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TheValenDreth
Mega Lya
If you do end up self-harming, that means you've killed the butterfly. But, you can always start again and redraw the butterfly and name it the same as you did before or something else.


Then what's the f*cking point? That's like a game which was made so the player has no way to lose. Might as well draw the butterfly already cut in half.
The point of the butterfly project is defeating self-harm. You are not supposed to self harm, but winning or losing is not the theme of the game. The theme of the game is to not self-harm, and for many, the butterfly project helps them stop.


Whenever one of these cowards fail and DO cut they can just start over by drawing yet another butt-ugly insect. There's no real consequence to failing.

This makes the whole program as useful as plucking hair from a whale.
ectogasm's avatar

Warlord

Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm

I thought there was another thread like this?

There used to be a thread in here but I believe it's died out. I also got tired of waiting for this thread that was in the testing forum to move so there is also one in the extended discussion that I created after waiting impatiently for an afternoon XD So yeah, you might have seen one.

Yeah, I would have noticed it.
I might contribute to this thread since I'm still struggling with this.
I'm sorry you struggle with it also. How long have you dealt with it, if I may ask?

I first started at the end of January.
It's been on and off.
It's all about weeding out the bad ones sweatdrop
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm

I thought there was another thread like this?

There used to be a thread in here but I believe it's died out. I also got tired of waiting for this thread that was in the testing forum to move so there is also one in the extended discussion that I created after waiting impatiently for an afternoon XD So yeah, you might have seen one.

Yeah, I would have noticed it.
I might contribute to this thread since I'm still struggling with this.
I'm sorry you struggle with it also. How long have you dealt with it, if I may ask?

I first started at the end of January.
It's been on and off.
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.
ectogasm's avatar

Warlord

Mega Lya
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.

I've gotten support from close friends and that's about it. No help yet.
My family is aware of it though, I just don't think they're concerned enough.
ectogasm
Mega Lya
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.

I've gotten support from close friends and that's about it. No help yet.
My family is aware of it though, I just don't think they're concerned enough.
Why wouldn't they be concerned??

That's good you have a few friends to support you. I would recommend counseling. I was HIGHLY against this at first--but I found a counselor I love. We don't talk about counseling-type-things all the time either. Such as, today she showed me two pictures of her baby son. (He's adorable, btw)
K-Nesss's avatar

Rainbow Fatcat

Mega Lya
It's all about weeding out the bad ones sweatdrop

They will get bored if you don't reply.
K-Nesss
Mega Lya
It's all about weeding out the bad ones sweatdrop

They will get bored if you don't reply.
Yeah. I blocked the first two "bad ones" so far. But I guess I will stick to not replying, lol.
ectogasm's avatar

Warlord

Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.

I've gotten support from close friends and that's about it. No help yet.
My family is aware of it though, I just don't think they're concerned enough.
Why wouldn't they be concerned??

That's good you have a few friends to support you. I would recommend counseling. I was HIGHLY against this at first--but I found a counselor I love. We don't talk about counseling-type-things all the time either. Such as, today she showed me two pictures of her baby son. (He's adorable, btw)

Oh, I'm sure they are but they haven't proven to me that they are.
They'll ask me what's up, I don't give the information they want, they drop it.
I guess it's because they know I won't accept any help at this point and I guess it's because I said "I stopped." but it got bad and I still think about it and rarely I'll do it, first summer with this struggle.
I haven't found any counsellors yet or therapists in my area.
I can see myself being against it.
How is the counselling all in all?
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.

I've gotten support from close friends and that's about it. No help yet.
My family is aware of it though, I just don't think they're concerned enough.
Why wouldn't they be concerned??

That's good you have a few friends to support you. I would recommend counseling. I was HIGHLY against this at first--but I found a counselor I love. We don't talk about counseling-type-things all the time either. Such as, today she showed me two pictures of her baby son. (He's adorable, btw)

Oh, I'm sure they are but they haven't proven to me that they are.
They'll ask me what's up, I don't give the information they want, they drop it.
I guess it's because they know I won't accept any help at this point and I guess it's because I said "I stopped." but it got bad and I still think about it and rarely I'll do it, first summer with this struggle.
I haven't found any counsellors yet or therapists in my area.
I can see myself being against it.
How is the counselling all in all?
Sorry for the delay in responding,
It's good that you rarely do it--but you just started, hon. I thought it would be a rare thing for me too.... I'm getting better, but for a while I did it every day. More than one time.

Well, my first counselor I hated. I thought she was judging me for my self-harm. I asked if I could be switched and then I was switched to another counselor that I liked and was very upset when I found out she was moving, but it turned out it was for the better, and my counselor I've had for about 8 months now is my favorite counselor. I love her a lot. She's helped me so much and we set goals, and sometimes she "rewards" me, or tries to, if I do really good. Like, she brought me a piece of cheesecake, and we had days we didn't talk about anything and stuff, and she offered to go with me to Coas or a dollar store to chill during our appointment time instead. smile

I found it really helpful--but if you're not ready for it, you're not. You truly have to be ready for counseling to gain any insight or help through counseling--but I think once you're able to, it will help you dramatically.
2ndAndSebring's avatar

Hunter

Hey there- my name is Meredith, and I'm happy to say I haven't self-harmed in a year.

I think getting over it isn't so much of finding a distraction or doing the butterfly thing, but finding something you love. A distraction can either make you think about it or you'll eventually find yourself bored and willing to hurt yourself again; if there is something you love you'd want to get better at it, and that's a better distraction than stuff like watching TV. I started hurting myself (cutting, burning, etc.) because I was constantly told how I'm stupid and would never amount to anything; worrying about that and then having added stress because I wasn't able to focus in school, I couldn't handle it all and started cutting. But then I found something I was good at, which would be music and art, and I decided I'd rather spend my life doing something I love and living to see things get better than risk myself dying when things are still bad.

I was right, things got better for me. Sometimes you don't need a counselor, you just need to find something to want to wake up every morning for, a dream you can't accomplish if you don't stop harming.

Also, another website you can add to your list: www.twloha.com <- To Write Love On Her Arms
ectogasm's avatar

Warlord

Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.

I've gotten support from close friends and that's about it. No help yet.
My family is aware of it though, I just don't think they're concerned enough.
Why wouldn't they be concerned??

That's good you have a few friends to support you. I would recommend counseling. I was HIGHLY against this at first--but I found a counselor I love. We don't talk about counseling-type-things all the time either. Such as, today she showed me two pictures of her baby son. (He's adorable, btw)

Oh, I'm sure they are but they haven't proven to me that they are.
They'll ask me what's up, I don't give the information they want, they drop it.
I guess it's because they know I won't accept any help at this point and I guess it's because I said "I stopped." but it got bad and I still think about it and rarely I'll do it, first summer with this struggle.
I haven't found any counsellors yet or therapists in my area.
I can see myself being against it.
How is the counselling all in all?
Sorry for the delay in responding,
It's good that you rarely do it--but you just started, hon. I thought it would be a rare thing for me too.... I'm getting better, but for a while I did it every day. More than one time.

Well, my first counselor I hated. I thought she was judging me for my self-harm. I asked if I could be switched and then I was switched to another counselor that I liked and was very upset when I found out she was moving, but it turned out it was for the better, and my counselor I've had for about 8 months now is my favorite counselor. I love her a lot. She's helped me so much and we set goals, and sometimes she "rewards" me, or tries to, if I do really good. Like, she brought me a piece of cheesecake, and we had days we didn't talk about anything and stuff, and she offered to go with me to Coas or a dollar store to chill during our appointment time instead. smile

I found it really helpful--but if you're not ready for it, you're not. You truly have to be ready for counseling to gain any insight or help through counseling--but I think once you're able to, it will help you dramatically.

I'll be replying at different times too, my apologies in advance.
I'm not going to praise the fact that I rarely do it, it's a step. I regret starting but it's a coping mechanism.
I was like that too, multiple times.

I hear people say they're counsellors were bad, they weren't helpful and they disliked them and that can be discouraging for most people but I know that shouldn't stop me.
Even yourself you had to through the bad ones to get to one that you love.
When I'm ready, I believe that will help more. Being forced into something like this might make things worse. I want to be ready but it's not something you choose to be ready about, imo, it just happens.
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
ectogasm
Mega Lya
Oh wow. Are you getting help for what you're dealing with? It's good it's not constant, but it's probably a good idea to get some support with what you're going through.

I've gotten support from close friends and that's about it. No help yet.
My family is aware of it though, I just don't think they're concerned enough.
Why wouldn't they be concerned??

That's good you have a few friends to support you. I would recommend counseling. I was HIGHLY against this at first--but I found a counselor I love. We don't talk about counseling-type-things all the time either. Such as, today she showed me two pictures of her baby son. (He's adorable, btw)

Oh, I'm sure they are but they haven't proven to me that they are.
They'll ask me what's up, I don't give the information they want, they drop it.
I guess it's because they know I won't accept any help at this point and I guess it's because I said "I stopped." but it got bad and I still think about it and rarely I'll do it, first summer with this struggle.
I haven't found any counsellors yet or therapists in my area.
I can see myself being against it.
How is the counselling all in all?
Sorry for the delay in responding,
It's good that you rarely do it--but you just started, hon. I thought it would be a rare thing for me too.... I'm getting better, but for a while I did it every day. More than one time.

Well, my first counselor I hated. I thought she was judging me for my self-harm. I asked if I could be switched and then I was switched to another counselor that I liked and was very upset when I found out she was moving, but it turned out it was for the better, and my counselor I've had for about 8 months now is my favorite counselor. I love her a lot. She's helped me so much and we set goals, and sometimes she "rewards" me, or tries to, if I do really good. Like, she brought me a piece of cheesecake, and we had days we didn't talk about anything and stuff, and she offered to go with me to Coas or a dollar store to chill during our appointment time instead. smile

I found it really helpful--but if you're not ready for it, you're not. You truly have to be ready for counseling to gain any insight or help through counseling--but I think once you're able to, it will help you dramatically.

I'll be replying at different times too, my apologies in advance.
I'm not going to praise the fact that I rarely do it, it's a step. I regret starting but it's a coping mechanism.
I was like that too, multiple times.

I hear people say they're counsellors were bad, they weren't helpful and they disliked them and that can be discouraging for most people but I know that shouldn't stop me.
Even yourself you had to through the bad ones to get to one that you love.
When I'm ready, I believe that will help more. Being forced into something like this might make things worse. I want to be ready but it's not something you choose to be ready about, imo, it just happens.
100% agree.
When I was younger my parents forced me into counseling and I reluctantly went until I told my counselor I hated her and I wasn't coming back. You have to truly be ready for it and if you're not ready, it does no good.

I regret starting too--but what can you do? You can only move foreword. It's something you decided to try and there's no shame in that. Now you just have to work on finding better skills. And yes, that you did it to begin with is a step, doing it at all is a step--but that you're still not far into it is a big plus, I believe, and it may be easier to find different coping mechanisms since you haven't used this one for a long time.
2ndAndSebring
Hey there- my name is Meredith, and I'm happy to say I haven't self-harmed in a year.

I think getting over it isn't so much of finding a distraction or doing the butterfly thing, but finding something you love. A distraction can either make you think about it or you'll eventually find yourself bored and willing to hurt yourself again; if there is something you love you'd want to get better at it, and that's a better distraction than stuff like watching TV. I started hurting myself (cutting, burning, etc.) because I was constantly told how I'm stupid and would never amount to anything; worrying about that and then having added stress because I wasn't able to focus in school, I couldn't handle it all and started cutting. But then I found something I was good at, which would be music and art, and I decided I'd rather spend my life doing something I love and living to see things get better than risk myself dying when things are still bad.

I was right, things got better for me. Sometimes you don't need a counselor, you just need to find something to want to wake up every morning for, a dream you can't accomplish if you don't stop harming.

Also, another website you can add to your list: www.twloha.com <- To Write Love On Her Arms
That is amazing!!! Hopefully at one point I will be at that point. smile

That's true. Finding you love, finding a distraction, new coping methods, etc. For me, the butterfly project works most of the time. But finding something you love probably would help more. I think having pet rats in the future will be of great help to me--they're loving and friendly creatures and I am getting them in the near future. I'm excited to buy them this cage and spoil the living daylights outta them ^_^

But anyway, yes!1 I have heard of that site. I will definitely add that!!

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