o
Bornes

@MarigoldMari
She's in Albany, but she's in the VA system. She also is not a gender therapist, just a normal psychologist, so I don't think you could get in touch with her. Sorry. =(
I'm glad you were able to be blessed with such an amazing psychologist, though :3 may you be blessed with further good luck! I'll find somebody some day XD
Bornes's avatar

Aged Phantom

MarigoldMari
Bornes

@MarigoldMari
She's in Albany, but she's in the VA system. She also is not a gender therapist, just a normal psychologist, so I don't think you could get in touch with her. Sorry. =(
I'm glad you were able to be blessed with such an amazing psychologist, though :3 may you be blessed with further good luck! I'll find somebody some day XD
User ImageWell, not all is good in Q land. I also had an ortho-surgeon consult today and some stuff from unemployment came in, and let's just say both sides of that fence I'd rather like to run far, far away from.
Bornes
User ImageWell, not all is good in Q land. I also had an ortho-surgeon consult today and some stuff from unemployment came in, and let's just say both sides of that fence I'd rather like to run far, far away from.

Sounds awfully stressful and not good D: but it also sounds like quite a lot is happening and changing, though not always for the better. At least things aren't standing still?
Bornes's avatar

Aged Phantom

MarigoldMari

Sounds awfully stressful and not good D: but it also sounds like quite a lot is happening and changing, though not always for the better. At least things aren't standing still?
User ImageTrue. I guess I just dislike it when NOTHING happens for like a month and then EVERYTHING happens at the same time. =(
Bornes
User ImageTrue. I guess I just dislike it when NOTHING happens for like a month and then EVERYTHING happens at the same time. =(
): Just make sure to rest when you can to minimize the stress from that. I'm sure when its over, you'll be a lot happier.
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VoidCrow
Flickering Hope
VoidCrow
Hello everyone. I'm not sure if this thread is active at all, but I was just popping in to say hello. You may call me Void, because I don't really like people know too much about me. I see gender in a very wobbly way, and I might discuss it/my own further later. I'm not sure if I'll be sticking around too much, but I do plan on giving it a test run.

How are you all this evening, morning, today?

Hello Void, welcome to the thread. You can call me Trisha. This thread tends to remain fairly active. If you don't want to stick around then that's alright but you're welcome here anytime. If you have any questions or anything you wish to discuss then we're all here to listen.
Well I was just feeling awful today, so I thought I might discuss it with someone. But I talked to an internet buddy and now I feel average again. o ~ o

I'm glad you're feeling better than you were. Having someone that you can talk to is always a good thing. It's really a bad feeling when you really need someone to talk to but don't know anyone that you can talk to. Sometimes I feel really alone and feel like that. It's really great to have people you can talk to.
Desideraht's avatar

Dapper Phantom

So when I style my hair more "conventional," people think I'm younger. I had my hair combed back in a more sophisticated way and people thought I was a lot younger today. Duly noted, lol. But I still passed as male.

Going to yoga at the LGBT center tomorrow morning. I guess I'll work out at the beach after that. Hoping to go to the weekly support meeting as well. Asked a coworker if he could cover me and he said he could if I asked everyone else and they said no. So basically that's what happened and I don't have his number so I had to message him on FB, lol. We've never had contact online so I hope he gets it... Want to friend him but not sure if I should friend coworkers. IDK, he's really chill. Plus I'm leaving this job in a couple months anyway.

The weekly support groups have really helped. I mean tremendously. And they kind of force me to hold myself accountable, keep track, and face my fears. It's really nice. You know people who have fully transitioned and s**t, they have it all squared off, and they can just live as "normal" men if they want, but I am far from that. So as much as I feel confident in my identity, I still need support because of how I look and s**t. I like to pretend like it doesn't bother me when people say I'm young/feminine, but it does. That being said, I also felt very hit on by some girls yesterday, and was getting a lot of "looks" if you get what I mean. I mean like I was getting checked out. It was refreshing.
Desideraht's avatar

Dapper Phantom

This is out of the blue but... I kind of want to try casual sex, without strings attached. No deep emotional connection or relationship. Just two (or more) people having fun. Where I'm not jealous of anybody because we're practically strangers. But I know that's like, impossible when you're trans, unless you search within a tightly knit lgbt social circle. Not to mention I don't think people in groups like that are willing to all go get tested before intimacy. Basically I'm just like "woe is me" because it can't be as easy as I'd like it to be. Sigh.

It's just when I mix sex with relationships, I regret it. I end up having all these emotional issues tied in with it. I kind of just want to enjoy it without all the baggage. Is that even possible? I don't even mind the idea of being objectified as a "tranny". I'm sure whoever I'd be with would be getting equal objectification from me.

I miss passionately making out without feeling guilty about it. Sex without expectations or restrictions. I miss intimacy where it was just wild and lustful and completely natural. I just don't get that anymore with my partner who I am really confused about what "status" we are in. I feel like I dumped him, but did I? He's one of those people you can't really get rid of. And part of me doesn't want to. But I know it's just about the sex at this point. It's like I'm setting him aside just in case I get desperate. I feel really bad. But I've at least told him as much. He is aware of that portion, though I don't think he knows I want to sleep around (oh well, he'll find out). My desire is far from what I'll get. I don't think I'll trust someone that much again. I'll just assume they have AIDS or something or that they'll get me pregnant (if they're male).

This all seems so out of nowhere but I feel like it's been building up inside for a long time.
I'm basically very confused at the moment.

I keep wanting to write about how I feel but I just keep stopping half way through and deleting it all. I'm surprised I got this much out. Dealing with some dysphoria, too, just wanting to have my surgery and start the life I really want... but money. ******** money.
You break up with her because she's an a*****e.
You love her? Too bad. Get over it. She obviously doesn't support you and if you're getting that depressed over it and she knows this is making you emo and she keeps doing it anyway, she's abusing you. You are in an abusive relationship now-- congratulations!

You probably think if you break up with her nobody will love you again because you're not a boy or that you are unlovable. This IS NOT true. This girl clearly does not love you for who you are, because who you are is A BOY.
Get away from this girl as fast as you can. She does not support you and is only taking advantage of you and/or using you.


But I love her, and she says she loves me...
OffTheChainInsane
You break up with her because she's an a*****e.
You love her? Too bad. Get over it. She obviously doesn't support you and if you're getting that depressed over it and she knows this is making you emo and she keeps doing it anyway, she's abusing you. You are in an abusive relationship now-- congratulations!

You probably think if you break up with her nobody will love you again because you're not a boy or that you are unlovable. This IS NOT true. This girl clearly does not love you for who you are, because who you are is A BOY.
Get away from this girl as fast as you can. She does not support you and is only taking advantage of you and/or using you.

But I love her, and she says she loves me...
But you have to weigh the pros and the cons. ::hugs:: hello o:
Bornes's avatar

Aged Phantom

OffTheChainInsane

But I love her, and she says she loves me...
User ImageShe doesn't love you.
Why would someone who loves you constantly insult you?
Why would they call you names?
Why would they insist you are something that you are not?
Why would they say that you are wrong about who YOU are, when YOU'RE the one explaining it to them (Only you know yourself)?
Why would someone who loves you NOT want to make you happy?

You're a teenager, you don't need to be in a relationship to begin with. Love is a feeling, and it is not fair. Dump her fast or stay in a relationship that will just make you depressed.
If you like being depressed, fine, do that. Your choice.

We can't help you if you don't want to help yourself.

@Thread
So the person I saw today couldn't write me the letter to change my birth cert sex either, but she said she knew someone who could and would talk to him and get back to me.
Also, definitely got an endo referral now. I'm just waiting on an appointment. 3nodding

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